alexis, starting poling can be frustrating because you don't know if you are gonna improve and it gives you doubt. I promise you, you will get better, and you will progress. You just have to be okay with doing it wrong many times before you do it right. when learning any new move, I fail many many many times. don't let that discourage you. Also, I think the beginning stuff is the hardest. it is so different from anything you've ever done and you have nothing to compare it to. you don't know what to expect. that pole climb, sit, hold took me longer to learn than anything else! but once you get those basic moves, you have a good foundation and other tricks will probably come along a lot easier. just keep doing it! I was not able to comfortably do spins for 6-8 months into poling. I did not have the wrist, shoulder strength, and my body did not understand how to spin. I still struggle with spins sometimes and really I just don't like them that much and don't do them often. some things you will favor over others and that's fine. I started with zero strength and stamina. building my base strength to do those first sit,and climb took a lot of work but once I had those I had already built up so much strength. I highly recommend getting lessons here if possible. Veena's lessons really helped me to get those moves. I was going to a studio and I just wasn't getting it at the studio. I still go to a studio and use Veena's lessons. I am able to understand Veena's explanation better. I also go to a studio that I love, but I still use my lessons here. the lessons will give you direction and structure. there's no way I would try poling without some sort of lessons. I have all the lessons I could want and it is still very challenging . I couldn't imagine trying to figure it out on my own. It's just too dangerous if you don't know what you're doing. You don't suck. And if your tricks are sucking, it's okay and it's temporary. my tricks suck when I'm first learning them. I struggle through them, I even laugh at them. but it's the tricks that kinda suck or don't look right yet, not ME! tricks can always improve. there is nothing about you that sucks! you are doing one of the most challenging and fulfilling forms of dance anyone could have chosen. that makes you brave and bold and a bad ass!