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Pole Farts
Yes. It’s true. The title of this post is Pole Farts. I’ve been debating whether or not to post this for like 3 weeks now, but my favorite author (Chuck Palahniuk) says "Do what scares you the most", so I’m posting. Has anyone ever experienced a pole fart while you were upside down or doing a strenuous move???? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_confused.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_confused.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_confused.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif
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130 Replies
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OMG heheheheheh too funny. Of course I know about "pole farts" I have had 4 babies https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/bom.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/bom.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/bom.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/bom.gif so I’m the queen of it!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_queen.gif LOL I will write more later on this matter, gotta go get the groceries….to be continued. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_geek.gif
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OMG PHEW!!!!!!! im so relieved im not the only one!!!!! thank god you wrote something, im sitting here fretting whether i should have deleted this post or not LOL! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumleft.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumleft.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif
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Hahahahaha! OMG…who hasn’t??? You got some guts Sasha! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumleft.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif
My husband jokes that pole "brings out the best in me"! hehehehehe https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif
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hahaha… as i have not been poling for that long and have only recently started to do inverts, i experienced my first "pole fart" over the weekend lol… happens to me when i do yoga and pilates too… so no, you are def not the only one!! thanks for posting, when it happened my bf was in the room https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_redface.gif and we both just stopped in our tracks, stared at each other for a sec and started cracking up https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif … lol no worries, we are all human baby!!
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Sasha you are too funny! Hats off to you for bringing up something most of us don’t mention. LOL! Yes I’ve experienced "pole farts" also. It’s especially embarrrassing when you’re upside down trying to look graceful when this happens, and then your 8 year old son says "gosh mom did you just fart?", and then commences waving his hand to clear the air. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_redface.gif
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haha your son tries to clean the air, drkfairy. Ok so here is what happens, its simply air that has sneaked in to miss vajay jay https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_smurfin.gif I have figured out a way to control it to some degree…..Kegels. You know the exercise for your lady business as glitter would say. Now doing kegels themselves wont prevent the pole fart, but by practicing them you will be able to contract the muscles before you go to try that strenuous move. So here’s what works for me.
1 before preforming a strenuous move, give a slight push out, so bare down slightly, with the ummm (ok I"m gonna avoid medical terms cuz we already freak the guys out as it is) https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif with the vajay jay. This will let out any air that has been hiding out lol.
2 now contract (squeeze) miss V, and continue to hold it, while beginning to perform the strenuous move.
3 next, it works best if you can continue to hold the contraction, you could.. relax a bit (not all the way!!) once your inverted lol. If you relax too much you’ll suck up air…sorry no pretty way to put that. Every women different, and babies can do a number on miss vajay jay.
4 On the way back down.. remember you should still be contracting, lower your body down, release the contraction only after you are upright.
I know it sounds like a lot of stuff to remember but if you practice it you will start to do it naturally plus, you’ll be working out your lady business too!! Your significant other might even notice your new, stronger lady business. hehe I’m soooooo bad, I hope I haven’t offended anyone. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_flower.gifHow to do a Kegel
The muscle your strengthening is the pubococcygeus muscle or PC muscle
This muscle is an important one, for pleasure https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_redface.gif child birth https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/bom.gif and incontinent prevention (so you don’t pee when you sneeze or laugh https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif .
The easiest way to figure out how to contract your PC muscle, is to stop the flow of urine (pee) ew, ew, ew, I know!! There are male kegel exercise too but I’m already uncomfortable, so we wont go there. Be sure your not just clinching your bum, try to keep all other muscle relaxed. There are different ways to do a kegel, you can do a bunch in a row, so for example.. squeeze, squeeze, ect. or hold it as long as possible. or do kind of a squeeze and push out. Ok I’m sooooo done now. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_geek.gif -
Veena, OMG! You’re too funny! LMAO!! I hope the boys aren’t getting too squeemish! I’m at work doing my Kegels right now! (squeeze) https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_thumright.gif
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LOL Veena! You know how little boys are. Thanks for the great kegel tips! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif
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SEE!!! this is why i love this site, because we’re all so supportive even when it’s a humiliating topic. i’ve experienced this, i think it’s called a queef, when im doing a certain chair move too, you flip up onto the chair….anyways. veena you’re amazing for posting all of that, thank you thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif i thought i was the only one who experienced this, i was beginning to think i was a freak or somethin!
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Oh Sascha you’re not a freak https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_tongue.gif
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LOL!! this reminds me of a dancer friend of mine that i go-go danced with for a short time. She had told me that you could be up on stage, pulling off the sexiest pose ever, while at the same time "letting one out"… so all these guys are like drooling over you, meanwhile little do they know… hehe i thought that was so funny! now whenever i go out and see the dancers i sometimes can’t help having her words run through my mind. Geez if i was a guy she would’ve probably spoiled all my fun lol https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_tongue.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cyclops_ani.gif
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Sascha, you are the best for posting this!
So, to be clear, are we talking both kinds of farting, or just from Miss Va Jay Jay? I can’t wait to see what fun inverting brings. (Now we know the real reason the music is turned up so loudly in the clubs!) https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif
Jennifer
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I feel weird because this hasnt happened to me! I want it to happen so I can join the club..I feel so left out! But there was a thread on stripperweb.com about a similar topic and a lot of girls posted saying that they or their friends who worked at the club were notoriously guilty for crop dusting everyone at the tip rail when a dancer was doing a good show and they werent tipping….I thought that was so hilarious.
Oh and I’m glad I’ve officially coined the term "lady business" on StudioVeena…do I get a prize?!? However I was really impressed with how many names for lady business Veena used in one post https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_tongue.gif
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Kegels are great for getting the lady business back to normal right after having a kid, and somewhere I heard that it just makes "playtime" feel better overall (to be blunt it’s just because it makes you tighter). Right after I had my little girl a year and a half ago, I started doing them before I even went to sleep the night she was born. I was scared of not feeling the same to my husband… I think I was successful???
Haha Foxy, I have always done kegels right after giving birth too! It can also help heal a small tear or episiotomy faster. I had to experiment a lot, to figure out a way to control my lady business so I could record the video lessons without er…um interruption. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_pale.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gifGlitter, you have never had this happen?? Not even after s-e-x? I say in a whisper. This is one club you don’t want to be in a rush to join. LOL
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This has to be the best thread!
I’ve released a biggie (in hushed voice) after sex while I was sitting on my then boyfriend’s lap. He said he liked the vibration! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_shaking.gif I’m not sure if I should believe him because he never did let me do it again after that https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif
I haven’t had it happen while hanging upside down from a pole yet, but I look forward to it and I hope it’ll be loud and proud! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_salut.gif -
Oooohhh I thought we meant strictly when poling. Yes it has happened after SEX (there! i said it super loud! haha leave it to me to say what no one else wants to say https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_tongue.gif ) fortuntately not with my new boyfriend yet thank god!!! But my old boyfriend liked certain positions (i wont go into gory details) that would have tendencies to force more air up there so i did have them…we would just look at each other and start cracking up it was soooo funny!
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I’m laughing so hard I don’t even know what to write!!! HEHEHEHEHE! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif
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I just wanted to say that I knew straight away who had posted this thread as soon as I read the title… who else but Sascha? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif
And you are all laughing about this, but it is NOT funny when there is a club full of people and the stupid music skips and turns itself off, leaving no other noises but a ringing in your ears and a very unladylike sound. That is all I have to say about that.
And as for "tightness" (giggle) I don’t know whether it’s me exercising without realising it or pole dancing in general, but since I started dancing EVERY muscle in my body has become stronger.
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Ok…I hope I get a pass on this….
For the record, even though I have a bachelors in Psychology and am not a nurse, I’ve worked 25 years as a public health professional–the last 22 years inspecting nursing homes (all components of the inspectional tasks, from photographing garbage dumpsters, reviewing charts, investigating physical and financial abuse, to observing psychosocial therapy groups). I am also the Determination of Need screener for Supportive Living Facilities in Southern Cook County for Public Aid (now called Healthcare and Family Services)
So my interest in incontinence issues is purely professional..not prurient.
Incontinence tends to be one of the primary threshold issues in families making the decision to place an elderly relative into an institutional living setting (i.e., nursing home). In addition to the "cosmetic" issues of odor and appearance,etc…, incontinence can be the gateway to skin breakdown and the formation of pressure ulcers ("bedsores") in the perineal/coccyx area. So anything that a person can do to stave off this problem is quite beneficial from a medical standpoint also!
Believe it or not, but the technology of Kegel exercises now permits patients with difficult pelvic floor issues to connect a device to their PC via a USB connector. The device will measure pressure on different areas of the sensor to tell you if you are "squeezing" the right area and put a graph up in your spreadsheet program. These devices are VERY expensive and mostly limited to rehab professionals–but a few are available to consumers on line.
There is now a Kegel device that will "talk" to you via a Bluetooth wireless headphone. It’s called the "Peritron Precision Perineometer" and it runs about a thousand bucks. (No, really…I’m not kidding–google the name!)
Probably not a necessary item for the average person (unless you are the ultimate gadget freak, LOL!)–but a useful kind of device for individuals with more severe issues and a need to "train" and "learn" where the muscle groups are located…
Men can benefit from these exercises, too. I’ve learned from hundreds of sceening interviews that elderly men are rarely honest about low level incontinence issues (dribbling is how it usually starts), so denial is a factor. Guys won’t do the exercises because they don’t ever admit they have a problem.
Joel
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wow Joel https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif I’ll take one of those! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif I am also a big fan of kegels right after childbirth, and anytime https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif
I am laughing my ass off at this thread! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif
I actually cannot believe I haven’t farted while poling, I fart and queef totally regularly……I’m sure as I do more inverts it will happen……. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif
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Ok, so if I’m getting everything I need to remember to keep my abs engaged, shoulders back, point my toes, and now squeeze and contract ladytown??? Phew, I’ve got a lot to learn yet.
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Yes Seminolgal… there’s a lot of stuff to remember when pole dancing and but it’s still a fun way to stay fit. What other sport allows you to let rip? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif
By the way, I should have kept you guys posted on this, not that anyone really wants to know, but I had my first pole fart the other day! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_flower.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_salut.gif -
lol, Are we talking lady front bottom farts or traditional bottom? I have yet to experience any front bottom farts!
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so now i have to remember all that and than also learn how to stay on the pole?! If i get laughing way to hard https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_redface.gif , I fart! So I tried not to laugh as hard, my bf gets a kick out of it! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif Veena where did you learn all of this!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif
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