StudioVeena.com Forums Discussions Read this post on Psychology Today about Pole Dancing

  • x falcon 3 0 x

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 2:08 am

    Thanks for sharing this, Anamika!  I posted my 2 cents.

  • Pole Raven

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 7:38 am

    Thanks for sharing this.  As a doctoral student in psychology, I always find this stuff fascinating.  I followed on of the references in the article to this, which has some qualitative-research backing.  It will be interesting to read the book!

    http://www.palgrave-journals.com/fr/journal/v101/n1/full/fr20126a.html

  • TheDiva

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 7:59 am

    If all you took away from a class was gyrating and grinding on the pole, I cannot help but wonder if you were blind, def and dumb.

  • SpyralBound

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 8:35 am

    Thing is… empowerment is subjective, not objective. It can't be measured, only perceived. So the question "Is pole dancing empowering?" is inherently flawed. Power, in the sense of personal power, the value one feels they bring to the world, is a manmade invention and exists entirely in our heads. (Obviously this is different than "legal" empowerment, i.e. the right to vote.) I also have a beef with the claim "It objectifies women" – what, the pole does? Only people can objectify people, so by claiming that pole dance objectifies women, you're really just objectifying women who pole dance. And besides, though no one wants to admit it, everyone objectifies other people. Politicians, advertisers, salesmen, you and me. I really don't think there's such a thing as a world without objectification, nor do I personally believe all objectification is 100% evil. 

    For the sake of argument, though, I do think she can have an opinion on it without ever trying it. Example: Porn. What a contentious topic that can be, especially among feminists or feminist-leaning people. Pro-sex feminists will argue that it's empowering, given that everything happening is consensual, because women should be free to make whatever sexual choices they want, even if that choice is being gangbanged on camera for money. Meanwhile a whole another faction believes porn is exploitative, damaging and contributes to rape culture by giving its viewers unrealistic expectations and encourages sexual abuse. The kicker being: the grand majority of the people on both sides have never actually been porn actors themselves, or worked in the adult entertainment industry at all. They are talking about whether other people find it empowering or feel exploited — again, very subjective terms. But the lack of direct experience doesn't stop anyone from evaluating the merits of porn and the effects of porn on society, and I personally agree with that – we can't limit discussion of topics only to those with firsthand experience or else it becomes an echo chamber. 

    For a totally nonsexual example, I've never played football beyond throwing one around with my brother in the backyard, but I'm still within my rights to have an opinion on the dangers of traumatic brain injury among NFL players, what the NFL is doing (or really, NOT doing) to address it, and my general gut feeling that football is kinda stupid and boring. I'm not obligated to change my mind on any of those issues to please football players or fans, any more than this author or anyone is obligated to change their minds on pole dance. 

    Be it prostitution or exotic dancing/stripping or webcam girls or sex toy parties, women engaging in sexual endeavors with confidence and enthusiasm (rather than modesty and shame) makes people NERVOUS. Not just because women are challenging societal norms, but also because a lot of those activities can be damaging; not every prostitute, stripper, or web cam girl is doing it because they really want to, but because they feel there's no other choice, or in worst cases have been forced to. Sex trafficking stays largely under the public radar but remains a huge problem globally. 

    So from the outside, how can any one person, psychologist or otherwise, know what's going on in a particular case? How can she know whether the women in the pole dance classes at her gym haven't suffered from past sexual trauma, or aren't currently? After all, one motivating factor to take on something like sexy pole dance can be to reclaim one's sexuality from someone else who has owned it – parents, the church, a romantic partner, an abuser/rapist, society and culture. Or even taking the sexy out of it and just looking at fitness: does that pole dance junkie in the corner taking ALL the classes have body image issues or an eating disorder (which can include exercise binging)? Obviously this is not the case for the grand majority of pole dance students, but it CAN and DOES happen so I can understand a degree of skepticism. (I mean, body image and self-esteem issues come up on these forums all the time.) 

    This reminds me of a former friend of mine who I met during my early days of pole dancing. I encouraged her several times to try it with me, especially when I found out she'd done it in the past. But when I pressed her on it, she told me about her abusive ex-boyfriend who coerced her into pole dancing (a) for his pleasure and (b) so she'd have the body he wanted her to have. Pole dancing actually stripped her of her power in that relationship (well, it wasn't the only thing), rather than empowered her, and she didn't want to take it up again now because she believed it would trigger a cascade of very negative feelings about herself, her sexuality and her body. 

    So insisting that pole dancing is or isn't empowering, either way, will end up ignoring and thus invalidating the unique experiences of individual women and glossing them over with a majority opinion. Do I personally feel empowered by pole dance? Sure, sometimes. It has generally made me feel more positively about my body and my capacity to be sexually attractive to others. But it can also make me feel like crap, when I'm having a bad practice day, or when I judge my body in my videos, or when I'm crying because I'm trying to shop for hot pole dance clothes and can't find anything that's right for my body because I'm "too big" in some areas. So my answer to that question will vary depending on when you ask me. 

    I've already said a lot so I'll try to wrap this up. Just like there are so many different styles of pole dance and no one style is superior or more valid than the others, there are so many different ways of reacting to pole dance and no one reaction is more valid. Obviously most of us here would ideally prefer positive, nonjudgmental or even enthusiastic reactions, but the simple fact is there will always be people who either disagree or are skeptical. (Try to think of one thing the whole world sees the same way. I'll wait.)  That's the beauty of the human intellect: diversity. For better or for worse. â€‹

  • Kobajo84

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 9:28 am

    Beautifully said SpyralBound.

  • ginger78

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 9:43 am

    She was at a woman’s fitness center checking out the class listings. I’m not sure how porn jumped into the “She didn’t even try it and she is writing about it disapointment comment.” Just goes to show perception is what makes things acceptable or not.

  • anamika

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 1:01 pm

    Thank you all for sharing.  I'm really glad that this article started such a discussion.  I definitely learned a lot from the discussion.  I'm very protective and passionate of what I do and honestly, I was defensive when I first read the post on PsychToday but after reading all other perspectives, I'm just glad that I got to learn what I didn't know before. 

    Thank you Veena for giving us this site to share our feelings and what we are passionate about. 

     I was a very thin little girl and hated being called "skinny".  I can't stand that word.  And now, I love my body cuz I'm 115 llb of muscle.  Pole gave me so much.  I started pole classes sometime last year (so it has been a year now)  I love that I get to experience my body in a whole different way now than I did when I was younger.   And I guess that's why I get protective of it.  I'm not where I want to be but I'm loving my journey of taking myself to a whole another level.

    Thank you ladies for being on this journey with me…………….

  • Veena

    Administrator
    October 9, 2013 at 1:20 pm

    I can totally relate to being called skinny and it affecting my self-esteem! I love seeing everyone sharing, I learn so much about myself through you all!!!

  • tacha666

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 5:11 pm

    I’d love to read the comments on that article! Where do I find them?

  • SpyralBound

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 5:28 pm

    Thanks kobajo.

    And ginger, I was using porn as an example of a similar subject with hotly contested perspectives on whether or not it’s empowering, to counterpoint those saying she shouldn’t publish her views on it until she’s tried it. We all have views and beliefs about things we haven’t actually experienced firsthand.

  • Cherished

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 6:09 pm

    @Tacha If you scroll all the way down it says "Join the discussion"

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/millennial-media/201310/is-pole-dancing-actually-empowering-women/comments

     

     

  • Phoenix Hunter

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 10:54 pm

    this writer is a F*%king douchebag… and a moron at best. I'm surprised to hear that she has a college degree in anything. Critical thinking should be a required class for anyone wanting to call themselves a psychologist. I hope she doesnt take care of patients, I hope she only uses her degree to write ignorant articles such as this because her female patients are getting treated like $hit.

  • opielee

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 11:17 pm

    Lol,boy this writer has a bug up her ass!i guess it never occurred to her that any type of dance can be misconstrued as sexual,why does pole have to be the bad guy ?and frankly,I pole because it’s a way for me to express myself,yes,pole dance is self expression at its best,it’s whatever you want it to be because it’s personal n sacred to you

  • Youngs7

    Member
    October 9, 2013 at 11:24 pm

    Hi Guys,

    All I can say is wow.  This person doesn't have a clue as to how pole dancing has helped some of us psychologically.  Everyone has a right to their opinion; however, I think it would be wise to speak to some people to get a better understanding of why some people prefer poling rather than the so called standard of exercising at a gym.

    Some people prefer walking the treadmill and some of us prefer working the pole!!! 🙂  In my opinion, the pole is better than the gym because of the challenges in which one must conquer.  If she read this, then she probably would not understand what the hell I am talking about. LOL

    Anyhow, we as polers do not demean others because of their preference of the type of exercise they choose to participate in.  I think some people just do not understand the art and its too bad for that person.  If he/she took the time to try it, then an understanding as well as credit would be shown to people who participate in poling.  Moreover, with their ignorance of the art, it does not surprise me that those statements would be made.  Some people are judgmental individuals and that is a part of our world which we as polers just have to continue to do what pleases us.

    As the saying goes… Don't knock it until you try it!!! (She might like it)  Well, enough rambling from me.  Poling really helps me in many ways… especially when I am battling with my depression. 🙂

  • SToast

    Member
    October 13, 2013 at 10:19 pm

    It doesn’t matter if you “strip” and pole for a living or just in your living room it is incredibly empowering to be strong. And everyone who has even attempted pole knows you have to be strong. Being strong and sexy is the double whammy. Pole is that double whammy. Couple that with the “no judgement” environment of the pole community and you have a sanctuary for women of all walks of life. And if you are good enough and confident enough to do it for a living that is impressive. She would know that if she had attended a couple of classes before writing the article.

  • SToast

    Member
    October 13, 2013 at 10:19 pm

    It doesn’t matter if you “strip” and pole for a living or just in your living room it is incredibly empowering to be strong. And everyone who has even attempted pole knows you have to be strong. Being strong and sexy is the double whammy. Pole is that double whammy. Couple that with the “no judgement” environment of the pole community and you have a sanctuary for women of all walks of life. And if you are good enough and confident enough to do it for a living that is impressive. She would know that if she had attended a couple of classes before writing the article.

  • Nats01

    Member
    October 14, 2013 at 4:11 am

    @Youngs7 – if I could LIKE your comment twice, I would. You said it!

  • HellOnHeelsNH

    Member
    January 7, 2014 at 9:52 am

    “However, some feminist scholars argue that objectification of women in part plays into rape culture. As such rape and assault is more likely to occur in a society where women are in essence treated as objects.” Um is she serious? This is bs…and comparing and kind of Pole dance to what mylie Cyrus is doing for publicity is also a joke… I notice she didn’t mention the Blurred Lines video… In my humble opinion… If she really wanted to be “objective” she would have taken the class herself and probably had a much different story, but her instant judgment held her back from being truly open and objective…. And that makes her a very ignorant “phycologist”

  • HellOnHeelsNH

    Member
    January 7, 2014 at 9:55 am

    Feminist scholars who would also blame a woman being raped because of what she wears also… Not really… That’s all about power ok this one got me going lol

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