Can't pole ???

kim1972 started this discussion · 12/15/2010

Okay, so my hubby was stoked that I wanted to pole and he bought me a TG Xpole. I must confess that I have 2 issues that have made me not want to go and pole at home .. First, I take classes and have no issues poling in class. At home We've set up the pole in my bonus room that has 9 foot ceilings. Everytime that I've went to practice, I do a couple of spins and get so dizzy that I stop within 10min and can't resume practice. This doesn't happen during class and I'm not sure why I'm having the issues. Secondly, everytime that I've gone to practice the hubby comes upstairs to do something or watch and I get stage fright and can't do much... I know it sounds silly but I get soo nervous with him watching. He's very encouraging and last time he did see me he was surprised at how much I've improved on the pole. I"m not shy by any means and have no issues with doing ANYTHING and I mean ANYTHING else infront of him, so I don't know what my problem is here.. Any advice? Has anyone else had these issues?

13 replies

Audball · 12/15/2010
I'm not sure about the dizzy thing but when I first got my pole I was so nervous in front of him! I'd spent a month hyping meself up (and him) about getting a pole and how many videos I'd watched. Then when I got it, ok I couldn't do anything and you can so it's not the same, but when I did learn stuff, I was embarrassed of him watching! My pole's in the middle of the sitting room so that made things difficult!! After a while he became uninterested anyway, and I started to care less and less.. Now, I could be in nice underwear sexy dancing with my Pleaser's on and he won't look up from his iPad 🙂 You'll get used to it, just keep going and ignore him 🙂 I was planning on preparing a routine to show my boyfriend when I felt confident but in the end that would have been too much stress, so I just let it happen organically and now it's not an issue. Don't worry you'll get over it soon i'm sure 🙂
strawberryss · 12/16/2010
same here! same here!!! all of it, lol. I think the dizzy thing is bc in studio we spend alot of time just walking around the pole and doing little leg kick spins before going all out so we get the dizzies out. I'm going to try to do this at home as part of warm up also. the stage(boy) fright thing, still working on. i put on a cute outfit last night (not unlike what i would wear to studio) and started stretching and warming up, well, i ended up never taking off my sweatshirt, never actually poling, then gave up and started watching the movie with him! lol, my pole is in the living room as well, soooo. 🙄
minicoopergrl · 12/17/2010
You sound just like me (on the hubby issue). Which is why I take class and go to the gym. I just get totally wierded out when he watches me work out. its just creepy IMO. He also has a degree in exercise science and a former personal trainer so im always fearing hes gonna end up telling me do more than I feel like doing. I just dont think he needs to be watching me to crunches when hes washing the dishes KWIM? Do you spot when you spin? I try to spot as much as I can when I spin. But if your dizzy after a spin, do some hip circles or something similar until you can get back to normal.
monica kay · 12/17/2010
regarding the dizziness... if the studio you take classes at has mirrors, you may be "spotting" yourself during spins without even realizing it. if you are not familiar with spotting, it's what ballerina's and dancers do during spins to lessen dizziness- http://www.ehow.com/video_2382426_pirouette.html if that is the case, i think putting a mirror in your at home pole space would help. regarding stage fright with your man... i think you should tell him you are working on a "special" dance just for him & you dont want him to see until the unveiling. this way, he will stay out AND you will have some motivation to work on a flippin sweet routine!
EVamp83 · 12/20/2010
You could also try to explain to him that, although you're not sure why, you don't feel comfortable enough yet with your poledancing to let him watch you practice. You could suggest that you make short videos during practice with some highlights so you can keep him updated on your progress and accomplishments until you're ready to have him watch live and in realtime. Or you could agree to having him leave you alone while you practice, and then invite him to come look the final 10 minutes or so of your practice so you can show him some stuff. That way you can finish you practice first, at your own pace and without worrying about him seeing you stumble through pole-related experiments lol. 😀 When all else fails, practice when he's not at home. 😉
calipolepixie · 12/22/2010
Dizziness oh boy do I know that one. I have the same issue...but like someone said, i realized that if i do other stationary moves or poses in between, I don't get dizzy as frequently. It's going to be really interesting when I start trying spinny mode, I am not a good at spotting never have been. As far as my hubby watching, I was a little uneasy with that too at first until I started feeling really comfy with the pole. My pole is smack dab in the middle of our dining area, so i kinda have no privacy but I don't mind him watching now. 90% of the time he ignores me anyway now days when I am praticing.
kim1972 · 12/30/2010
thanks everyone for the advice.... I talked to the hubby about putting a mirror by my pole, incase that's what i'm doing and not realizing that I'm spotting at class. I also wonder if you girls are right and I should do some small warmups. so I'll try it and let you all know. as for being shy infront of the hubby.. yeah... still shy... think it'll just take time to get over.... :*(
hookedonpole · 12/30/2010
I'm kinda the opposite with hubby. In the beginning we both knew I didn't know what the heck I was doing, so he witnessed from beginning to now. He saw the fumbles, stumbles, awkward & painful attempts, etc. He even spotted me a lot and helped me off the pole when I got stuck. So now, he is impressed and comments on how I've improved, what moves are nice now in comparison to when I first started, etc. As for the pole "dance" part, I'm not good at it so I do have difficult time doing any of that in front of him, or even when I'm by myself 🙂 We have it in mind that I'm doing pole for fitness so it's easier to include him. When I attempt dance stuff, we just crack up. As others said, it gets easier, but also nice to have "your" pole time. As for dizziness, glad I read this post and will try spotting, cuz the dizziness is just too much for me, and I'm still doing pretty much basic spins; forget spin mode! 🤔
kim1972 · 1/1/2011
okay so i took my hubby to the place i bought my poling shoes cuz they have other things like wigs, costumes, etc... i decided to get a funky green short hair wig and costume. i'm gonna try putting myself into a different frame of mind when trying to pole infront of him.. does this sound weird to anyone??
monica kay · 1/3/2011
it really doesnt matter if it's weird or not... you should do what makes you happy and comfortable! btw- i dont think it's weird.
minicoopergrl · 1/4/2011
great idea Kim! That may get you out of that mindset. btw - I was using the wii fit last night in front of my husband and he understood I get creeped out with him watching. He played his gameboy while I worked out.
vamp79 · 1/4/2011
I don't think its weird at all, do whatever you think might help. I have danced 3 times for hubby already and still avoid practicing in front of him.
nymphdancer · 1/4/2011
I'm wierd, I prefer to pole when my husband is here. I feel like at dance better. and I try new things when he is around to spot me or help with hand positions. Of course I have no where else to pole then at home so there is that too. we also do jillians shred workout together in the am when we get up. one of my favorite things to do if I don't have to work at night is after the kids go to bed while he is on the computer is go put on something cute, put on some music and start dancing. I usually have his full attention by the end of the first song ;) computer or whatever he was doing totally forgotten.