Are you a "discreet" or "open" pole dancer?

PandalinaHooker started this discussion · 7/16/2013

OK! Here I am again, being all scientific and stuff. As many of you probably know, I'm doing my class project on the online pole dancing community! Since my last "Group" interview is going so well (See "Tell me your pole story! :)") I figured I would send some of my other questions your way! As before, I plan to use responses in my project but intend to protect your anonymity so I wont use your name unless you specifically say I can. :) That being said, I'd like to know your thoughts on pole dancing and it's relation to society! Here are some questions to help point you in the direction of the information I'm looking for: Is there a difference between Exotic Dancing and Pole Fitness? What is the difference if any? Do you think people should use their real names when they perform/go to classes, or should they use a stage name? Why? Are you a “Discreet” pole dancer, or an “Open” pole dancer? Why/What are the positive and negatives to each? Do you think pole dancing should be a family sport, or reserved for adults? Do you think StudioVeena should be 18+? Why/why not? Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this! :)

11 replies

yrngrl · 7/16/2013
Is there a difference between Exotic Dancing and Pole Fitness? What is the difference if any? I think so. The moves you do may have a lot of overlap, but I think your mindset is the main difference-- as in, your motivation for doing it. I'm not so focused on the sexy aspect of pole (in general), I'm more interested in the strength/flexibilty/fitness end of it. Does this mean I never indulge the sexy side? Of course not, but it's not my focus. Do you think people should use their real names when they perform/go to classes, or should they use a stage name? Why? That should be a personal choice. I have done bellydance performance in the past, and we often used stage names. Personally, I don't have anything to hide, but I totally respect anyone who prefers to keep that side of their life separate from their everyday life, especially for those whose day jobs could be adversely affected (I used to teach elementary school, so I get it!) Are you a “Discreet” pole dancer, or an “Open” pole dancer? Why/What are the positive and negatives to each? Semi open, striving to be more open. At this point I'm telling people, but being choosy about it. I am not so naive to not realize that some have very negative images of pole dancing, but at the same time, I also see the opportunity to educate people and help them view it more openly. Do you think pole dancing should be a family sport, or reserved for adults? I don't have a problem with kids doing it, as long as the sexual aspects are kept out of it for them (not slinking around on the floor, that sort of thing). Do you think StudioVeena should be 18+? Why/why not? Not sure
CapFeb · 7/16/2013
1. Yes. They're different in every way except they both include a pole. Communities are different, goals are mostly different. Dancing style is different. I hate when people relate the two, as I am a part of both communities. To put it in Veena's words, "pole dancers aren't exotic dancers, but exotic dancers are pole dancers." I've seen a few classy stage shows, but not nearly enough to say my industry is classy or artful 2. Personal preference. Some people have jobs they could get fired from if people knew they poled. In this case stage name is better to avoid face book mix ups (tagging pics and what not) 3. I am mostly open. I won't tell someone when I first meet them what I do. I sniff them out and gauge their reaction on a few different topics before I bring it up. But my fb picture is me doing Marley and I am known to street pole whenever I can. Have pole, will dance. 4. Family sport. The us recognizes pole as vertical gymnastics, doesn't it? If 16 year olds can compete in the Olympics for gymnastics, and have been training for it since they were eight, there's no reason they couldn't train vertically. I've seen no correlation between people under 16 having babies or ruining their life because they pole and its what "strippers" do. Besides, most kids sit inside and play video games all day. It's good exercise, let's kids appreciate art, gives them goals, and let's them express their creativity. All the while letting them keep their flexibility they have as kids. 5. Studio Veena is not only for pole. Many people practice silks and Chinese pole, both require a lot more clothing than regular pole. There's also hooping and hammock and contortion. It would be unfair to block anyone of any age because the sites primary focus is something society CONSIDERS sexual. There's no nudity allowed on this site. So no 18+ necessary.
bformosa922163 · 7/17/2013
1. There is a difference between exotic and pole fitness, as CapFeb mentioned, they both include a pole however exotic pole dance is more focused on sexy movement whereas pole fitness is more focused on advanced movement. 2. I believe it is up to the individual whether or not they have a stage name. In some cases, it is important to protect the dancer because of the nature of pole dancing. 3. I am open about pole dancing. This may be because the people around me are also open about me doing pole dancing for fitness. I understand that people will have a negative view on it and if they do, I will attempt to explain more about it to them because they obviously don't have a wide range of knowledge of pole dancing. 4. Again, there will always be people who have a negative opinion of pole dancing and only because they don't have extensive knowledge on it. I do believe that pole dancing can be athletic and artistic and therefore shouldn't be turned away from the youth. I like to refer to the pole as a vertical beam. People should also consider that there are vertical poles in playgrounds and they aren't classed as sexual. The only reason pole dancing is classed as sexual is because of the way it is used by exotic dancers and people can't seem to get that image out of their heads. 5. To be honest, anyone can search the net for anything these days. I'm sure anyone under the age of 18 has seen more than what is accessed on studioveena. I do believe that maybe there should be an under 18 section on this site though.
opielee · 7/17/2013
1-is there a diff bet exotic dancing vs pole fitness? As far as tricks n spins no,just dance styles,pole fitness there's more flexible leeway,the dance could be clean n artist or sexy n dirty,but exotic dancing it's strictly all sexy grinding 2-do I think people should use stage names when they perform/go to class or use their real name? For class,just keep it real,no reason to hide, For comp performance,it could go either way, If you're at a club,then an alias is best 3-do I think pole should be a family sport or keep it as adults only? Hmm,this is complicated,I think it should be primarily an 18+ activity only because it's tough explaining the seedier history of pole and justifying your child doing something that will always have a seedy history,that and since kids can pick on the stuff quicker than adults comp wise it puts adults at a disadvantage in terms of that 4-do I think studioveena should be an 18+ site?still mulling over that one,never thought about it really
opielee · 7/17/2013
Oops,forgot to answer one more 5-am I a discreet or open pole dancer? I guess I'm an open poler only to those I feel comfortable discussing pole with,a few coworkers,close friends,and other pole students
AshleyD · 7/17/2013
I just started taking my first pole fitness and electro pole classes a few months ago, and have only told a few close people. I purchased a pole after loving the classes so much and wanting to practice at home plus it's a great workout, and anybody that has seen my pole refers to it as a stripper pole and asks if i'm stripping..it's very annoying. Nothing against strippers, but I see it as more of an art or way of expression now. The pole fitness class I take is strength and conditioning, which is so important for pole moves in general. My electro pole class is SO FUN! Everyone at my studio uses their normal names, as far as exotic dancers goes I think it's up to them. If I were to do that I would use a different name as an "alter ego" but its not something I would ever be comfortable taking up. As far as society goes I think it will be more acceptable in the future, at least where I am from people are still like..um...what?
girlwithgreywings · 7/18/2013
I haven't started pole dancing. Where I live it would be to hard for me to get to a studio, So I'm saving up to get pole. But I hope you don't mind if I answer. As far as I can tell there really is no difference between Stripping and pole dancing really. The only difference is that Strippers work at a Strip club and get paid to take off their clothes and the audience is mostly male. While pole dancers don't get naked and the audience is mostly female.. It doesn't matter if the person on the pole is in a club, in a studio, at competition, or at home, the person that is on the pole is working out and getting the benefit of it. How much you want to learn is up to you as well. I find it intersecting that some of the women writing here, equate stripping with the sexy style of dancing. But I doubt the would call Althea Austin, Leigh Ann Orsi, or Felix Cane a stripper. Everyone should have the ability to dance, however they want and not be looked down on for it. I've been lurking in the forums here and in youtube videos with pole dancing. And over and over I see comments about how the dancer is too sexy or stripper-ish or the dancer is classy and not a slut. While some of the comments are from men, many of the comments are from women. It seems that female sexuality is still scary for many people. I think that children should be allowed to do pole dancing. People are afraid that the children will grow up to be strippers and they are afraid that pedos will target these children. If someone looks at a child doing pole dancing and thinks it's sexy it just shows their is something wrong with that person. As long as the parents are there when the kids are in class, I don't have a problem with it. As long as the kids are going to school, I don't see the problem with kids learning to pole dance.
Staxxz · 7/19/2013
I am a open pole dancer with my family and friends but discreet with Co workers not all of my family know but enough and I love it it makes me feel free and sexy and one day I will be posting a video very soon LOL I'm building up my courage because I'm a plus size chick so I can't do all the cute inverts an ish its way harder for someone over 200lbs trust me it aunt easy but I still enjoy it and its FUN!!
majikmyke · 7/27/2013
PH, I have enjoyed responding to your study and hope it turns out well. Let's get to the interview: Are you a "discreet" or "open" pole dancer? I am an open poler. I have no issues with how others may view me. Having said that I can understand the need for discretion for some pole dancers (pd) as it relates to the work environment. If I were to happen to meet someone that I pd with, and they were with an associate, if asked how I knew them I would simply say that we take a fitness class together. There are people in the business world with very closed minds and way too much starch in their panties. I think it's important around these people to use discretion. Is there a difference between "exotic" pole dancing and "pole fitness?" What is the difference? In the broad sense "exotic" pole dancing takes place in a strip club environment with an occasional pole trick, but lots of sexually enticing movements that put the dancers physical charms on display. While "pole fitness" is about a physical workout by learning different pole maneuvers and holds and combining them into an ongoing routine that demonstrates strength and stamina. In reality these two universes collide; very often in our class warm-ups we'll employ the sexy hip movements, squats, and open leg thrusts of exotic dancers. Or, if the mood is right in class, the ladies will go to the high heels for the session (I go to a bow tie). These moves work a lot of muscles. In turn, exotic dancers employ an occasional trick they have learned from pole dancing/fitness. I say "occasional pole trick" because these ladies (primarily) are working an eight hour shift, and as we know we're exhausted after an hour or two of pole fitness. Imagine how they feel? On the personal level I think all of us want to feel fit, vibrant, and sexy. Pole does that for you. As poler's we need to embrace the reality of where our sport came from, and not try to run away from it. Our job is to educate those around us of the attributes of pole dancing/fitness; low impact strength training for your entire body's muscle groups that hopefully will give you a sculpted appearance. Do you think people should use their real names when they perform/go to classes, or should they use a stage name? Why? People going to a class should use their real names. In a class you're associating with others who have similar interests. Pole dancers who are competitive I can understand them using and having a stage name if they want. On the SV website here we all employ a "handle" or "stage name" for our persona. My "majikmyke" tag takes me into a different personal realm than my real name. We all have different interests, and when we think of a special name as it relates to that interest we mentally transfer our thoughts and energy into that specific area. It's where fantasy and reality coincide in a fun way. Do you think pole dancing should be a family sport? Or, reserved for adults? Pole dancing should be for family members when children are old enough to develop the skills and muscular development necessary to challenge them. This can be through the SV website, or through the class environment. Having made this statement there are some caveats attached, and they are; the SV website, and the classroom. The SV website is covered in the next question. In pole dance/fitness the classroom environment is predominantly women. Make no mistake about it - this is the ladies gym! This is women's private time, and many can be unfiltered when they speak and say things. I have no issues with this. Entering children into a pole class changes this environment. We're certainly not going to use private adult descriptive language in front of children in a class environment. Then there's the issue of sensual/sexy dance (high heels). Again the free environment that many women seek with pole dance now becomes constrained when children are allowed to participate. This is much more controlled by the parents if they're using a pole at home and the SV wesite, Veena's instructional videos as the reference. Do you think Studio Veena should be 18 plus? Why/why not? A portion of this was answered above. However, complete access to the website for those below 18 should be restricted. This has nothing to do with Veena's instruction, but everything to do with the "forum" section. Like the classroom environment where it's the "ladies gym" the "forum" section many times contains adult discussions and references not suited for those below 18. The forum section can be a private area where the ladies, or men in some cases, may want to discuss personal things in an uninhibited manner. I have seen references on the forum portion here at SV that says, "ladies only - please." As adults we are mature enough, and can act with discretion, and say to ourselves, "I'm not wanted here." While we as adults can say this, most children cannot! I don't think many of the SV participants would be comfortable writing and discussing issues in an unfiltered manner that their children would have access too. Therefore, the SV website "forum" and "blog" sections should be restricted to 18, or older.
Lara von Mondberg · 7/27/2013
Hi, so here my answers. Sorry about my English, I am not a native speaker. feel free to use my real name, which is Larisa (really just 1 s, it is the Russian form) Albrecht, I am 38, female, live in Vienna, Austria. Is there a difference between Exotic Dancing and Pole Fitness? What is the difference if any? I believe it is. Exotic dancing is in my opinion more sensual oriented, plus there is undressing and even though pole fitness is a very sexy sport, it is a sport and an dance art. That being said, I have totally respect for exotic dancers, it is a job and the girls have to work their butts off. Not an easy one :) Do you think people should use their real names when they perform/go to classes, or should they use a stage name? Why? I think it depends on how comfortable people feel with other people knowing their real name. I go always under MONDBERG, because it is the name of my clothing line, but I never hide my real name. Although as a fashion designer, I have much bigger freedom of expressing myself, being a bad girl goes with the job well. If I were working in a bank, I would be just semi-open pole dancer in order to avoid prejudice from some customers. Are you a “Discreet” pole dancer, or an “Open” pole dancer? Why/What are the positive and negatives to each? I am a very open pole dancer. I post pictures and videos of my progress and I also hope that I encourage more women to dancing, to dare and to feel great about being sexy and to do sports in general. I am an open person anyway and have no shame or fear of performing. I love the stage and the attention and I love to create things. The negative side: there is always this one person who claims how slutty that is, who gives you the stamp of dumb girl who has nothing in her head, but I don't care at all. I am way beyond the point of trying to prove anything to anyone :) The negative aspect of hidden or discreet pole dancer would be for me that I would not be able to share a big part of my life. I need that, so I rather take bad comments instead of hiding something that important to me. Do you think pole dancing should be a family sport, or reserved for adults? I would have absolutely no problem teaching my daughter pole dance, but in an absolutely non sexual way, until she would grow up. One can teach this wonderful dance art in a very gymnastic way, with less floor work, just tricks and spins. If I look at kids who perform latin dance, that is not far away, because the moves can be also very sexy. So I say, yes, it could be in a way a sport for family, but ONLY with some restrictions. Do you think StudioVeena should be 18+? Why/why not? I would say 18+ is fine. I believe that there is a big responsibility regarding health risk and also some kind of privacy between grown up women. I think that at 18, there may be assumed some kind of self discipline when it comes to following the program, not getting hurt, which I would not expect from people under 18. I hope I could help!
sundcarrie · 7/27/2013
I do think there is a difference in exotic dancing and pole dancing. First I know some places people are actually trained for exotic dancing but most of our area hires anyone who looks good without clothes on or at least that is what I gather since I don't frequent strip clubs. We have had a few strippers come to one or two classes at the studio and quit. I am not sure why but I think they either think it is too hard or they don't like to be corrected on their form since they have taught themselves. Even if you live in an area where you get some training for you pole moves in a strip club I think there is a big difference in the motivation. Strippers are paid to be erotic to bring out the desire in men but even they will vary in thier motivation. To some it will just be a job and to some they just love being sexy. It is the same way in our fitness classes some of the ladies love the whole package they want to feel sexy and they want to get fit. Personally I do like to feel sexy but more than anything I like the challenge of hitting that next move. I like the gymnastics and could spend an entire class just practicing the strength related moves. So I really guess it depends on how you want to define the difference. I am a whatever you want kind of gal when it comes to names. We usually don't come in with stage names but some of us end up with them but I don't think anyone would object to someone having one. We respect everyone and the relationships I have built through pole have actually taught me a lot about how to better respect others and what they choose even if you don't find it to be something you like. I am not discreet anymore for the most part except maybe when I am working. I don't have a traditional job but when someone asks me what I do for fitness while I am in a booth selling organic tea I will usually say I take dance classes. I don't want to drive a customer away, Any other medium even church I tell them exactly what I do and what it has done for me. If they don't like it they can find someone else to talk to and if they need to do so they can pray for me because I am sure it makes them feel better to think they can bring me back from the dark side. As for the family sport thing I would think that classes for younger people would be great but maybe tone down the sexy and focus on the gymnastic side. I think more than anything though some of the things we talk about in our classes would hopefully change with younger girls in the room. So yes I think it could be family oriented but I don't think really young girls should be in the same classes or there should be a separate family class. The last thing is I believe a studio teaching under 18 year olds might have to have a much larger liability policy. I am not sure most places would like to take on the responsibility of a child climbing a pole. Children are often overconfident in their abilities. As for this site and age requirements I think it is a must for anyone teaching online lessons that could easily injure someone. If a parent wants to sign up and take the responsibility I am sure they can, Also I think that there are appropriate things to talk about with children around and inappropriate things and most communities like this are full of things that young children do not need to hear. I am sure it would be find for a teen but at that point a parent can decide.