Should I warn her? Advice please!

Lina Spiralyne started this discussion · 1/4/2013

Yesterday I ran into this vid on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpkOGtLsSAI Delayne is super cute contortion-kid and she’s kind of dedicating this vid to two people, one of them called “hamfist”. I cannot be 100% sure it is a man, but about 99.99%.... She states that he has written her the nicest email and that he has “changed her contortion life”. Obviously he has given her some instructions on what to do. I just get a somewhat creepy feeling from this. She’s 8 years old….I checked out hamfist’s channel and there are a few flexy kids among his likes. As it is now she seems to really enjoy what she’s doing but what if her friend starts to instruct her into things she wouldn’t do otherwise and maybe makes requests about what she should wear and so on? He could be a 45-year old guy… I was thinking that I should maybe write to her with some kind of warning but I’m not sure how to do it the best way. I really don’t want to scare her off youtube. That would be sad too. It’s not a bad thing to take requests in general, but again she’s 8 years old and I don’t think hamfist is another contortion-kid. Do you think I should message her or am I overreacting?

29 replies

Pole gal · 1/4/2013
At the start she says hamfist is the nicest female ever. Nit sure hat advice to give u tho Soz. x
chemgoddess1 · 1/4/2013
Don't get involved. I am sure she has people ine her life that are keeping an eye out. Remember, you are a total stranger too.
Pole gal · 1/4/2013
Oops Soz it says nicest email lol. Couldn't hear it as volume not great. x
luvlee · 1/4/2013
I see your concern but I hope she has parents! I wouldn't get involved. Of course I wouldn't let my 8 hr on yT either. Lol!!!
luvlee · 1/4/2013
Meant 8 yr old.
monica kay · 1/4/2013
i saw a disturbing contortion vid on youtube recently and regret not speaking up now. she kept doing these walkovers and her shirt kept coming down over her head and showing everything- she was probably 7 or 8 years old. There were a couple of comments from other viewers warning her about pedofiles, so i just left it at that. I wish i would have sent her a message suggesting she show her parents her videos before posting them, because I am certain she does not get their approval first. no parent would allow what i saw, and the video was total pedophile material i'm not sure if it's the right thing to do- get involved? dont get involved? i just know, (in my situation, at least) that I did not get involved and to this day, i kinda wish i had.
Cherished · 1/4/2013
I think anything showing an underaged child exposed as Katana described should be flagged. @Spir: This Hamfist does sound suspicious I guess if you really want to say something I'd probably just use the comment section instead of a private message and remind the little girl not to give out personal info and that anyone who is a nice person will not ask and if they do a parent should be told right away. I'm always coming across these types of vids when looking for dance ideas and stretches. Regularly when I look in the comments there are always a few who are most likely pedophiles. Ultimately it's the parents of these kids that need to be aware of what's going on and should be monitering their child's pc activity. However I personally don't think a subtle heads up is wrong in a case where an 8 year old is putting out videos that child predators have access to.
chemgoddess1 · 1/4/2013
And I would think nothing of a 7 or 8 years old shirt riding up. Nor would anyone in pretty much all of the European countries. When has it become okay to pass our hang ups onto to other's children? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lrdn4lazVBc
Cherished · 1/4/2013
I don't think it has anything to do with a hang up it's just common sense to me. I also would think nothing of a 7 or 8 year old's shirt riding up but youtube viewers are not limited to Europeans or people without ill intention. That doesn't mean I think kids should be locked in a box until they turn 18 but If I were to see comments below a video containing the material described that gave me the impression that 7 or 8 year old was being targeted by a pedophile I definitely think parents or no parents the child should be protected and I personally would be in favour of having the video removed. I've heard too many stories where a child needed help (some from adults I know personally recounting their past) but everyone felt they should just mind their own business and stay out of it and instead did nothing. Of course people shouldn't create panic and alarm especially when it comes to children but if there is concern I'm in support of taking time to assess a situation and acting after much consideration if necessary.
Cherished · 1/4/2013
lol I don't know why my comment is in showed up in a square but I was just sharing thoughts not anything beyond that!
jeansgina · 1/4/2013
I can't see any reason why not to advise her that she shouldn't give out personal details online. As for how to word it, I have no idea but I think using the comments box is the best way. I think a friendly helpful word is all you can do.
JeHanne · 1/4/2013
Lina Spiralyne, follow your internal compass. If you feel the urge to notify this young person by leaving a comment or sending a message, do so. If this will linger in your mind or you will later regret not saying something, say something. At least you would know that you did what you felt was right for your needs regarding what you observed. You are not responsible for what people do with the information but you can do what you feel is important to do. Wishing you the best in however you decide to approach it.
NonFlexy · 1/4/2013
I agree with JeHanne - There is nothing wrong that can come of you saying something. Notify her, and hope that she talks with her parents about it
Lina Spiralyne · 1/4/2013
Thanks for your replies girls:). I'm not sure yet if I'll leave her a comment or not, but now I'm subscribed to her channel so I won't miss what she will post. I didn't think that anything disturbing happened in the video while she did the contortion thing. Also I guess that any kid who jumps and flips around in shorts could unfortunately become pedophile material, not only if they do contortion, and there's not much to do about it. We cannot hide the kids, as someone pointed out in the comments. It's just that I don't want her to possibly be misled or used by someone who she have started to rely on. Maybe I should leave "hamfist" a comment instead to see if he knows anything about contortion. I actually saw now when I went through the feed on this channel that he has liked one of my own flexibility vids too. If he really has knowledge of these things, maybe from being one in his youth or from training kids in it, then I know who may be able to give me an advice or two if I'll need it:). Thanks again!
ShonaLancs · 1/4/2013
Follow your gut, send a message, it won't hurt anyone but it might help someone
ShonaLancs · 1/4/2013
I wouldn't mention the profile you're concerned about though because if it is dodgy she might tell them opening up a whole new world of manipulation
Madfelice · 1/5/2013
I like the idea of contacting hamfist. Ask him for advice on the video he has 'liked' and say you ask because someone you know told you they got some excellent advice from him. A white lie, but one that could show you whether or not he knows his stuff if he answers. Don't accuse or make it sound like an inquisition or anything, just sound him out. If he is giving unsolicited advice to children and ignores you, it is more likely your suspicions have some grounding. If he offers advice that is rubbish or inappropriate then again, red flag. If he knows his stuff, you might just learn something.
Lina Spiralyne · 1/5/2013
Exactly, I would not mention any names if I contacted any of the two and I would not make it sound accustative in any way.
Lina Spiralyne · 1/5/2013
*accusing, it's supposed to be I guess, not accusative:)
Cherished · 1/5/2013
Okay, I conducted some Hamfirst research! Here is someone on another site inquiring about him: http://contortionistsunite.ning.com/forum/topics/whos-hamfist The info from the above link leads to the name Ian North http://hamfist.mindsay.com/ Seems a little shady since he's singling out double jointed girls to contact him but I'm not a contortionist trainer and don't know what's normal or if there even is a general pattern when it comes to their interests ... the name leads to a contortionist in traingin using advice from an Ian North and thanking him for his help (the web page is dedicated to him and contains her online journal) http://www.angelfire.com/freak/contortion/journal.html I can't be sure if these are all the same person or if any of the info is even legit since this is all from a 5min google search but it's what comes up.
GeekStrength · 1/5/2013
You ladies are amazing! I haven't followed any of the links, but when reading this tread I was overwhelmed with the love and concern! The internet really is a "Wild West" but it's nice to see that some people still look out for each other and for the kids out there. I see both sides of this issue, and don't know what the "right" answer is. I think it's awesome that you would even think to be concerned.
Lina Spiralyne · 1/5/2013
Cherished...thanks for the reasearch. So obviously there is a real contortion trainer called hamfist but also a few fake ones. What a mess. I'm actually a member of contortionistsunite (to where your first link leads) so I may throw out a question and see if anyone knows if the channel I found on youtube is beloning to the real guy. It seems that this Ian is in New Zealand, but the youtube channel appears to be German (it says Kanal von hamfist) which would be weird for a New Zealander (if he hasn't moved).
moonflower · 1/5/2013
It's great that there are so many peopel here looking to take care of this girl. But I think I would be careful also not to ruin a man's life just incase he is innocent. This man may look suspicious to onlookers but may not be malicious. A label like "pedo" can completely ruin a man forever. People tend to band together and attack before they are willing to hear him out. I've witnessed a scene at a park where a man was called a pedophile for helping a girl up after she fell. A group of moms basically converged on him, saying things like since he is at a park with no kids, it must mean he is there is perv. They basically told him to leave and if they saw him at the park again they would call the police. They claim that the park was for peopel with children or children only. And here I was an adult with no kid, playing on the monkey bars...but they never attacked me because I am a woman. It was sexist to jump to conclusion just because someone it male. It makes me very happy to know that there are people out there willing to look out for a child of 8. Look into it, but please be careful. On another note, I second what chemmie said! There is NOTHING wrong with a 7-8 year old girl going showing her chest or even going topless. Goodness, when I was 7-8 I changed my top in public because I fell into mud. Nothing wrong with that 20 some odd years ago, why is it wrong NOW? There is nothing to see. Making a big deal of it will MAKE IT a taboo thing.
Cherished · 1/6/2013
Just to clarify, since I'm seeing caps whipped out lol, no one here has said there is anything wrong with a topless child only that there is something wrong with how they are viewed by certain individuals. Also I understand how easily a witch hunt on an innocent person can occur but I don't think anyone here is rushing to vilify Hamstring. It was already established that he is most likely a legitimate contortionist trainer who has a few people impersonating him (no idea what that's all about) but anyway rest assured it's unlikely there will be a mob of angry pole dancers assembling on his lawn (in New Zealand) with pitchforks and torches anytime soon! Well I might go but it's only because it's starting to look like this guy can help me get into a good needle scale.
Lina Spiralyne · 1/6/2013
Don't worry, no rush or hunt from my side and not from anyone else either I'm sure. I think we've all heard stories about how the perv-label can ruin for someone.

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