advice, muscle shaping?

so it looks like now i've finaly come to a place where i have to make a lot of hard decisions all at once, and some of them come down to what is physicaly possible. at this point I am losing my waist, not in the awsome way that means it's getting smaller but in the bad way that means i'm gaining abs in ways i don't want, i've taken pretty well to poling because i have a tendancy to grow muscle pretty fast, knowing that i was aware that it might get to this point but hoped that because i also naturaly had a preportunatly small waist it would work out, because every time i dance i feel worse. so now my actual question is there any way i can minimize the outward expansion of my abs so they can go back to the way they belong? I would really not want to give up pole all together becasue of this, but i also don't want to spend the rest of my life feeling like crap about how i look.