Thanks for starting this discussion thread. I've been interested in what you all have had to say so far. I want to start sharing my opinion on this subject by reviewing a dialogue had with a friend while dining together at our favorite Chinese restaurant.
Refering to the song playing on the radio, "Wasted" performed by Carrie Underwood, I made the statement, "I think I really want to dance to this song."
"THIS song?" Nikki replied, confused.
"Yes, why not?"
Still trying to understand, Nikki asked, "So do you just really like Country music a lot, or what?"
"No, not generally, but this particular song moves me for some reason. I think it would interpret well in a dance."
"But you can't dance to this!"
"Why not?"
And then it came out. Nikki replied, "because it isn't sexy!"
So then I went there. "Why should that matter? Why should I have to be sexy?"
"Well.... because you're on a pole!"
I will admit to being irritated by that dialogue. Personally, I don't find it terribly distasteful to be thought capable of erotic movement, but because Nikki is my friend I have wanted her to be able to understand that pole dancing for me is a type of acrobatic performance, rather than erotic entertainment. The attitude I have toward pole dancing would place poles in circuses rather than in sexual types of environments. I personally do have respect for exotic dancers. I consider them artists of a sort. Its easy to have charisma when you feel wanted by droves of attractive and charming people. To remain charismatic while marketing oneself to drunken, lonely, chauvenistic and potentially obnoxious individuals takes a high degree of skill and self-control. Mind you, I'm sure there are some clubs where a higher callibre of individual is in attendance; but in general, I think the likelihood of going into a gentleman's club and finding an actual "gentleman" are probably not particularly high. But I digress.
I aspire toward a pinnacle of physical virtuosity. This is not so I can be beautiful, it's so that I can be efficient in athletic and acrobatic types of performances. Should I, at some point, choose to consciously integrate sexuality into my work on the pole, or any other performance medium, the sexuality is merely a decoration. For me, sex and pole are about as connected as pine trees are with blown glass bulbs. People put bulbs on trees, but there is no innate connection between them. I think connecting poles with sexuality makes about as much sense as connecting sexuality with radiators, tennis balls, or lemons. In one of Amcut's video's I saw her use part of her wall/countertop in a way that looked pretty damned hot. But speaking just for myself, it doesn't seem that it would be logical to consider all walls to possess erotic qualities just because someone looked fantastic when using it as part of some sensual movement.
Any medium can be used for purposes of erotica, whether in private or in performance. Chairs are sometimes used in exotic dance, but how many of us have been asked if we are strippers just because we've been seated in a chair? Food can be used in a way that is sexy. Music can be used to entertain in an erotic way, as easily as it can be used for other kinds of entertainment.
On the converse side of this, really any activity could be considered sexually exciting by someone, and it doesn't have to be an erotic performance done scantily clad. High school, college, and professional athletes can tend to be labeled "players" in their personal lives as the result of their sexual prowess. I'm sure we all remember some of these personalities from our own time in school, our team positions, or by looking at tabloids and gossip television programmes. But even though sports such as football do not contain an inherently erotic element in them, there appears to be something about competitive sports that generates a charisma that many women and perhaps some men seem to find very sexually exciting. The same can be said of musical performances. Many singers, guitarists, and other musicians are highly coveted sexually, even though their musical stylings, attire, and movements may not be overtly sexual in performance. Why is this? My theory is that there is a particular kind of glory projected on performers and athletes of different kinds, and there is something in us that understands that by engaging the recipient of that projection in a sexual way, we are somehow increasing our own sense of self and collective value and partaking in a piece of that other person's glory ourselves. This glory can be carried equally well by a political leader, a medical pioneer, a goalie on a hockey team, a celebrity chef, an animal rescuer, or a pole dancer. We all want to partake of the power, strength, grace, mercy, money, beauty, charm, genius, expressiveness, and creativity of others; and at least to a limited degree, sex and sexuality enable us to do that. But when we do, I think it is important to remember that it is often we who are projecting the sexuality on something we value in that other person, rather than experiencing a sexual feeling directly which would be based on physical, emotional, or intellectual attraction and chemistry.
The last time I did a public pole dance performance, I selected music that could be considered somewhat macabre, and tried to choreograph in a way that communicated a similar feeling. I was furious at the DJ who did not prepare the music as I had paid him weeks in advance to do, because I had to improvise a performance to a song I had never heard before. Even though the performance was successful, I was livid, mainly because I didn't get to express myself how I desired to. I feel that as a pole dancer, if I would like to express erotic feelings through my music, I absolutely have the right to do that. Likewise, I feel quite entitled to express melancholy, anger, jollity, childishness, despair, remorse, reverie, respect, or whatever other feeling I would like to express. My hope as a pole dance performer is that whatever audience I end up in front of will recognise and appreciate the emotion I'm trying to express by movement and song selection, rather than doing one of the following: either experiencing that performance as having to do something with sexuality, or criticising the performance because it wasn't sexy enough.
This, like so many other issues, just comes down to preference. When I competed in a talent show in November, I pole danced and I felt like I very successfully pulled off some erotic movement. This was so that I could garner the audience response that I would need in order to win. But when I gave my follow-up performance to collect the rest of my prize money the next time that show was held, I selected a song that I didn't feel sexual about and choreographed in a way that I didn't feel was sexual, because I wasn't "competing" and didn't have to impress anyone. If I have to use sex to sell my pole dancing, I'm willing to do that. But if I can avoid it, I would prefer to.
I appreciate pole dancers like Kym, who wears sneakers in her pole performances, and Barbara that won Pole Superstar, who did that performance barefooted. I love the videos taken from Jenyne's master classes on her UK tour, and did not feel remotely deprived that she didn't wear high heel shoes for those performances; and in fact I thought it made her lines look straighter and cleaner. I find heels distracting and liable to subtract something from the performance. The hypocrisy which can be found in pole dancing never ceases to amaze me. We demand first to be recognised as athletes and fitness enthusiasts instead of strippers, and then in performance we adhere rigidly to traditional strip-club style dancing, performing many of the exact same dance moves that can be seen on any day in any strip club. I am okay with being thought of as a stripper firstly because I respect strippers and secondly because even if I did have a problem with being thought of that way I know that isn't what I'm doing. I suspect that many people who are successful pole dancers have fantasies or fetishes of being a stripper. But its hard for me to respect someone demanding to be recognised as an athlete who orgasmically wiggles around on the floor in string and heels. But then I must admittedly make some note of hypocrisy in my own statement here, because if I'm trying to help to divorce poles from strippers in the minds of the people I interact with, it is unfair of me to say that specific kinds of attire and dance moves are typical of strippers just because strip clubs are the specific location where those dance moves are usually performed and that attire is worn. I suspect it's possible that what we're really doing is bringing the strip club out of the gutter and into daylight, and lending some legitimacy to what it offers.
Having said all of that, I want to express that I am equally skeptical of the "pole fitness" fad. I personally do not use pole dancing as a way to keep myself fit, even though I recognise that it is one of the results. I am definitely not on the pole fitness bandwagon, though. I pole dance as a means of aerial performance. I keep fit in order to be more effective as a pole dancer, rather than pole dancing for fitness. To me, it seems as though the pole fitness crowd has polarised itself against the erotic pole performance crowd. I fall into neither category, as far as I can tell. But I am convinced that the more adamant one is about pole dancing for fitness, the greater the anxiety is present with regard to ones own sexuality. Quite often the pole fitness nazis are among the seediest movers on the floor, as far as I have observed. The remainder seem to be unattached to any particular philosophy about pole, but merely express their love for this art through sharing their dances. Of course one has to acknowledge that one develops a stronger and healthier body as the result of being on the pole, but I find it hard to believe that this is the primary motivation for most pole enthusiasts.
Last, but quite related, I'm slightly disturbed by some recent comments on one of my videos on YouTube. I do find it ironic that I received two comments in less than a week inquiring if I was gay because I posted a pole dance video, which I didn't think was sexual at all, homo or otherwise. Its funny how people want to tack sexuality onto everything. When I started wearing occasional black eyeliner and got my ears pierced, I felt like I had to defend against the same line of questions with the same types of answers.
http://www.youtube.com/comment_servlet?all_comments&v=jZ8Whz5wLSo
In this dialogue, I felt as though it was necessary to defend pole dancing from being called "gay" rather than being called stripping. After all this time, we are still a pretty misunderstood lot. What else can we do besides pray for these poor people?
I know that was really long-winded. I had no idea all that was about to come out! Do forgive me for writing another novel!
I have to confess, though... if I were a little less afraid of being perceived as sexual when I do a performance or a recording, I have to imagine my routines would be more danceworthy and flowy, and a bit less trick-after-trick-after-trick. I have always been apt to admit that (pole-related) dancing is not my strong suit; I find the acrobatics a lot easier and this may be part of the reason.
