Hi Shariya. Great topic. I've trained in both on and off for years and there is a definite difference but there is also a lot of similarities. It depends on which discipline of yoga you are doing - there are so many!
Ananda, Kripalu and Anusara yoga - very spiritual, focuses on breathing and posture, connecting to "spirit" or "divine energy".
Kali Ray TriYoga, Ashtanga and Power Yoga - a flowing series of movements and poses, focuses on improving circulation, flexibility and stamina. Very physicially demanding.
Intergral, Kundalini and ISHTA yoga - meditation, visualizations, focus is on energy and stress managment
Iyengar Yoga - focus is on strength, flexibility and balance. Poses are held for longer periods of time and props like cushions and straps are often used.
Bikram Yoga - uses a heated environment to improve circulation, flexibility and detoxification.
There are many more disciplines, but you get the idea - choose one which suits your goals, wether they be balance and coordination, strength and flexibility or psychological healing.
Personally I like a little bit of meditation and breathing exercises, but if the poses are too static I become bored and cold, I really like dynamic movements, where my body can really warm up and loosen up.
Pilates is more about building core strength and doesn't incooporate the spiritual/mental side. Depending on who your instructor is, you may focus on all major muscle groups by doing squats and lunges for hamstrings, quads and glutes, or you may just focus on strengthening spine and abdominals through leg raises, superman kicks and planks etc. I love pilates because its intense, you realy feel the workout and your muscles burn. Yoga can be a little too gentle and relaxing for me, but it depends what you want. If you want something clam and relaxing, go yoga. If you want something that will make your muscles sore the next day, go for pilates. Im not saying yoga isnt a great work out, but the emphasis is more on breathing, blanacing and stretching. Gosh its so hard to fully differentiate them though: both are about core stabilization, control and precision.
For pole dancing.... I think either will be beneficial, but try both at a few different places if you can. Sometimes the instructors can make it or break it.
What I am finding to be a fantastic workout especially in conjunction with pole is Acrobatics. Ive been doing it for two months now and LOVE it. We work on balance, contortion and power tricks, and I really feel my muscles becoming more powerful and strong. Highly recommend it!!!!!! :D