Glaminatrix started this discussion ·
Just curious lol. I didn't know being asexual was even an option until recently... but now that I know, it made alot of sense. I've only found one other asexual in that community that practices pole, I would like to meet others.
Sign in or create a free account to reply.
*waves* Hi there!
omgYAY!
Are you a part of any asexy online communities? I found what I think may be the main one but would like to find more.
I'm not, no; I tend to join in with LGBT communities, which are generally happy to accept anyone with a minority sexuality and/or gender identity. :)
I didnt know what "asexual" meant so I googled it and it says that it means your not attracted to male or female. Is this what it is? If so I am not asexual however this is interesting if it does mean this I have never heard of this before!
I always thought of asexual as relating more to absolutely no interest in sex? Maybe I'm wrong--I just remember seeing a news story (60 Minutes or something like that,) on it once, and if I remember correctly, that's what they were getting at. I don't think it's necessarily that asexuals aren't attracted to either men or women, just that any relationships they are in whether gay or straight are not of a sexual nature. If I'm interpreting that correctly, anyway.
asexual is more or less basically having no drive for sex. Asexuals can still find themselves attracted to other people either male or female but for other reasons. Some still have romantic relationships and some don't even have a desire for that (aromantic asexuals). So yes horsecrazy pretty much has it right :)
I used to kick about on the Aven forums a bit. There was a period of my life during which I identified as asex, though in my case, things changed over time and I'm not any more. I'm always surprised at the low profile asexuality has.
estine ·
oh wow my friends and i always joked that one of our friends is asexual and I did not think that theres actually a community of people who are asexual....but yes she always talks about how if she wants to get married or if she were toget married that she doesn't want to have any sexual aspect of it. She just wants it to be like they're friends but married. She still sometimes says that a guy is attractive though.
I don't think I'm quite asexual, but I think I have a lower than average libido. I probably pole dance for reasons similar to someone who identifies as asexual. I never expect to "get some" or turn anybody on. I've never seduced my husband by dancing. My husband has watched me practicing just a few times. While he appreciates the strength it takes, he has made clear to me that it doesn't really do anything for him sexually and he's rather indifferent about it. So, I'm absolutely sure this is something I do for myself. I mostly enjoy it for fitness, flexibiity, and athletic skills. Sometimes I try the sexy moves just to be silly and humor myself.
I too had to google this as never heard of it before.. Is being asexual done through choice or like choose not to have a sexual relationship? Do guys really choose not to have sex, I mean can they go without ?? Or does it mean they just have no sex drive at all..? Confused?!!
I define as asexual the way other people define as homosexual, or bisexual, or heterosexual. It's not a choice I made, it's just what I am. :) I do 'choose' not to have sex, but that's because I don't WANT sex. I'm completely not interested in it at all. Physically I am able to have sex, but I don't enjoy it. So I choose not to enter into a sexual relationship with anyone, because for me it would require forcing myself to do something I hate. The same way someone who is straight doesn't choose to be straight, but they choose not to enter into a relationship with someone of the same gender because they wouldn't enjoy it. It doesn't necessarily mean you have no sex drive at all; plenty of people who are asexual enjoy, um, taking care of business by themselves, lol. It just means you have no desire to have sex *with another person*.
wow.. I am sorry if I sounded a bit rude. I honestly did not have a clue what it was. Its your choice to live that way.. I just wondered when meeting men or dating,.. it must pose a problem for some... So many questions in my head about this but I wont bore you with them thanks for sharing, heck at 41 years of age, you would of thought i would have heard of that before...
I don't think you sounded rude at all Sues :) And yes Terpsikhore, some people think that autosexuals don't quite qualify as asexual but I could be considered auto :blush: I noticed that the asexy community sometimes struggles with eliteism so maybe the LGBT community would be more welcoming? And ya asexuality can be fluid in some people, look at me, I have a kid already lol
I am not currently asexual but have a very low sex drive, I have sex with my bf but mainly for him not for me. It's nice to meet you 3ver,
i'm currently asexual...well, auto :blush:, but not as much as before. for me there were a lot of life matters that contributed & still contribute to my asexuality. it was an extreme for me, i was a rather sexual inclined (monogamous) person so for that desire to become nonexistent was a big shock. but i think that's why i'm happy to have discovered pole dancing! it's truly helped me to atleast find my sensual side again. though i'm not about to jump out & have sex, i'm more open to the thought of it & hopefully i'll find someone special to light that fire, lol.
blacksnake ·
i am asexual i used to go on aven but dont seel to fit does any one know of any sites that welcome asexuals apart from aven?
hmmm sometimes I wish I were asexual :P I don't agree with premarital sex, and that was a bit hard when I had a boyfriend as I was very much attracked to him. :) So to answer Sues question: Yes men can go without. I know plenty (from my churhc for eg.)... but the nutty thing is my ex wasn't Christian and basically didn't have sex because he knew how important it is for me to wait until I'm married. He's an amazing guy, and obviously loved me deeply. Anyhoo, enough about that or I might get a tad bit nostalgic and upset :P I do find it hard to believe that asexual people exist. I mean, if there is no one interesting in your life and you're busy than I can see how you simple aren't interested.... but when you are with someone that you care about... woah!
That story I saw on asexuals actually featured a married couple where both the man and woman were asexual, so obviously they cared about each other, just not sex. They actually had kids together because they'd wanted kids, so sex to them was purely for breeding purposes, and as soon as they had all the kids they wanted, sex was a total non-issue. So it is true that no matter how much some people care about their partner, they just don't want to sleep with them. It's just odd to think about from the perspective of someone who is not asexual, because obviously you want that connection with your partner and can't imagine not wanting it. I didn't even know asexuality really existed until a few years ago. I imagine it's probably fairly rare; people have different sex drives, some a lot lower than others, and that can change throughout life especially for women with menopause and whatnot, but most people at some point have some desire for sex. Does anyone know, statistically speaking, how common asexuality is? On the same level as homosexuality, more, less? I'm just curious; I've never known anyone who was asexual. Actually, most of the people I've known have gone the other way. lol
interesting topic and very hard for me to fathom. NYMPHdancer, Naughty NYMPHadora. yeah there is a reason most of what I use has the word Nymph in it. Just add the O and that is me lol. And Chemmie I can hear you giggling from here even though you are 5 hours away.
@Nymphdancer, I think you may be hearing me giggle too, lol. But I think I'm further than 5 hours away...try Ontario. Let me clarify, giggling at nymph's comment (because I also relate to enjoying sex...ahem...a lot), not giggling at the topic. Don't want to hurt any feelings here. :)
I plead the fifth.....of vodka that is!!!
Theshyone ·
I'm Asexual! A BiRomantic Asexual to be precise! Lol. We do exist. :)
is a biromantic Asexual someone who doesnt have sex but romances both females and males?
I guess if there are people that are "nymphos", it makes sensce there are people who are also asexual. People are made straingt, gay, bisexual, trans-sexual, whaterever. We are all people with feelings who love, care, cry, feel pain and hapinness........ have all the same emotions. One thing we all DO have in common in this site is we ALL love to POLE! XOXO Everyone have a GREAT DAY!!!!!!!!!
