adAstra started this discussion ·
There are even pole comics about how our partners lose interest in the sight of us in sexy little pole shorts and tops--this is not an experience I've encountered yet. Actually... that's how we got pregnant, LOL! Anyone else notice this? We are a pretty equally matched set of pervs as we like to say so maybe it's just me? hehehe 😉
Sign in or create a free account to reply.
Haha, I've heard my husband talk with his male friends about the early days of my pole hobby - "I'd have my wife and a few of her friends in my living room wearing barely anything and dancing on the pole, and I'd just grab a beer and say 'You have fun, ladies, I'll be in the basement.'" He's pretty desensitized to the sexiness of it. But he was never a strip-club-goer or anything. We have the great privilege of being friends with Danielle Tillie and she'd been poling for a couple years before I ever started, so hearing her talk about it and seeing her videos meant he was pretty "meh" about the sexy factor by the time I got into it. In a way it's kinda sad because I'd like to dance for him, but know already that it won't get him hot the way I'd want it to. We're both pretty pervy too, but all the perversion has been stripped from pole in our house, it's just what I do to exercise. Eh, we still have a healthy sex life so I guess it doesn't matter, but I've definitely experienced what you're talking about with the lost interest.
My husband and I were just talking about this lol My hubby is an ass man so he loves the little booty shorts & grabs my butt or grabs me for a passionate kiss when I am prancing around in my pole shorts--which is pretty much all the time lol But as far as being desensitized by my pole work, yep that's my husband. He will be intrigued & watch when I am working on a new trick(especially ones I am struggling with) or working on my booty popping (again, ass man lol) but for the most part, he could care less. Truthfully though, I actually dont like him watching me too often because when he is paying attention he is too much of a drill sergeant lol he'll be like arch your back more, why are you holding your breath? why are you making that face?, you do not have a good enough leg/knee pit lock with that move that's why you're falling out of it, you need to work on your stretching, so you can get into move that easier etc. When I ask for his help or advice fine but when I don't ask for it, I just want him to sit there & not pay attention to me lol so I can actually practice in peace! When we go to strip clubs we still find pole dancing sexy but on a different level...& we definitely give more props & pay more attention to gals who do pole work because we know all the hard work, pain, sweat & tears that goes into it!
luvlee ·
With me, when I practice, it is mainly moves. He does not notice this much unless needed to be a spotter. I am working out. LOL!!! Now, if I do a dance for warm up or routine, he gets more interested in that. I wouldn't say Bob is desensitized from it, but there is a difference in working out on the pole trying for moves and dancing, especially if you are dancing for THEM!!!!!
Lee, funny that you make that distinction. Shawn has flat-out told me that he finds transitions and floorwork boring to watch. He's really only impressed by impressive tricks, and even then, he wants to see the trick, not the whole dance it belongs to. Well, if you ask me, most tricks themselves aren't super sexy, it's the motions you put between them that set the mood for the dance. Some exceptions, maybe, like a V-leg Teddy or something that shows off flexibility like a straight Jade, because some guys just like to think about how far they can make a woman bend in bed, But like, Scorpio? Meathook? Janeiro? Impressive, sure, but not giving any instant boners I don't think! ;)
luvlee ·
Oh yeah! Agreed! Bob likes tricks, but practicing them, sweating, cussing, and falling is the beginning of a trick for me. He is not interested. LOL!!! I actually fell on my knee half on the carpet and half in the metal base of the pole last night. It was terribly painful. The mat came out after...
I think in the beginning when I first started poling, it certainly appealed to my husband on a basic level (as in, my girlfriend is learning to do the sexy things that strippers do, awesome). But as time went on it took on different meanings. First of all, he finds athletic women very sexy - he's captivated by women like Jenyne Butterfly. Who isn't? So he finds the muscles I'm developing from pole dance, as well as the newfound grace and agility, very appealing. I think he is turned on by the fact that his wife can do pole tricks, not by the actual performance of them but the fact that I have the requisite muscles to do it. He also thinks confidence and happiness is sexy (of course!) and pole gives me those things, so he finds it sexy to see me enjoying myself in an activity. The actual "sexy" moves - sexy floorwork, etc - are different. I love watching other dancers doing them, and I know we both appreciate that type of pole dance as much as the more balletic type, if not more so. But I find it very hard to do sexy, seductive moves with a straight face. I just can't do booty pops and leg splays for an audience without cracking myself up because I've never thought of myself as anything but an awkward white girl. So that kills any kind of showgirl fantasy potential. I guess I need to work on my poker face! Whenever we go to strip clubs together, I always tip girls who trick. It's fun and we usually end up talking about pole dance once they learn what I do. And I always tip anyone just for taking the time to talk to me instead of another paying client!
