dottywine started this discussion ·
As a black dancer, this is something I am always a bit self-concious about. I recently cut off my relaxed hair in favour of growing it out completely natural. It's short. It's kinky. It's black. It's the opposite of what counts as "sexy". Should I opt to wear a wig?
Sign in or create a free account to reply.
Do what makes you most comfortable but I think it's up to you to make it sexy. If you want to wear the wig maybe you can do it until your hair grows out a bit so you can do pretty "twist outs" or something. I've seen black women with really short haircuts and they were just oozing sex appeal. I remember when I cut my relaxer off and had just started to loc my hair......the most compliments that I got were from men. Regardless, I know how you feel because "black hair" is not really considered sexy or beautiful by most people--not even in the black community. It's a winner to me🌸 Browse through youtube. There are TONS of videos of women who have done their "big chop" and they give tips on products and styles. I'm not a big makeup fan but maybe you can even play up your eyes with some lashes and liner for a really exotic look. Hope this helps.❤️
ItsEss ·
I'm natural myself. And I LOVED wigs before I even made that decision 2 years ago. Wigs are a great option (especially for protective styling) but you need to be comfortable in them to pull it off. Just make sure you have bobby pins for those inverts! But anyways, I did find that it was harder to feel sexy with short hair. And it really showed in my dancing. Videos I have with straight hair just ooze sexy in my movement. I later figured that it was not having hair movement when doing "hair flips and head rolls" (they look crazy on me w/o some movement). So I tried my big "Kelly Rowland" natural-style big afro curly-kinky wig and noticed my dancing was SO SEXY. It also help hide my face a little too so you couldn't see all the ackward faces I sometimes make when dancing. So I say all that to say. You are probably just missing your "hang time". Pin point exactly what it is and go from there. B/c if you don't FEEL sexy, it won't be sexy.
Desirae ·
I had cut my hair really low as well. I died it honey blonde, got a nice liner, make up, nice earrings and confidence. The Men love natural beauty as well. I am growing locks now but then and now I used hair accessories. Youtube to the world!!! I love wigs. If you wear one, don't be afraid to be natural the next day. Wigs are fun. Check out elevatestyles.com
JeHanne ·
I love Natural hair and ladies (and gents) that rock it! My natural hair dreads easily so that is what I work with now. I get many compliments on my hair but honestly I feel it comes from me embracing my hair's unique beauty. Define your own Sexy, don't let another's standards dim your light. Expirement and find what works best for you but always remember the hair you were born with IS beatiful. As is the hair that you create though different styles, colors and accessories. It may take some time to cultivate that inner acceptance but it is so worth it.
Not a black woman here, I just wanted to say I LOVE LOVE LOVE natural black hair. I think it's mighty sexy - short or long. I'm sorry if I'm being inappropriate or anything. I just don't understand how anyone could dislike a feature as breathtaking and amazing as this type of hair. Off I go now, sorry...
keex ·
I think it's up to us to re-invent the definition of sexy; especially in a world when "freakin' the fro" doesn't fit into what the mainstream views as hot. I say we rock the natural whether we've got cute little kinks, winding twists, spiraling coils or lovely locks. Just as in pole dancing, sexy is our ability to embody who we are, embrace our individuality and engage the world with confidence. Sexy comes from within. (Spoken from a sista with a big ol' fro of curly curls whose hair remains motionless during head rolls. LOL)
Fuck conventional ideas of beauty. I'm so over the idea that there is an "ideal" way to look. You might like my blog post from last week, seems relevant to this post. <a href http://houseofcherry.wordpress.com/2012/07/25/dont-hate-us-because-were-beautiful-all-of-us/ ;
Not sure why the link didn't work but here it is again. http://houseofcherry.wordpress.com/2012/07/25/dont-hate-us-because-were-beautiful-all-of-us/
Anonyma ·
felix have short hair....it doesnt take her sexiness away
Thanks for posting this. I decided a few months ago to stop relaxing my hair and have been wearing in twist outs ever since. My husband LOVES it (he is Latino, btw) so much more than my relaxed hair. I was just thinking the other day how much I missed hair wips, tossing my hair, letting it fall in my face. Maybe a long wig when I dance would be fun. I started thinking "oh, the long straight hair is sexy", but stopped myself. I'm STILL sexy, same old Tricia, just with a new hair do. Being exactly who you are is SEXY. Rock it, ladies!
And for the record, LillyBilly - no need to apologize for placing your opinion. I have a friend who is a blue eyed strawberry blonde who keeps telling me how jealous she is of my curls and she wishes she could grow a fro! I think it's a trait ALL women have - we always check out and wish we could test what other girls have. Straight hair wants curly, tall wants to be short . . . even if just to see what it's like for a minute! But back to my originial point, thank you for your appreciation. I've had a love/hate relationship with my hair since childhood.
I really think it is a personal preference and you should go with the hair do that you feel happy, confident and comfortable with. I was totally a braids girl for over 20 years, I LOVED my braids, it was my thing and people always talked about how much they loved me in braids. However, I was in a bad accident 2 years ago and lost most of my hair due to PTSD. It wasn't growning back either, so I started wearing wigs about a year ago. At first, I hated the idea of wigs (I didn't want to be seen as the stereotypical black girl who wore a wig or weave) but now I love wearing them because I can do a short hairstyle one week and long luxurious the next week or I can wear a curly, kinky wig when I am feeling "sassy". Recently though, I fell in love with short pixie wigs, so that's what I have been sporting. I invert and everything in the wigs with no problems, I just make sure the adjustment strap is at the tightest setting inside the wig before I pole and I haven't lost it once. The only time I feel it shift a little is if I do a shoulder roll or something during floorwork where my head sort of drags on the ground and pulls the wig with the movement. I love natural hair dos though if and when my hair starts to grow back, I will definitely probably go with something short and natural :) @brownsfantricia my hubby is latino too and he also likes when I wear my hair natural ;) he doesn't care for all the wigs, weaves and relaxers either.
