Your insights and advice needed re. fear of bruising

gina g started this discussion · 10/3/2018

Hey lovely pole posse, I am a newbie, this week will be my 14th week at class :) For the past month going x2 classes per week: one class is for beginner tricks, the other for flexibility and transitions/choreo with little pole work. I also have a pole at home and have just restarted my 30 day take off here at StudioVeena. xx Unfortunately for me I am renowned for starting and then giving up when things get difficult! I only got to day 12 of the Take Off last time :( This week I notice my hesitation when trying to practice ... I seem to be fearful of getting more bruising, and so tend to *pull out* of turns or when I practice tricks. Its like my mind does it automatically and I cant stop. Eg, with the fireman spin I just cant seem to connedt me feet with the pole, when I used to be able to! This is disappointing as I felt so pleased with my progress until now, and I know the only way to get used to the bruising is to keep practicing!! Unfortunately for me I have always bruised very easily (since childhood), I seem to be a little thin-skinned in more ways than one! and I also hate folks pointing out my bruises and asking where I got them. At the moment the pole is just for me :) My hubby, who has been very supportive until now, has also become a little paranoid that everyone will think he is rough-handling me ...! He seems to mention this daily :( At the moment I am using a bruise cream which helps a little (called Hirudoid here in aust), i also have arnica cream in my bag and take homeopathic arnica. Plus Iron and vit C supplements. But to be honest the main issue is the hesitation I feel when trying to practice!?! The *pulling out* of individual moves rather than being able to dive in completely. It is really hindering my progress. I have many other questions for everyone but will leave it there for now! :) Your experience and advice would be much appreciated. Thank you! xx

3 replies

Runemist34 · 10/4/2018
Hey there! It sounds like you're being given a lot of social reasons not to want bruises- things like your husband's fears, and being afraid of people pointing them out, and such. So, my suggestion would be to deal with those, first. If you aren't worried about what will happen if you have bruises, you'll be less likely to try to avoid them, and potentially put yourself into a place where you can't progress... or even worse, do something even more dangerous for your body! So, the first thing: Your husband's fears are *his* fears, and they are, of course, quite unfounded (I mean, I certainly hope so!). So, it's more of something in your husband, than in other people. It would be good to talk to him about why he has those fears, as well as reassure him that people won't think such a thing, and perhaps give you both a game-plan in case someone actually does this. Having that game plan can also help when it comes to people pointing out bruises. It could be the same way you get away from any prying or insinuations personally, or together. The best one, to me, is to simply tell people "I've started a new exercise plan," or something like that. Most exercise will result in bruises! I lift weights, and do yoga, AND I run, and who's to say those bruises are from any one of those, or from pole dancing? I'm also crazy clumsy (It comes with the territory of having ADHD, especially untreated) so, any particularly "weird" bruises I can explain that way, too. Beyond that... I suppose just reminding yourself that you are fine, you're doing something good for yourself, and that bruising is inevitable. You don't need to be afraid of it, and you don't need to be afraid of other people.
Veena · 10/4/2018
Hi Gina g! Have you tried working on flow instead of tricks and spins for a while? Focusing on flow could help you get a better sense of how your body moves and help you feel more connected. Flow pole doesn't rely on tricks but rather movement! If you're interested, check out the 30 day flow program, we do spins in this program but not right away. Also a lot of pole work doesn't require you to come towards the pole in away that would make sudden contact. If static spins aren't your thing, no big deal! I hardly do static spins myself :) Also you're not alone as far as bruising a lot, I know of many girls who bruise a lot, it's ok! The more you worry about something the bigger it becomes in your head and you end up gravitating towards the exact thing you were afraid of!!!
gina g · 10/6/2018
Thank you Runemist34 and Veena :) I really love your tips for flow and movement in the 30day flow program Veena. Thats actually the reason I started pole in the first place! ...i was wanting to learn how to move more fluidly and sensually I actually never really intended to learn any tricks, but *trick progression* seems to be what most studios offer (here in aust, at least). Yes, i think its just a matter of reminding myself why I started, and what I'm wanting to gain from my learning. Thanks again. g. xx

Your insights and advice needed re. *fear* of bruising

3 replies

Your insights and advice needed re. fear of bruising