Help with talk on Pole Dancing!

HazelHotpants started this discussion · 6/5/2011

Hey Veeners!!!! In less than two weeks I will be doing a 30 - 45 mins talk on pole dancing for a W.I. meeting. (Not sure if these exsist in america, but it stand for Womens Institute and the age range for my group in 40 - 90). I have been told by the lady who has asked me to do it, some of the ladies are still stuck in their way.... 😕 so... i've come here for advice on what I should talk about. I am sssoooo excited that I get the chance to spread the word and maybe change a few views on pole dancing. 🥂 I just don't know where to begin. I was wondering whether to do a performance for them before or after the talk. I was going to do it after, but didnt want to show them amazing pictures of other dancers.... when im not that good yet. So then thought of maybe talking for 15mins.... then do a little dance for them.... then finish off the talk. If anyone had any reference materials I could take from.... or any help with what I can talk about would be greatly appreciated. I have already thought about doing some print outs of how some pole poses are similar to gymnastics. And even though I love the slow and sultry side of pole, I think for this talk i need to avoid it. 🙁 And finally song choice.... at the mo I am going with florence and the machines... but still not 100% sure if this is the right choice for my age range. Thanks in advance!!!! 🙂

16 replies

Runemist34 · 6/5/2011
Wow, sounds like a wonderful opportunity, and also very nerve-wracking! I would say that, if you're talking AT them, then go with the media-approach: Don't talk about the things that pole dancing ISN'T, but instead talk about what it IS. This might seem rather straightforward, but sometimes we like to make comparisons, such as "Well, you might think that this is only for strippers, but actually..." Unfortunately for most people, this still engages their imagination, and suddenly they're thinking about strippers, instead of what pole dance can be otherwise! If, however, you're doing more of a Q and A, then it's a bit more freeform; if they ask about the stripper thing, then answer it, straightforward and to the point. I don't really recommend just ignoring the fact that they WILL think of the sleazy, stripper-y aspect when they think of pole dancing...you can address it, either way. But I would just talk about it more matter-of-fact, like "Pole dancing has evolved in strip clubs, but it's now branched out, and become a form of fitness." Rather than trying to hide it. I'll point out here that I have the utmost respect for strippers, but I know that some people don't, so that's what I mean here. You could potentially talk about the empowerment aspect, how one can dance for oneself, instead of dancing for a partner or anyone else. It allows people to gain a sense of their body, what they may or may not be comfortable with, a sense of space and balance. It allows them to explore the subtle ideas of inner sexuality, rather than the ideas of sexuality as we see it between two people. And, I was going to say to do the dance at the end...but I kind of like doing it sort of in the middle! It lets them see how much strength it takes, and how beautiful you can be! :) Good luck with it! I hope it all goes well!
HollySatine · 6/5/2011
"This might seem rather straightforward, but sometimes we like to make comparisons, such as "Well, you might think that this is only for strippers, but actually..." Unfortunately for most people, this still engages their imagination, and suddenly they're thinking about strippers, instead of what pole dance can be otherwise!" Great point Runemist!
Dancing Paws · 6/5/2011
I suggest calling it "pole fitness." You could also mention that a lot of polers, including teachers, have never even been to a strip club.
Dancing Paws · 6/5/2011
I suggest calling it "pole fitness." You could also mention that a lot of polers, including teachers, have never even been to a strip club.
Veena · 6/5/2011
Let them know pole dance has been a great way for many moms to get their bodies back! Pole dance is fun and it can be for everyone. I would not even mention the words exotic or stripper as Runemist suggested. But it may be nice to mention that some women find its a great way to get in touch with their feminine side.
Lyme Lyte · 6/5/2011
What sensualscimitar said.....call it pole fitness, not pole dancing.
Lyme Lyte · 6/5/2011
What sensualscimitar said.....call it pole fitness, not pole dancing.
JBStarryEyedGirl · 6/7/2011
This sounds like an AWESOME oppportunity to talk some new women into trying pole dance! =) Just don't go into your presentation thinking that people are judging you or that they are disapproving. You would be surprised by how many women have always secretly wanted to try it, or are totally supportive of it, especially the older mom aged crowd! As for bringing up strippers/strip clubs/ calling it dance vs fitness.. I guess that is a personal choice. People in class asked if I was a stripper, I just laughed and said no. I just enjoy pole dancing. And thats that. (I mean, just because I have sex, it doesn't make me a porn star LOL!!) Explain that clothes must stay on in class. Whatever happens, just address it honestly and with good humor and then MOVE ON! If I were you.. I would start off the presentation with some clips of some REALLY fantastic polers. Play them some jaw dropping, crazy beautiful pole dance and tricks. Any time I show non poling friends people like Jenyne, Fawnia, Veena, etc they are always stunned and enthusiastic. It's ok to show them what CAN be done. Talk to them with joy, and express how great dancing feels, and helps the body in so many ways. You can emphasize not only the skill, and the strength, but also that you can take it at your own pace, and the confidence you gain with your yourself. Finish off with some simpler spins and maybe even have some volunteers try it out? Have cards or literature to hand out too! Remember, eye on the prize.. New potential POLERS! Have fun and good luck girly!
mizvix · 6/7/2011
Priceless quote from my mum - mid 50s - which may help you decide on images.... After showing her the clip of Natasha Wang on 'The View' (Hope i got the Tv show right!), her response to other people saying how fab and beautiful and elegant she was was simple, straightforward and cutting: at least she isn't dressed like a slapper. Prejudice doesn't go away easily, and no matter how impressive things are to us, others may look at them in a completely different way! good luck with your talk!!!
HazelHotpants · 6/7/2011
Thank you sssooo much for all the help! Starting to write it now. Thanks Runemist34 for the tip on if i mentions strippers, this will then what they will picture. :) I just wish I was better on the pole so can do it justice. But will just have to explain how amazing it is. I think I might do a demonstration on why I have to wear so little.... like a teddy and a jade to show the skin grabbing, I have mentioned about Chinese pole too where you can be fully clothed. (By the way.... i have no issues with strippers.... I used to work in a bar myself. Just dont think the ladies of the W.I would 'get it' :) I wanted to show some clips of felix or alethea, etc. But there will be about 30 - 40 women and they wudnt all be able to see my laptop. :( so everything will have to be on handouts. Does anyone have any suggestions on pictures? I am going to printout some competition posters, like the pole art one (which i think is beautiful) And V, thanks for the idea about moms getting back into shape...i want to be able to relate to them and ths is a great idea. I need to start thinkin of a routine now as well... 😕 Thanks for the help.... and obviously will still appreciate more suggestions.... i think I have written about 5 mins worth.... just another 25 to go. :)
KateSykerd · 6/8/2011
My mum actually calls it pole gymnastics, and refuses to call it anything else lol! Shes actually in the W.I of sorts, and I know that once she actually saw me poling she warmed to it so much more, so I think a routine is a great idea. You could talk about how it's for everybody - young, old, mums and daughters, even guys do it! A tip for public speaking, no matter how long it takes you to say it in private it'll take you at least 10% longer in front of people. I also like to practice saying the wrong thing to see how I could recover from it- nothing worse than slipping up and only bein able to say "Erm" while you try to remember what to say!
Aly77 · 6/9/2011
I know you said this is for the Womens Institute, and your target group is ladies, but you could possibly mention that a lot of men are participating as well because they realize that it is a form of exercise. You could talk about the organizations, associations, and federations that have been formed to brings standards, safety, training, etc., to the pole community. Good luck on your presentation!!!!!
Charley · 6/9/2011
I didn't get a chance to read everyone's responses yet but I will. I think part of what makes pole dancing unique and desirable to do is that it is sexy, it does have a stigma. Pole dancing takes "pole dance" out of the strip clubs and away from men, it's no longer only being used as a phalic symbol and girls are no longer being forced to dance on it. Whether we agree with sexy dancing,pole dancing or whatever...we can all agree that at the end of the day the message here is women making a choice to do something because they want to, not because they are financially being held hostage by an establishment to do it, because it's their choice. Women making choices about their bodies is a good thing no matter where you're from. Unlike many forms of dancing, pole dancing can be performed and enjoyed at a basic level - it doesn't require a prerequisite of any other training to do it and to look beautiful. Pole dancing puts all of us in a room in tiny clothing with our bodies and our emotions exposed and we as women learn to support each other rather than attack each other, we learn to love ourselves for who and what we are, accept our imperfections with humility and self kindness and accpet others for their strengths and weaknesses. We might find ourselves admiring and befriending those we never would in the real world, we strip away the book covers and everyone is the same but yet different in their own beautiful ways. We learn to let go of the body conciousness we walk around with, learn to let go of the feelings of inadequacy and learn to let others in and trust them. So much is done for women in pole dancing classes that is so beauitful. I think that openly discussing the elephant in the room will force the women listening to truly hear what you have to say. I think if we try to clean it up or overly mainstream it that people look at us and think "yeah, that's nice but what about the women doing this for money in clubs naked?" And instead of telling them that "stripping" is wrong...why not discuss the truth about it. Stripping is an occupation that many girls choose to do because it's the only job with a flexible schedule that can earn you high income. It's immensely difficult to dance naked in front of wanton men and deal with begin groped and propositioned all night, or rejection - there is a lot of rejection that comes with stripping. Educate them about that. Educate people that the reason many girls begin abusing substances is because they need to in order to perform their job, it's no different than the factory worker who abuses perscription drugs to ease his pain on the line, a woman's pain stripping is just different and in some ways the same, spending 8 hours a night in 8 inch heels is hard on the feet and back. Many of the great pole dancers came from strip clubs. That's okay. Think about how strong you have to be to self teach yourself pole tricks all the while dealing with drug addicted people, handsy customers, bars charging YOU to be naked...The strength of character it takes to leave that kind of sad but yet comfortable environement is A LOT. they leave the money behind and all they take is this ability to perform and dance beautifully and they openly gave it to everyday women who have a CHOICE to dance or not. It's evolved into a mind body workout that all over the world gives women strength, courage and their sensuality back to them. The choice to pole dance is ours to make and should be respected. The addiction to pole dancing is so strong once you do your first baby spin around the pole - the control you learn to have over your body is intoxicating...the more we advance as pole dancers the more control we physically gain and that control in my opinion leads to mental and emotional control. That's why I love pole dancing so much. It's not just tricks but what those tricks mean to me each time I nail a new one, how good it feels to dance around and be pretty, the feeling of knowing I'm making a choice to have a healthier body and the friendships and connections I've made with women I wouldn't otherwise meet who have also exercised their right to choose this as their hobby and workout.
HellsBells · 6/9/2011
Wow i think Charley just wrote your talk for u! Awesome!
Mary Ellyn · 6/9/2011
"I think that openly discussing the elephant in the room will force the women listening to truly hear what you have to say. Love this analogy!
HazelHotpants · 6/9/2011
Charley.... i may just quote everything you have just said... that was exactly the point I was trying to get across. I orginally started writing it with the intention of not mentioning stripping or exotic dancing at any point.... but it is impossible not too... I cant deny the fact that it exhists and it is actually an important part of the development of pole dancing. If it didnt happen in the clubs would we be doin it for fitness now?!