Confidence Pole Rut

Louisex started this discussion · 4/15/2010

Right girls, Had a first go on my XPert pole today, thing is I don't feel inspired anymore. I feel i've lost my mojo. I haven't been on a pole in a couple of months and today i had a go on my new pole. I felt as though I had lost all my strength and all my moves. I feel so sad because I feel as though iv no get up and go anymore. I need some sort of motivation. I'll watch other peoples pole videos and it makes me want to get on my pole, when I do get on it, I loose everything. Its as though my confidence or something has had a knock and I feel hopeless. Maybe im just being silly but i don't know. I want to try and be the best i can be and progress and learn more but my confidence is so low i don't know what i can do. x

8 replies

Melanie1982 · 4/15/2010
Evening, I know just how you feel, 🙁 I've stopped going to classes recently and will be joining Veena's classes soon, thing is I'm all motivated while watching and reading about pole, but as soon as I start, I seem to be going over the same things, I'm pretty much starting from scratch but some moves seem impossible, I'm trying Yoga Three times a week to hopefully strengthen and MOTIVATE myself, hoping it will help, x
pole-twista · 4/19/2010
when i feel that way i make a playlists of music i am feelin at the moment, put on some clothes that make me feel confident, and just move.. no pressure, no expectations.. if not feeling strong work on floor or wall work, chair dance, just dance. slow, fast whatever.. alot of times once you strat moving a little your mood will follow your body. hope things get better. 🌸
Veena · 4/19/2010
Keep at it!!! After being off the pole for month when I was pregnant with Henry, I was so discouraged. My body knew HOW to do the moves I just lacked the strength. Any time I take a few weeks off the first few times back on the pole are frustrating! I feel weak and unmotivated.....keep at it, don't give up 🥂 🥂
Serzi · 4/19/2010
We all feel like this at times, but what always helps me is to remember "Just because someone makes it LOOK easy in their video doesn't mean that it is." What you don't see is the hours of struggle and the weeks of building strength that came before that move was perfected. Nobody just gets up there and kicks butt right away, you know? You are absolutely capable of doing every move you see, you just gotta want it bad enough and keep trying. If you can't get something maybe you need to work on other moves and come back to that one later. Don't get ahead of yourself by watching all these amazing videos and then comparing yourself to them, that is not what sharing pole vids is for. You need to be proud of what YOU can do and keep at it until you are fit enough to progress. Personally, I like to take breaks from watching and recording videos so that I can get some "quality time" in with my pole. It totally works for me, but the only sad thing is that the first time I nail a new move I usually don't have a recording of it. Either my pole is camera-shy or I am, but it is true that I'm at my best when it's not on. I also feel better about what I can do when I'm not concerned about how I look while I'm doing it. I have a lot more fun and feel more inspired when I take the time to make mistakes and learn from them. Then, when I'm feeling especially good, I put on the camera and sometimes I get a nice little surprise. Then I feel GREAT about my abilities because it looks so much better than the last time I recorded my progress. Also, pay attention to the little things. Don't neglect the basics because you want so bad to pull off some kickass power-moves. Basics are what pole-dancing is made up of just like a book isn't really a good book unless it's got some plot before the conclusion. A girl can do all the power-moves and cool tricks she wants, but I'm not truly impressed unless she can DANCE too! I love a great back-hook spin on static-mode with an x-ankle landing, all smooth and controlled. Or when a chick can keep on her toes, pointed and graceful as she slowly drags one foot and then the other in a walk. And I love to see someone thoroughly enjoying themselves, smiling and laughing. This is when blooper-vids and practices are obviously too fun to not share! Haha! xD I hope that I helped you to somewhat reclaim your enthusiasm towards pole. Get up there and give it your all, RAWR! ? ~Serzi
StellaStiletto · 4/19/2010
I agree with Serzi: sometimes it's good to take a break from the hard stuff and go back to basics. I got some good advice like that from this website. Try slowing moves down... A LOT. That helps a lot with control, grace STRENGTH and making it look pretty. Serzi also said something I like: A girl can do tons of tricks and they may look cool, but the girls that are graceful and controlled that have mastered a toe drag look the most experienced to me... they look like better dancers, I think. It's all in how you WEEERRK it! I'm like you: I'm a little stuck with skill level, but if I take the advice of these other girls and really master spins, grips, etc, that will make transitions easier and prettier. And I am amazed at how many different spins there are out there! Oh, and try to do spins on both sides, if you haven't already. Keeps you from getting dizzy, works both sides in order to keep your body balanced, and I think it looks different, almost like its a new move. Well, happy practicing and best wishes! StellaStiletto
PoleSkivvies · 4/20/2010
Hang int here - we all go through that. When I got my Xpert - after returning a different pole that I did not like - I was all unmotivated. I had been so excited about the new pole that, having to return one and order another was wearing me down. But I pushed through and just tried to dance and play, and it all came back! And, personally, I found the grip on my Xpert so fantastic that that became motivation itself. 🙂
pole-twista · 4/25/2010
what great advice ladies! i was just feeling kinda blah about going on the pole as a little tired and it's rainy, but after reading all this i thought it would be fun to just go and dance for the sake of dancing. no video, no trying for any moves, just moving slow to a good jazz song. thanks a salways ladies ! 👸 👸 👸
Charley · 4/27/2010
I can totally relate to this. I'm at a point that the tricks I am trying to do take FOREVER to get and without being very flexible - I've probably hit my pinnacle right now. Teaching keeps me motivated and as of late I just try to dance and work everything out smoothly so it looks nice.