parents; HOW ARE BABIES MADE

quancutie23 started this discussion · 3/20/2014

Quanesha Hidethekids 2 minutes ago A sweet lil 5 yr old ask me how a baby gets in your tummy. And I told her she has to be blessed with a seed from a very special person and that seed grows up to be big like her with 5 fingers on her hands two legs and arms eyes, long hair beautiful eyes and a joyful personality. Lil 5 yr old. Ooh ok Me. :) I don't have children so I had no idea what to say on that topic And this was a friend of a friends lil girl. So I hope I did ok. Parents out there how did you answer this question

11 replies

Meg Smith · 3/20/2014
My best friends 7 year old asked me i said "Ask your Mum" hahaha - So you did better the me!! I have got a nearly 3 year old daughter and she says she 'Popped out mummy's tummy' she is yet to ask how she got in! Would like to point out a 4 full days established labour was certainly NOT 'Popping out' hahaha :-D I think what i will say/how i will word it will all depending on the age she is when she does ask me x
dustbunny · 3/21/2014
I don't have children either but I think you did fine. I don't think it's okay to go into specific details about sex and pregnancy with someone else's child, that's their business to decide when they think is the right time. But I also don't think it's good to lie to them either. I think for her age you struck a very good balance of being both honest and discreet.
quancutie23 · 3/21/2014
Thanks I try to put the baby Jesus story on it. Baby Jesus story is always innocent and gets straight to the point. Every child is a blessing and it takes incredible people to make babies
Webmaster · 3/21/2014
Veena and I have four children, so I would like to provide a parent's perspective. If someone who is not your child asks about anything related to sexuality your best answer is always "that is something you should ask your mom or dad" The question of sexuality is an ongoing and evolving discussion in any family unit. It can be quite sensitive and anything you say could either set that back or accelerate it beyond where the family is at that point. I can tell that you tried to be sensitive to the issue and question at hand but it is a tremendously dynamic issue with pacing concerns and maturity issues to be aware of. Only a child's parent is positioned to make decisions on what the appropriate answer to children under middle school age is.
Ava Madison · 3/21/2014
I completely agree with Webby - having two children myself the only appropriate answer to that (or any other religious/political/sensitive/personal question) is "that is something to speak with your parents about". I expect it from the people who are in my children's lives, whether that be family or friends, and give that courtesy to every parent in our lives.
quancutie23 · 3/21/2014
Thanks everyone. I was shocked when she asked me Im not around kids often so im out of practice so next time I will say ask your mom. But I did tell her mom she seemed cool about my responds and confused her daughter ask me. Because her daughter witness the growth of her baby sister and never asked her how babies are made
Lydia Addams · 3/21/2014
I like the answer Mayim Bialik gave on The Talk. When her children asked her, she explained gametes in terms they could understand. A mommy cell and a daddy cell meet to make baby cells that divide and grow into a baby. One child asked how the mommy and daddy cells meet, and instead of having to answer, her other child piped in with "I bet I know. At a wedding!" Explaining babies does not necessarily mean having to explain sex. ;)
Webmaster · 3/21/2014
Miss Anthrope, the potential for it to be about sex is the problem. You never know which direction a conversation with a child will go and at what point you'll have to commit to an answer or backpedal. You also can not know where any child is in this conversation with their parents. Too many unknowns with children makes this dangerous ground. I will reiterate, as a parent, I would certainly hope anyone would refer my child to me rather than even attempting to answer. I think most parents would STRONGLY agree with me.
Lina Spiralyne · 3/21/2014
I think Webmaster's suggestion of an answer is really good. Seriously, I don't think I had thought of that option before. I'm not around children much (and don't have any of my own) and haven't gotten the question, but earlier I would probably have said something like "you'll learn about that later", which may not be a satisfactory reply for a child. It's perfect because it will both save you from the uncomfortable situation and you won't risk to make up something that contradicts something that has possibly already been brought up in some way in the family.
Mechie · 3/27/2014
Totally not topic related...but I never knew Webmaster is Veena's hubby...and I'd been on Veena for more than 2 years...LOL You learn something new everyday... Actually...this topic is good...cause my sister recently had a baby girl...if this topic ever comes up...I'll just point finger to her mommy and said "Ask her"...lol
Veena · 3/27/2014
LOL yep, he's my husband! I agree with telling the child (if it's not yours that they should ask their parents. :)