My sister told my son to get off the pole!

krystalgem85 started this discussion · 6/17/2009

So I am kinda upset because my sister told Felipe to get off the pole cause he is not a girl. What! 😠 I taught him how to spin properly just so he doesn't hurt himself he is 5. I do not believe there is anything wrong with him playing on the pole and she really pissed me off. She is all about telling him girls can do anything but she told him he shouldn't play on it? I know she is kinda weird about it anyway but that really got me upset. Sorry had to vent. I have always been one to try new things and open myself to diversity but I really feel like she is being so closed minded

11 replies

RoxyPink · 6/17/2009
What business does your sister have telling YOUR son to get off of YOUR pole?? Plenty of boys/men pole and they have just as much right to do it as we do! Try showing her some of Jungle Cats or Joel (poledancefan) vids!
azriel · 6/17/2009
It really sucks when those close to us can't see pole-dancing the way we do, let alone teaching YOUR kids to see it THEIR way! I'm sure she loves & cares about her nephew & just doesn't want him to get negative reactions at some point in his life, but that's not fair for her to contradict what you've been teaching him! And i totally hear ya about the double-standard thing. How can you preach that women should be able to do things that men do without getting stereotyped or labeled, but not have that same belief for men?? Personally, i would tell her to keep her opinions to herself & let you decide what is ok for your kids to do. 🥂
Chream · 6/17/2009
okay I agree I think that is really closed minded. I applaud your diversity and think you are a great mom for keeping your son involved in activity no matter what kind. I get sick of people placing stereotypes on who can pole dance or who pole dances. Great for you and your son. I say continue to have fun and stay open minded and diverse your life and you son's life will be great and full of wonderment 😀
untamedshrew · 6/18/2009
It's so hard to raise kids to be open minded when those around you aren't! My mother intentionally contradicts me because she thinks I'm "ruining" my sons by teaching them what I value. She takes them to Walmart every chance she gets because we don't shop there (unfair labor practices, slave wages, ungreen, etc). Her husband says racist and homophobnic things in front of them because "they need to know how to protect themselves". They call my spiritual ideas nonsense (atheist zen buddhist), buy them all the crap they think I don't give them enough of (videos, movies, weapons, sugar, fat) . They threatened to call CPS when I took them to a peace rally (those dang pacifists are so dangerous!). I've had run ins with teachers because they've (illegally) singled out one of my sons when he's refused to do things against his beliefs. That same son has been teased and ridiculed because he doesn't "stay in the closet" with his values. His twin just pretends to agree with everyone, and my oldest refuses to discuss things with people. I just remind my kids that people have all different kinds of ideas and beliefs and they should do whatever they feel comfortable with regardless of others' opinions. They each handle it their own way. Got kinda rambly, it's just I get so frustrated becuse there are so many things "the majority" finds unacceptable! 😈 😈 Just remeber that as open minded people, we have to try to be open to understanding the minds that are closed. They're just scared of things that are different. We should pity them actually because they miss out on so many wonderful things! 🌸
amcut · 6/18/2009
LAME. I just got SO PISSED reading your reply, Untamed! I'd so spank your mom. SPANK HER. She'd only get off easy because she's your mom. You want to make kids that are being raised to do things in a very tasty and commendable way not so tasty and commendable? Her husband, I'm going to give him a -whoopin-. He's not related, so he gets the dinner portion. It's especially difficult to alter your lifestyle to match your beliefs, so I SUPERCOMMEND YOU FOR DOING IT. I'm also spanking your sister, Krystal. Oh yeah. Think she's going to tell your son what to do when you've already said he could? Oh noes! SPANK HER. Luckily, most women have a cringe-factor for any kind of beautiful dance, so it's probably not -just- pole dance. I bet if you signed him up for ballet, we'd have the same response. Something about a man being lovely that just makes some intestines turn. Just thinking about the potential people who will try to undermine my good sense in parenting makes me think about the spankings and whoopins I'll have to dole out as a mother.
untamedshrew · 6/18/2009
Amcut- I love you!! 😀 You can so kick both their @$$es! I haven't spoken to either of them for about 2 years. Long story, but basically mom's husband is an emotionally abusive dry drunk. They see the kids regularly by going through my ex husband (which is funny because he wasn't even welcome in their house). I hate that they still have an influence on the kids, but the kids love them. What kid wouldn't enjoy unlimitted junk food, videos and no toothbrushing? Big thanks for the commendation, there are times I wonder if I'm setting my kids up to be ostracized by teaching them to think for themselves and not go along with the herd. They really hate the tofu too! You're gonna make a great bad@$$ momma lion protecting her kids! 💪 Peace. 🌸
Hockey_Soldier · 6/21/2009
in all things child rearing and marriage: YOU ARE ALPHA FEMALE! Your mate, your house, your kids, your rules or YOURE (meaning your sister) GONE! WHy have something in the house that kids arent allowed to play with?! Thats like those living rooms you feel uncortable just walking through. Heaven forbid your kids have a happy environment in the courtesy of your house where they can play! If its going to be in the house it had better not be off limits. Just unrealistic for people with kids. Don't know your family so I'm not touching any of the issues behind your sister's retarded worldveiw.
Katrin_de_Larsen · 6/25/2009
I totally disagree with your sister. pole is the best trainer ever. just take a look at this vid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzy6f-9zc3g&feature=channel_page and there are a lot more male pole practice. Looks so full of strength. beautiful as for me.my boys enjoyed x-pole too, it's fun for kids. why not? some people still think that poledancing = striptease.poor thing 🙄
Former member · 7/21/2009
its so hard when people so close to us don't understand the things we love isn't it?? my aunt and i don't speak anymore because of it.....*le sigh*. i hope so much though krystal that you resolved the issue with your sister and that your son is back on the pole!! 🙂 xoxo
faerie_wench · 8/23/2009
There are men that do acrobatics on poles. Here is a vid of one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJVO3UCN9FU Tell your sister to stuff a sock in it
Jonnie · 9/8/2009
Just read this thread, pisses me off about racism and closed mindedness. If its not hurting anyone then why has your sister said something to your son. Its making him stronger, shame she cnt see passed her own mental walls. I reckon just allow people to do whatever they want, without imposing anything on you. walk your own paths, and enjoy the views. as for the video of the little chinese guy im well impressed with that. 🐷 oink oink.