Complements and Confidence

This is something I've dealt with for a long time; the idea of feeling good about yourself, accepting yourself exactly how you are, and acting like it. I thought I would ask my fellow polers about it, because I believe this is something most, if not all women deal with...and men, too! As a little kid, I was told about being humble...though I don't know where I was told this! However, it worked for me, through elementary and highschool, I kept my head down and didn't EVER talk about myself as if I was "good" or "interesting," and I was certainly not attractive back then...or so said many of my bullies, anyways. Since then, this idea has haunted me...and I wonder if it haunts other people. How do you feel good about yourself without appearing vain? What is vanity, and how is it expressed? What do you do when people tell you that you aren't as good as you think, or challenge you to "prove it" or those kinds of things? What do you say to people when they give you complements? I've come a long way in being confident, but this continues to be a barrier for me. I always think it's good to talk to others and try to work these issues out! Besides, this IS a little bit pole related...because if I wasn't so down on myself, perhaps I would put up more videos, and be able to watch myself dance without wincing and thinking how awful it looks!