frustrated with life

HellOnHeelsNH started this discussion · 9/17/2013

I'm so sad and frustrated :( Looking at another winter without proper heat in my house...when I talk to the landlord, the excuse has been the same the last 2 years... "I don't have the money"... Here is my problem...they are supposed to be my friends, if i hold my rent and demand the fix I'm the bad guy, I'm taking money from them and their kids... I'm not trying to be an asshole I just want my heat to work and not have my bedroom at 40 degrees when i get home from work... Don't ever rent from friends people.....biggest mistake ever.... Need to make major changes here... :'(

17 replies

AlphaKilo · 9/17/2013
I don't mean to sound like an asshole here but they are taking advantage of the fact you guys are friends. Clearly you're a reliable tenet and pay your rent so what I fail to understand is in the past 2 years you have lived there why haven't they set money aside that you have been paying them to get the heater fixed. This is poor money management on their part. You're not taking from their kids, they are the parents you have no responsibility to them to make sure their kids are taken care of (sorry if this sounds heartless, I am a mom, but I am smelling bullshit here on their part). When you enter into an agreement where money is exchanged especially when renting it is a business deal regardless if you know the person on a personal level. I suggest you tell them to fix the heat problem or you will and you will take the money you give them for rent to pay to get it fixed and they will be shit out of luck in rent. I know how cold it can get in the New England area and coming to a 40 degree house is unacceptable.
chemgoddess1 · 9/17/2013
There are laws to protect you. I would suggest setting up an escrow though the courts and they can have the rent monies only after they provide you with liveable conditions. This way you are covered if they try to evict you for non payment.
Webmaster · 9/17/2013
Do you have a lease? Is there a formal agreement between you and your friends or is this a we have an extra room and you need a place to stay type agreement?
Runemist34 · 9/17/2013
I agree with Webmaster- do you have a lease? Or can you give your notice when you want to? Personally, I've done the house with no heat, I've done the "trying to deal with it" thing, and it sucks. You're human, and there are certain things you need! Shelter is something that is meant to protect us from the elements, and that includes cold. As landlords to ANYONE, they need to know their responsibilities, and one of them is to provide you with a working, proper home if you are their tenant. If your refrigerator were to break, would it just be "Oh, we don't have the money for a new one"? As nice as your place may be, as kind as your friends are, or any other reason you have to stay... I think that you should look into moving elsewhere. I know, moving sucks (I'll be moving for the 3rd time this year, soon), but you need a place that works for you, provides you what you need, and that you feel safe and comfortable in.
Webmaster · 9/17/2013
Your rights as a tenant and your friends responsibilities as a landlord derive almost entirely from a properly executed lease. Without this lease, in most states, you are a friend sharing a house and helping with expenses.
Runemist34 · 9/17/2013
Webby, do the cities laws not state that, if one is owning a house, it must stay above freezing temperature? I know that, up here in Canada, we have to keep our homes properly insulated, if not heated, because if the pipes freeze they can screw up the pipes connected to them. Thus, the city must dig them up and replace them. It's part of the landowner's responsibility to keep an eye on it. But, you are correct... being just a friend sharing a house and helping with expenses, rather than a tenant with a lease, negates much of the rights and responsibilities one would normally expect :/
Webmaster · 9/17/2013
Property condition rules are generally tied to mortgages, insurance, and rental law. In general if you own and occupy a home you can do with it as you will. In short, if you want to allow your pipes to freeze and you are not endangering anyone but yourself that is your decision.
poledanceromance · 9/17/2013
Law student here. You might not need a lease for this issue. One of the most basic protections in landlord/tenant law is the warranty of habitability, and a majority of courts have found heat to be a part of that. Moreover you wouldn't have to have a written lease to legally qualify as a tenant for these purposes. As a month-to-month tenant the law may not require you to have a written lease because that agreement is not subject to the Statute of Frauds (a requierement that some contracts be written down). If you wanted to and had the resources, you could take him to court and have a good case. If you won, you could potentially get a court order that would force him to install working heat, as well as potentially a legal remedy I.E. money. However taking him to court for that would probably cost you more in financial resources and time than it would take you to find someplace else to live. I know that's not what you want to hear, but while you might win in court this really is one of those situations where it may be easier for you to find something else. If you are near any colleges, you can often find graduate or serious undergraduate students who want to share living expenses on Craigslist or other local rental websites. Because I am a law student and not a barred attorney however, you should not take this as legal advice pertaining to your specific issue. This is just a law student's explanation of some of the basic rights you have as a month-to-month tenant. If you want actual advice or assistance for this, definitely contact a fully barred attorney specializing in landlord-tenant law.
poledanceromance · 9/17/2013
I forgot to also suggest that you find out if there are any law schools nearby. Most of us have clinics where you can get legal assistance for free from upper-level law students who have a license to represent you in court. Usually these clinics specifically help those who don't have the resources to hire an attorney for a civil issue where you won't have the right to an attorney. That would be a great potential option for further advice on this if you have that option near your area.
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
I have a lease but its been up past due, i can give notice any time, u would do 30 says I'm not looking to hurt anyone just venting cause its a sucky position to be in...
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
I would do 30day notice
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
I rent a whole house
Runemist34 · 9/18/2013
30 days notice is perfectly reasonable, and you NEED to be warm! You aren't hurting anyone by choosing to take care of yourself.
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
Thanks Rune
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
So I did it, and even though he's fixing it this weekend I'm still considering moving because I don't want our friendship to be damaged by this landlord/tenant arrangement...I think I want to start my plan to get my own house, but I still need to down grade to save money I need to start putting mussel first for once!
HellOnHeelsNH · 9/18/2013
MYSELF FIRST!
DharmaDancer · 9/19/2013
One of the best things to ever happen to me was to rent from a psycho landlady who stalked me, read my mail, snooped in the apartment when I wasn't there, and walked outside past my windows buck naked while I tried to eat breakfast. Because of her, I vowed never to rent again, and I put my energies to buying my own house, which I did a year ago. Weird unpleasant predicaments are often the best means by which to prod us forward to better things in life. Good luck!