lost confidence

bambi9 started this discussion · 3/29/2012

Hi, I have been pole dancing for about 3 years now and seriously for about a year. I am feelin discourgaed. I feel like things are not coming as quickly as they did. I am also feeling WEAK at best during certian moves particularly when I am attempting the butterfly and some other upside down moves. I find it really disheartening that people that are less than a year in are passing me by like I am standing still. I know it isn't a competition and that everyone learns at there own rate. Do you have any ideas as to how to get these feelings in check and move back into the happy fun world of pole dancing that I am missing 🙁

8 replies

chemgoddess1 · 3/29/2012
This seems to rampant right now. Amy just wrote a blog about it and there have been a bunch of posts in the last month or so with poeple in the same spot. I am seeing it all over facebook too! There is a lot of good infor in the following threads....one is what I wish I was told and the other is long term motivation. Hope you find them helpful. https://www.studioveena.com/forums/view/What_do_you_wish_someone_had_told_you_20120322105630 https://www.studioveena.com/forums/view/Long_term_motivation_20120322111841
ORGANIC ANGEL · 3/29/2012
Hmmm, how often are you poling? Could you be pregnant? Pole felt a lil more tiring while I was. Something that helps me is to get feedback from my instructor of body placement and correct placement of P.O.C. (point of contact). Can you personally see your teacher to get a private for some pointers? I love these. They are priceless. Hope you get through this rut🌸
bambi9 · 3/29/2012
I am poling 3 days a week for 2-3 hours at a time. No way I am pregnant. Thanks for the advice. I am hoping the feeling passes. If not I might be going for a private to see if I can get it together.
Lyme Lyte · 3/29/2012
Well, first don't comapre yourself. If I were to do that, I would have quit months ago. I am 46 so things take me a lot longer. I see people here who have been poling a few months who can do much more than I. This sounds wierd, but I enjoy recodring my practices and looking back on them. I think, "wow, that is me"! This keeps me going. Maybe Chem posted the link, but there is a very odd learning curve with pole. At first you learn a lot quick, then the breaks come on.....happened to me about six months ago. I couldn't learn anything new, but I knew this was a normal part of the learning "curve". But I continued to push through, continue to practice, my rut was probably six months and then within two weeks, I got my extended butterfly (which was my nemisis for many months), my brass monkey and even my Shoulder Mount! Many people mention "changing it up" when you get in a rut, like do more spins, work on dancing etc. so that is an option. Actually, I am going to buy a chair and start to learn some chair dance moves for my next "rut". Good luck and I think it helps to POST videos as well, all the positive feedback helps keep you going as well. Good luck!
HotelChick · 3/29/2012
This is definitely going around lately! Chem posted some great links. There are some good ideas in those discussions, and there's always tons of support for you here. Dance it out, and like Lyme said, post a video for feedback. I'm not able to make it to Friday chat or do Skype jams, but many here are, and most find it very supportive and helpful. Good luck!
UTpoler · 3/29/2012
Poling is definitely cyclical. Try not to compare and allow yourself to ride out the low points...when you climb out of it, you'll get your mojo back. I go through ups and downs all the time. hang in there!
JeHanne · 3/29/2012
I like to mix it up when I feel in a rut... if my strength feels stagnant I work on flexibility and flow. If I am sick of flexibility I work on flow and strength etc. I like to keep the activities varied to help me stay motivated and focused. We all progress at our own rates and at our own time. It is very damaging to compare ourselves to others. Our bodies and life experiences are all so different. I bet you have come a long way from the very first time you got on a pole. If you were to assess yourself in a year or two from this very moment, I also bet you would progress from where you are now. Just take care of yourself and work towards your goals. Not someone elses goals or achievements. Definitely hang in there!
tiggertail · 3/30/2012
I know how you feel girl. I haven't pole much in the last 4-5 months but my good friend Tovah start to kick my butt in the last few weeks. Doing skype session a few time a week is really helpful because it give me the motivation i lost on the way. I know i don't go as fast as i use to and even lost some of my moves but i feel it's coming back. It just made 2 years a ferw day ago since the beginning of my journey and yes it's full of up and down. I'm sure the're a lot of tips here to help you get more energy( feeling like that too) and you'll be back on you feets really soon.