How to Deal with a Troll! a primer!

moonflower started this discussion · 1/5/2012

First off, I want to say that I love this forum, and I'm posting this becasue I dont; want to see it tear itself to shreds as I've seen elsewhere. Alright ladies and gentlemen, I think it's time we sat down and talked about growing up on the internets. It seems to me from the reaction I'm seeing to Payton's posts, that a few people in this forums may be newbs on the internet and need a primer on how to deal with trolls. Payton is a troll. Pure and simple. She is here to incite a response, to be provocative. She is here for entertainment, and your hot headed response is what she is looking for. If you stoop to name calling, or react in anger, or try to defend yourself...she has won. She managed to side track Veena's great thread completely, and she did it wit YOUR help. That's right, everyone who got angry or defensive HELPED her sidetrack the thread. What about the next thread she trolls in? Will that get side track as well? I've seen forums completely destroyed this way. Here are links on how to deal with trolls. http://soshable.com/dealing-with-trolls/ http://www.angelfire.com/space/usenet/

47 replies

Danielle Tillie · 1/5/2012
This is something we should all be aware of, I agree! We have ourselves a troll and a pretty good one at that. She's found our community an easy target by insulting the site and its owners, who we all care about. It's been too easy for her to get heated responses out of us. I believe we should all follow that golden internet rule: "Do not feed the trolls!"
HotelChick · 1/5/2012
Thank you @moonflower for the info. It all makes sense now.
Mary Ellyn · 1/5/2012
Speaking of trolls...I just looked at Paytons profile for the first time: Name PaytonPlays Gender Female Age 33 Years Hi my name is Payton. I live in Boston MA and im 32 years old. I used to be a dancer a long time ago and my husband Chris just bought me an XPole for Christmas. So excited. I am here to make friends and learn pole fitness And on another thread she states she owns PS poles! Really????
Mary Ellyn · 1/5/2012
Oh good lord...until I copied it I didn't see it... PaytonPlays.... Peyton Place.... Anyone else see a connection here? Could this be a hint? I think we've been had big time by this troll!
Darcey · 1/6/2012
LOL this is so funny. I just said EXACTLY this on the other demo thread. I see it exactly as you do - she is a troll flat out plain and simple. Does this site have the ignore feature? That's really nice on other boards I go to - I put all the trolls on ignore. Anyway, I'm glad you are making others aware. She needs to be ignored, with or without the feature.
luvlee · 1/6/2012
I really miss the block feature that use to be on this sight.
HollySatine · 1/6/2012
If you act like a child, you should be treated like a child. And what do you do with a child that's throwing a temper tantrum? Ignore it. Eventually she'll get bored.
jade s · 1/6/2012
Moonflower, thanks for posting this. I admit that I was mortified reading the other posts on which PP so rudely commented on. I have no problem with people voicing their opinions, but the manner in which she has done so is downright malicious. It mad me both angry and sad, and I refused to respond to any of her comments. That said, with the exception of this one particular persons need to try to spread her bitterness, I love this site! In the last 2 years I've danced at 6 different studios. I attend classes at 3 studios currently. I've found that often there is so much drama that can start, students trying tomout do each other, studio owners bad mouthing each other... On here it just seems like everyone is so supportive and encouraging. We don't just share our pole experiences on here...we share our lives. We share our frustrations, our accomplishments, our ups and downs. We know about each others relationship issues, health problems, pregnancies, and the loss of a loved one... I appreciate everyone's love and support on this site and try to give it in return. It pains me to see someone step out of line and try to damage open, positive relationships that Veena, Webmaster, and so many members have built. I personally would not shed any tears if we never heard from PP again!
LopsiJulie · 1/6/2012
Hiya girls, I don't know what happened exactly, but I really don't like this thread either. Ganging up on a person and calling them a troll really isn't friendly. :( I hope that never happens to me. She's obviously hurt, angry, or bored. Instead of saying something mean, it might be worth to show her some love instead. (You guys are generally really polite and I do think you have good intentions, but this breaks my heart as much as any bickering... again, I didn't read the other thread, but please can we end all of this and go back to talking about what we love: POLE! So ummm you guys fan of twisty grip, true grip, or split grip? And which moves do you prefer to use each grip with?) xxx
chemgoddess1 · 1/6/2012
Lopsi...a troll is a very well known internet name for someone who comes in with the intent to start heated debates. This is not an insult. Please read the definitions that are in the original link.
Krista Bocko · 1/6/2012
Amen. Here's the link to troll definitions that I posted in the other thread. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=troll Other forums I've been on have had an 'ignore' feature....which would be nice. Banning her would be nice, too. :)
Urban DictionaryUrban Dictionary: trolltroll: One who posts a deliberately provocative message to a newsgroup or message board with the intention of causing maximum disruption and argument
Lina Spiralyne · 1/6/2012
I think most people posting more or less provoking comments are probably discontent with themselves in some way, and I think usually banning isn't necessary (unless they are not really humiliating someone). Just don't respond or react to comments which seem provoking on purpose, then it will be pointless for them to continue. And if they're really here to discuss pole and make friends they will soon realize that they will have to change their tone!
LopsiJulie · 1/6/2012
Sorry girls, but just because a "troll" has a defined word doesn't make it friendly. I mean, most swear words and insults also have a well known definition. :( I'm not trying to defend what she's done and written, but just that I think it's also sad to see how people are reacting. I had a glance at the posts (and gave up reading quickly because it made me really sad), and people making fun of other people (whether it's by calling them fat or the fact that they misspell words, which I do ALL the time) is just uncool. Like I said, I know this thread was posted with good intentions, but let's try to be loving, supportive and friendly (which SV normally is). I wrote on her wall asking some pole questions. I mean who knows, maybe she joined the community, and expected people to say hi and welcome her... and maybe she didn't feel welcome and is lashing out. I don't know. I don't know her, but I'm hoping that this will just blow over. I mean, North Americans are quite blunt (I'm Canadian, and I am quite blunt). I am living in the UK, and I've been misunderstood so many times. People think I'm rude and abrassive (although back in Canada I wouldn't be....)... so I guess I can relate a bit (although her words were VERY extreme and I don't think appropriate as many people stated... I hate name calling). Anyways, I really respect everyone and this website and have come to value my friendships here. I will no longer be responding to posts regarding this thread or any others link to this. I am near tears because it's sad to see what's happened in the past couple days... xx PS. Thank you Lynette for your constructive post. :) I'm going to take it into action and only discuss pole now! :D
Krista Bocko · 1/6/2012
Julie, I try to give people the benefit of the doubt. There comes a point when it's too much. Not respecting the forum and its owners and the namecalling is where it breaks down for me and needs to stop. Some people really enjoy that kind of thing and creating chaos. I don't understand it. Maybe they'll change, however I have witnessed this exact behavior on other boards though and haven't seen it to be so. Again, JMHO.
Mary Ellyn · 1/6/2012
LopsiJulie...you said you didn't read the other thread...maybe you should. It would explain a lot. Dealing with confrontational people on the internet -whether you tag them with a name or not - is a very real problem and the links posted about it are very helpful. For those of you who didn't get my comparison about her name...Peyton Place was a movie which later became a tv series known for drama and scandal. Some of us who are older will be familiar with how people use to refer to dramatic situations by calling it a "Peyton Place" much like some people say a situation is just "like soap opera". I find it interesting that she used the name PaytonPlays and believe there is something intentional there...especially since she just signed up and her profile says she has an XP but on a thread says she owns PS poles.
poledanceromance · 1/6/2012
I have to agree with Empyrean on this one, I should have noticed the username. The fact is that "trolls" aren't real users that we have to be nice or welcoming to. An internet troll is a user who puts up a fake profile with the express purpose of abusing the functions of a website. The double entendre username and the lack of any personal info on the profile shows that this is likely a troll. This website has open access. Anyone can join. That's a good thing for us, but the website has become more high profile over the years, and I've seen it linked to and mentioned on really high-traffic websites. There are a lot of people out there who just want to cause trouble on websites just like this one for pure S&Gs. And no amount of being "nice" to them will change that. The only thing you can do to a troll is ignore, ban, and move on.
luvlee · 1/6/2012
This is not unusual on the Internet. We have all been lucky. The bigger it gets though, the more this will happen and it is best ignored. I am on many other forums and this is a big issue. Usually you can block or ignore them though. Usually they are deleted for such behavior too.
moonflower · 1/6/2012
Julie: Would it make you feel better if I reword it and say that "We are being trolled" or "She is trolling us"? That way, the word "troll" is being used as a verb to describe her ACTIONS (commenting with the sole purpose of getting a rise out of us for shits and giggles) rather than the person. Also, I think any sort of banning should be done as a very last resort, it's a slippery slope.
moonflower · 1/6/2012
Also, good catch on the user name Empy!
nilla · 1/6/2012
I believe you're right Moonflower. PaytonPlays has some pretty in depth opinions on the inner workings of companies in the pole world for a recreational poler. She claims to know things about the owner of x-pole and his dealings with studios, she claims to know about pole competitions and what the competitors use, and which studios use what, as well as things about the whole pole dance demographic. Although the opinions she draws from her "knowledge" are thinly supported. At first I thought maybe she really doesn't know better, which is why I responded, but it appears she knows exactly what she's doing. It's sad cause PS makes good poles. I think of thier permanent poles as ideal for studio use, and xpoles as ideal for recreational use or for studios that need to set up and take down poles in diff locations. PaytonPlays seems like she's trying to support PS but she's just making PS look really really bad by association alone.
Darcey · 1/6/2012
Lopsijulie - the person with the name Paytonplays is a troll - that is what they are called. ON the internet today, it happens ALL THE TIME. You can't sugar coat it. It's not like miss susie was being a bit of a B and then everyone called her a troll. This is a person that has one purpose, to go in chat rooms and message boards and disrupt things. That is a troll. Call it what it is for gosh sakes. Find out how to ban/ignore/or remove her. It's disruptive. All trolls are. Except on message boards where people know how to deal with them. Then you can kind of fart around with them too...even though every thing that comes out of their mouth is nasty.
Darcey · 1/6/2012
Luvlee - yes most of the posts of the trolls on other boards I am on get deleted. Anyone notice how all of a sudden miss Paytonplays has nothing to say. Oops.....move on to another boards to wreak some havoc I'm sure.....
Katherine McKinney · 1/6/2012
It's kinda funny, actually. With that name, she had troll written all over her. I think the problem is that everyone here IS too nice and supportive. If the only response to her original thread had been: U MAD? http://gamerabies.comhttps://pub-a085b59791bc4c1a94b0a223a67a37d6.r2.dev/wp-uploads/2011/04/Sony-UMad-300x224.png She/he would have known immediately that we caught the trolling and it would have ended there. Another good way to flush out a suspected troll is to say, COOL STORY, BRO. Lol, sorry, I'm on the interwebs waaaay too often. ;) Besides this semi-serious answer, though, ignoring a troll is really the only way to get rid of it. No audience, no drama.
luvlee · 1/7/2012
I almost replied that but I was like no one is going to know what I mean. I am on the net way to often too. LOL!!!!
Cherished · 1/7/2012
I'm not sure what the rules are here but I personally think posters who insult other members should be banned or at least have their post edited or deleted. I've noticed when inappropriate comments were made towards other members here it was dealt with very quickly and the comment was removed so I don't think that Webmaster should have to put up with insults directed towards him when he and V take time to keep us protected from such abuse. A difference of opinion is great but bashing another person is not. I also see this as trolling.

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