PoLeNoViCe started this discussion ·
Does anyone have a partner who gets bothered about all the time spent on pole (poling, watching vids, Veena, posting on FB, pole clothes, etc...) or is it just my bf? lol!
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Mine has this sick sense of apathy about him towards it, like he could care less. But then he will turn around and get weird about it, like, worried about "why" Im learning it, "why" I dress this way...(same way for th past decade) But, our relationship isnt healthy anyways, so...
No ,it's not just your man!LOL!!I deal with it all the time!!
Hmm well mine is a little odd about the fact that I spend more time looking at poledancers and big boobs (I've wanted a boob job for years so I look at forums and stuff about that too) than he does, but I've yet to find out whether that's a good or bad kind of odd...
I spend a lot of time of my pole, a lot of time looking at pole youtube vids, I blog about pole dancing and I spent countless hours doing something related to pole dancing. My hubby is not bothered by it at all. We both have things are are addicted to. He's addicted to World Of Warcraft (so I am just a lil :p) and just playing video games in general. He's also addicted to Snowboarding and playing sports. We spend a lot of time doing our own thing yet still spend lots of time together. For example, one of our fun nights would be him gaming and me 5 feet away playing on my pole. We just live in harmony together and that's the way it should be. What we are both interested in is good for us as long as we can still live in harmony together. What exactly is your SO bothered by? I think it can be intimidating for a man to see his woman working hard at something, getting buff and becoming more self confident. lol.
Mine is the same way. He's fine with me taking classes/poling while he's gone (i.e. during the day) but we've had it out on poling after he's home. It's a recurring argument in our household.
Veena ·
Yeah, there are times when the husband does get jealous of all the dancing/vids I do for others. But when it gets to be night time I don't feel like dancing I'm tired and just want to rest! LOL He spends more time on FB that me so he can't complain about that!
Sometimes my husband has jokingly or not so jokingly said that pole dancing is ruining our marriage. He seems more chilled out lately. I think what it was is that with our crazy schedules, we don't see each other a lot (I work a day shift and he works a night shift), so he was really bothered when I was going to my class 2-3 times a week. I've now cut back to one class a week and got a home pole to practice on. As far as videos, my husband has straight up told me that I can't post any pole dancing videos. I'm personally hesistant too, because I'm concerned about people outside the pole community seeing them and getting the wrong idea. However, I told my husband that I had fantasized about doing videos with a mask, kind of zorro-style. He actually seemed cool with that. Maybe I'll try it some time.
nope, mine supports me 110%. We went to jamaica together to Dance Wicked in 2010 and will be going again in 2011. He watches the kids so I can go to Chicago and spend time with Empy, and Detroit for workshops. He never questions why I just have to have so and so's new video/s like Leigh Anns ones that came out on the 27th (woohoo to b'day money from my MIL for those). He actually wishes i had more time to spend actually poling. I work nights he works day and we have horses and kids to care for so finding poling time is hard. I just changed positions at work so I'm hoping since I now have a semi-set schedule that I will be able to fit in more time for poling at home. Above all he is my biggest fan and I never feel like I'm dancing as well as I do when I'm dancing for him ;)
im very new to pole dancing and my bf supports me 100% because i do it for the artistic side and to get in shape and for fun.
Jenn ·
Yeah, my bf was really supportive when I first got my pole, but then that didn't last long once he realized it wasn't about pleasing him, lol. We went through a phase where he would get really annoyed by it, but I was pretty obsessedand spending way too much time on the forums and youtube. Tbh, I was letting it interefere with our time together. Now, I have chilled out a lot, and everything i'd back to copacetic again.
I can't figure out how to quote people with the new format, but what Jenn said about her boyfriend being really supportive until he found out it wasn't about pleasing him - that is exactly how it was for me too. The idea of a stripper pole was all good, until the realization hit that I didn't get this for HIS benefit and pleasure. Then he got really jealous, really quick. Kinda laughable that he got so pissed over a metal object. I've also noticed a very direct correlation between his pole happiness or pole disdain - it is very dependent on whether or not he's "getting some" - but that's pretty much the case with everything in our life. If I am putting out, I can do no wrong LOL
My husband is totally supportive! In fact, his hobby--photography--and mind compliment each other nicely. I practice for me, but perform for him. He thinks he's the luckiest guy on earth!
Jemmie ·
I haven't started poling but my bf is a bit annoyed by all the time I spend looking up poling. Right now I just want to test that I know how to reply in forums (I can't find a "send" or "submit" button)
Jemmie ·
Ok great! I know how to reply! Yes, he doesn't say it but from how he is acting now I am SURE that he will get jealous if I spend a lot of time pole dancing in the future. He is trying to make it go on the back burner, saying how it won't be for the next 5 years blah blah when I have children I won't have time blah blah. If I call it anything more than a hobby he makes a joke out of it as if I'm unbelievable. And today he said I should belly dance instead.
I am very lucky, my fiancé is very supportive. He plays football and has his playstation and I pole. He has, for the last few days looked after our son and kept him occupied so I can really focus on the pole (my son is 8 months old, crawling and trying to walk so into anything and everything so he is exhausting to chase around and play with!) My previous boyfriend however was a jealous type and wouldn't let me pole dance because apparently it was only for sluts! Just one of the many reasons he is an ex! I think it is good to have different interests from your SO as long as you have some dedicated time together. That is what works for us anyway.
