Black Self-hatred...Pisses Me OFF

JiggaLuv87 started this discussion · 4/12/2013

This morning on FB I came across a video in my timeline. Honestly...I wish I'd never pressed play, sparing myself the amount of ignorance squeezed into those eleven and a half minutes. We all know racism still exists in some American parts...God still loves those people too. However, the WORST racism of all is the hatred towards one's own race!!! I truely cannot stand when I see or hear black girls and women say "I'm not black, I'm light brown". Newsfalsh sweetie, there was was I time that your shade of brown meant NOTHING because we were ALL considered BLACK and unworthy. I wanna cry sometimes at the amount of my people who'd rather refer to themselves as anything other than black.This goes for all races though; I have a friend that's hatian and she COMPLETELY hates to be referred to as such. Her Mother was born in the dominican republic but raised in Haiti. I'm not completely sure whether Stacy was born here or in Haiti, but what I do know that if you call her hatian she is QUICK to correct you and say she's dominican. God rest her soul, but her mother died when she was about 4 yrs old so she was raised by her father (100% hatian) and Stepmom (also 100% hatian), so she knew nothing about her mom other than her birthplace and chooses the more Spanish side and disowns the hatian side. I'm getting a bit long-winded but hopefully you get where I'm coming from with this. Here's the link to the video, I want to hear everyone's opinion on the matter: http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.worldstarhiphop.com%2Fvideos%2Fvideo.php%3Fv%3Dwshh3EpY4M722kq9K87v&h=LAQGEVMfh

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11 replies

poledanceromance · 4/12/2013
The light skinned/dark skinned divide is something that really fascinates me to study even though I have an outsider perspective. I wonder how much of it is influenced by the fact that some mixed race, women in particular, were able to pull off being south American or mediterranean or something else in America that wasn't "negro." In recent years I have moved from referencing black people as "African American" to simply saying "black" and I did that because I had a schoolmate correct me that she was Haitian, and that I shouldn't be afraid to call people black since not every black person is African American. Obviously everyone has the right to indentify as they choose, but I've never had someone correct me because they didn't want to be called black so this is really interesting to me and have me a lot to think about. I study equality issues with such interest, especially now that our society is getting so beautifully mixed up that you can't assume a person's heritage from how they look. Clearly that's challenging a lot of people to examine how they identify themselves. Cool post, thanks for getting this topic going!
Lee lee · 4/12/2013
I used to be one of those people who said that but not because I hated who I was, but it felt like I was being disrespectful to my other races since I am mixed. Sometimes people have trouble figuring out what I am mixed with. I get a lot of random people asking me what I am and usually I diffuse any possible awkwardness with saying my races and then saying "But I prefer to be called -my name here-". It gets people laughing. I'm not 'just' black and I do like to point that out, when appropriate. I was luck enough to be a mixed girl!
CreativityBySteffie · 4/12/2013
Im danish. You might not be able to see it on my face, but its still not something that Im proud of. I find my own country to be snobby, fake and spoiled. Basically the mean girl, in class.
JiggaLuv87 · 4/12/2013
I too have to correct people when I get the random guesses on nationality. People mostly base their guess on my hair and accent (which btw I still don't hear it lol). They assume I'm either, french, jamaican, or hatian...one guy thought I was Jewish and I'm still not sure how he came to that conclusion. So I myself DO have to say I'm JUST black. Apparently I look too "exotic" to be black people tell me, which kinda bugs me. Almost as if thy're saying black ppl are just...meh. I didn't like the words they used in the video because they were down right INSULTING. We look dirty and crusty...SERIOUSLY!!! Had they rephrased everything in a way that was more eplanitory rather than just BASHING an entire race, I would've respected them more.
CreativityBySteffie · 4/12/2013
All it really comes down to, is the individual person. I dont think my country is all its cracked up to be, but I know alot of danish people that I love. (I also dislike some:)) I really think its stupid for people to put races in categories. How do we know this anyway? How would I know if every single black person looks dirty? Im bound to be wrong, if I claim that, so why do it? I dont understand these people. I've experienced dangerous racism against danish people in 2006. A danish newspaper, published som very mean racist pictures of muslim faith. That was not okay, for the NEWSPAPER, but every dane got jugded. I've been in Tunesia, a muslim country, 12 times and I love it,so naturally that year, we went back. We had been told not to say we were from Denmark, beceause it could be dangerous. However, for us it was not an option. We had been in the same local area 12 times. They knew us. Normally we were always welcomed greatly, but this year, the locals were silent, didnt want to speak to us. One night some younger guys, threatened me and my former BF, but we were luckily able to talk ourselves out of a fight, by having to listen to nasty comment, about how stupid we were. I didnt have anything to do with that publishing, and I would never hve done such a thing, but Im still today, being jugded for it. Thats one of the reasons, Im not a proud dane.
Serzi · 4/12/2013
Kind of an opposite story (and this will probably be a novel because I don't know any other way to tell it), but I hate when white/mixed chicks try to pretend they're not. For example, I grew up in a small town in Northern Michigan. While seeing a black person was about as common as seeing a unicorn up there in my youth, there were a lot of people w/ Ojibwe descent. My best friend from kindergarten to hs was a "quarter-blood" and I remember through most of grade school she and I were serious outcasts. (Me because I was the only girl w/ a single parent and I lived in an apartment instead of a house. My friend because she was part native and lived down a dirt road in a cabin her father built himself. Annnnnnd we were both totally poor, but anyway.....) By the mid 90's it became decidedly uncool w/ members of my generation to be white, whereas prior to that it was uncool to be anything but a proud spoiled white asshole to everyone else. The same kids who threw rocks at us in grade school suddenly accepted my friend w/ open arms. Not me, though, I was just "white trash". lol I tried not to be down about as my friend and I were still besties. However, in HS, she started talking a lot of shit about white people in general and included me in her "white devil"-speech. I rolled my eyes and said "Well, don't forget, you're about 75% white devil yourself. You know? Your mom's as white as snow." It pissed me off. I also can't stand chicks who have Oompa Loompa spray tans who claim to be part native/hispanic/black. Be who you really ARE, not just the color of your skin.
PatSmack · 4/12/2013
As Human being in this world in order for me to survive I had to admit my failures. As human being first with same sex attraction, I had to fail at being the son my father and mother wanted me to be, the grandson, nephew, friend, and associate. All of these truths were liberating me. I faced my quote on quote "blackness'', just as everyone else has to face their own color, race, religion, and so on, but I realized midway through is that I am my own and I refuse to carry on the struggle, the reason, or rules preset for me to dictate how universal I can be with everyone else. I was taught to consider myself a descendent of a slave, a bi product of life I never knew with people I never known. All I can do is live my one life and try to remember it in the next. If we keep the woes up than no one will ever no the real freedom we are supposed to feel on this planet. Look how interactive the world is now that we all have become better in our crafts at pole dance and fitness. I see people on street signs, trees, poles, and people now thats freedom to me. I wish you the best in dealing with the racial anxieties but my best advice is the be the only one you! As for me im not anyone's ideal of what black should be but the best at who I want to be.
Linuxgirl · 4/12/2013
In response to that video: wow, that girl hates herself, 1:08 seconds into the video my boyfriend who is black, is saying "wait till she's pulled over by the police, then she can go on about how she isn't black". We live in Detroit and I never thought getting stopped because one is black was real until I witnessed it for myself. This chick reminds me of a girl I worked with who was a black girl from LA, just as stuck up and self loathing, she actually let a white guy put plastic wrap over her vag when he went down on her and she thought that was ok ..and what white guys did. 1:38 (completely disgusted with this chick by this point in the video don't know if I can take much more of her). There have been many scientific studies on light/dark skin thing and thanks to marketing and mainstream media these ideas that light skin is better than dark skin will continue to exist. It's hard to see a guy whom most would consider a darker guy say dark skinned girls are busted. 2:35 8:56, Still more lemmings believing what they are being fed by the media, defined by what they look like or what they think they should look like, or act like and are trying to say a caste system is still practiced and they still practice racism based on caste. I hope their parents watched this video.
adAstra · 4/12/2013
I grew up with my mom telling me not to hang out with black or Hispanic people and "don't DARE bring a black man home." The funny thing is my mother is Hispanic! There is definitely a lot of self-hate in minority groups--my partner's mom always told him to "better the race" by marrying someone whiter than him (they are also Hispanic). It took me YEARS to get away from all the racism, sexism, and homophobia I grew up with. I look back now and I'm ashamed that I didn't want to be associated with certain people based on their skin color or other artificial reasons. I may as well have based my choices on height or hair cut for how valid that was. Hate is destructive. It ruins your chance for so many things, like getting to be friends with amazing people. I forget what color my friends are because it really doesn't matter to me. At the same time, I love learning about different cultures because no one culture is more "advanced" than the other, there is something rich and wonderful to find in each one. I don't understand how people won't see that!
zoeyxxxx · 4/12/2013
this world acturrly annoyes me. going off the subject off race to sexualitey. i was planning on getting married in scottland found my self a nice big church/castle type thing. and a nice hotel to have a small reception in after. well when i ramg too book the hotel i was told i was not alowed my reception there becsuse i was celebrating a cival partnership. ohhh never been so angry in my life. what makes one person think they have a right to judge sum one om race. religion. sexuality or for anything :@
Runemist34 · 4/12/2013
Unfortunately this sort of thing isn't kept only to race, sexuality, religion etc. It happens to anyone, of any kind, in a lot of situations. When I was much younger, I was outcaste for being shy (I was actually suffering, and still do suffer, an anxiety problem). As I got older, I was criticized for being thin, or not "developing" at the same time as all the other girls. Or because I couldn't talk properly (again, anxiety, makes one's mouth occasionally misbehave), or because I just hid away from everyone and read or wrote, or because I wasn't interested in dating the "popular boys," or at all. And now, the media criticizes me for being fat, for not eating perfectly, for having curly hair, for having a round face or nose, for being a writer (or should I say, "artist"), for being female, for being... anything. It upsets me to see someone commit so much self-hatred because of their skin colour. The only time I actually SEE someone's skin colour is to appreciate how beautiful it is! To me, it's the same as coloured hair, or having large hands- there's no right or wrong to it, and often, our differences make us beautiful! Then again, it upsets me to see any self-hatred. I know what it's like... I engage in it often, and have been doing my best to teach myself a better way for some time now. The process is slow, but it still progresses. Zoey, keep looking for someplace that accepts you and who you are. I know they're out there. Scotland is a beautiful, ample place, and I would also love to get married there! Or even just visit there!