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No (former) strippers allowed in my studio competition :(
Hey folks,
I just found this site and what a blessing I did! I've been training at a local studio for the past 6 months and they're preparing for their annual pole competition. I've been really excited for trying out and seeing how far I could go when I read through the rules and regulations and saw that any current or former exotic dancers are barred from entering. I danced professionally for years, and now only work once every few months (when I really need to pay my car insurance!), and I feel really sad and disappointed that I can't compete. I'm not "out" to anyone at my studio as an exotic dancer, except for a few others that I know have also stripped.
I do understand the desire to keep aerobic pole dancing and strips clubs separate, in fact the two parts of my life couldn't be more different (I do one for money and one for fun!). However, I wonder if it's worth bringing it up to my instructor that I think it's unfair or if that will just make trouble for me in the long run. Has anyone else dealt with this?
I love my instructors and fellow students and I don't want to upset the studio, but I just feel like if they knew I danced professionally it might change their view of strippers and see that we're not all nuts, on drugs, etc. and they might reconsider the clause. There's already way more language in the rules and regulations that deal with behaving properly and representing the studio well than on the stripping part. I'm okay at pole dancing (getting better!), but it's not as if I have an unfair advantage over the other amazing dancers at the studio.
I don't know, what do folks think? I just feel sad and left out right now. Am I being too sensitive?
Thanks!
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60 Replies
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I’ve never dealt with this kind of situation but I happen to agree with you in that it’s unfair to have current or former strippers compete. As long as the competitor isn’t parading her naughty bits in front of the crowd while performing, I don’t see much of an issue.
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It’s unfair to not allow them to compete, I meant.
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My question is how would they know if you don’t tell them?
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Thanks Tasha!
HellOnHeels: I guess I would just feel bad about lying. Also if they were ever to find out (my fellow students go to A LOT of strip clubs) it would be grounds for stripping me of any even a small title I might get. Not that I really think I have any chance of winning, but on the off chance.
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Me personally i wouldn’t tell them, its no ones biz but I’ve been retired for a few years… I think its a bs rule and probably wouldn’t be in a studio like that, because that seems judgmental…like you said e are not all crazy drug addicted mental cases
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I am really confused how being a stripper or ex strippers gives one an advantage? It is not like you are trained to be an exotic dancer and what a majority do is wrong anyways. They have to relearn from ground zero when they take classes. I would pose this question to the instructor. It does not seem fair or logic based and it is discriminates, after all pole dancing is composed of women who are supposed to be accepting of sexuality and their bodies. The only reasoning I can think of is they think someone will have an edge.
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Clubs have competitions to that’s another option
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HellonHeelsNH…I am not trying to upset anyone by saying this but stripping competition and pole competition are two completely different elements. If she wants to be taken seriously in the pole world (plans to compete) it would be hard if she competed in stripping/exotic dance competitions.
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I under stand that hence “another option” maybe casual speaking of the ladies who are world competitors now when they started as exotic dancers
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They do have Pole competitions in strip clubs that are not “stripping competitions” too
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I appreciate all of the advice, thank you!
I may just ask my primary instructor and see what she says. If I didn't have to sign a piece of paper saying I wasn't at any time an exotic dancer I might just keep it to myself, but that just always worries me.
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I'm in the same situation. I danced in college, before I got into serious pole, and was always perfectly open about my history. Then I got barred from a studio competition. The reason the studio gave me for the "no strippers" rule was the the contest was for amateurs so they barred anyone who had ever made money pole dancing including instructors. I pointed out that being a stripper does not mean you have competition pole experience or any advantage at all, a lot of clubs don't even have poles. They refused to bend. I left the studio over it.
It deeply upsets me that this rule exists anywhere, and not because it excludes me. I think its hypocritical. We claim to be a supportive sisterhood striving towards the common goals of artistry and acceptance, yet we ostracize and stigmatize those who have a past we don't "approve" of all while shouting that pole dancers shouldn't be stigmatized for their lifestyle. We shouldn't have to hide that we're pole dancers to the rest of the world, and we certainly shouldn't have to hide that we were strippers to our pole family. If we want to differentiate pole from stripping, then we shouldn't exclude strippers any more than we do singers or guitarists: pole is a sport, different from all entertainment-based performance.
I don't have any real advice for you other than to make your case and hope they see reason. But I also see the risk in that, if they don't allow you to compete, are you willing to stay somewhere where you know you are not held as an equal?
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I've known of studios that actually won't let students take classes if they've been exotic dancers. This is discrimination. Can businesses actually refuse clients like this? I don't think they can and I've often wondered how this studio gets away with this operation. I would never deny someone coming to my classes for any reason unless they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol and posing a danger to themselves or others. Luckily I haven't had to experience asking a student not to attend a class for this reason. I think for competitions, the fact one has been an exotic dancer is irrelevant.
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As a dancer with professional experience, YOU might have some wonderful things to share with the studio as far as dance technique! I think it is wrong for them to ban exotic dancers. I think that since you love this studio and it's people so much, you should talk to them and find out the reasons why they chose to make such a rule. I cannot think of any legitimate reason to exclude exotic dancers. I used to dance in strip clubs and the girls I take pole classes with now have no experience in strip clubs and they are FAR FAR better pole dancers than I am!
If their issue is with unfair advantages, you might ask your studio if they ban ex-professional ballet dancers, or ex-professional jazz/contemporary dancers… would they ban a former gymnast from competing??? I believe that a former gymnast would have an advantage over most pole dancers.
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Kobajo84 brings up a valid discussion point. Can we disallow someone's participation in our business?
The answer is, surprisingly, a business can discriminate on many things. While its not generally considered good practice, our constitutional guarantee of "freedom of association" which is derived from our freedom to assemble, guaranteed by the first amendment, allows for businesses to discriminate on a surprising number of criteria with the notable exception being race.
You can establish an insurance agency for declared members of a particular religion, you could have a store in which only women are allowed, you could have a restaurant that only serves patrons over a certain age and you can most definitely disallow exotic dancers from coming to your studio.
There are of course notable exceptions to this rule regarding things like employment, housing and essential services but in general you can decide who you want in your establishment.
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There's a studio here that used to refuse service to anyone who danced. Imagine my surprise when I saw one of their instructors at a club LOL. They got over that, quickly.
I agree with Katana. If you're going to bar people who have an advantage, don't segregate it to only one. If you had previous dance experience (jazz, tap, contemp, ballet, etc) then you shouldn't be allowed to enter, either. Gymnasts are the same way.
If they're less worried about experience and more worried about the stigma, I'd remind them that major competitions allow former dancers, as long as they aren't current. You can start by listing Jenyne, Pantera, and Alethea. Given that this is a studio, not the USPDA, I don't see why you should have to relinquish any adult titles. No one should force you to give up or hide something that has and will always be a major part of pole dance. If they want to ignore that, and pretend it's all about fitness, maybe your views and the studios just don't match and you can convince another studio in the area to have a showcase?
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Wow I would never support a studio like that with my business.
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Look at Tinu's competition that runs in the fall. Nicki Shaw was asked to stepped down or change careers if she wanted to compete. How are you going to tell someone that they have to give up their profession for their hobby? USPDF states you can being a former stripper and compete – they are one of the top leading competitions and they allow it.
We all know being a former stripper has nothing to do with getting an edge over amateur pole dancers. Its not like your gonna strip down naked mid performance!
I say from past experience of running into situations semi-like this – one door is going to close and the next one opens right up.
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I always understood the distinction to be the same as amateur versus professional in any other kind of sporting competition: it wasn't considered fair to have people who practice for pay, and can dedicate their entire life to perfecting a sport pitted against those who are holding down day jobs and competing for fun and passion.
Although, I can see how it might make less sense in pole than it might in say, hockey, or weightlifting, because, as you say, the professionals often do not perform many tricks and aren't really encouraged to. I see this as another case where taking something from an artistic/theatre world and applying a sporting competition filter to it is causing conflict.
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Wow! This is an important social theme here for the entire pole community, I think. I love pole dance as an art form and a sport and have only been poling for a year. I have never been a dancer of any sort before in my life. I would’ve never thought I would be participating in any activity that carried such a negative stigma. It is that stigma from which I see the entire community wants to move away. However, there remains the proverbial elephant in the room.
I have found our local pole studio to be so different from the rest of the world. I have been so fortunate to be accepted by and learn from such an amazing group of people. We are from all walks there… I have never really gotten to know anyone who has made a living working in a gentle men’s club before. But I have now. And I’m so thankful that I have them as friends. It’s helped me gain a lot of perspective about how I’m seen and accepted and how I need to return that show of love.
TroubledWaters, I admire your integrity and you won’t be sorry for hanging on to it. Yes, you are being singled out. What I see happening here isn’t about what skill you have or have not. Rather, it’s about the ‘stigma’… Like it has been noted, no other trained athletes (dancer or not) is being excluded from this competition. You apparently are on a higher rung on the ladder than those who are organizing the competition. They are going to need you at some point, but that doesn’t mean you have to stick around for them. The rules they are making are like a tree deciding that it’s roots are offensive and so trying to grow without them. Even an recovering addict has to recognize where he or she came from, right?
I’ve had folks be really offended because I go to pole dance classes and they get really angry about it with me, but they don’t really know what it is. I forgive them their ignorance and I will not let them rob me of my goals.
There’s tons I could write here… In the end, I think pole is about embracing your life and empowering yourself to live it. Those who want to pretend that there’s no elephant in the room will find themselves stuck dealing with that elephant while the rest of us go on to enjoy the fruits of our labors. Find another studio that is accepting of everything that you are and doesn’t make it so you feel you have to ‘protect’ yourself from judgement. That’s not growth and I think it’s bad for the pole community to exclude certain populations in it’s membership…
LOVE TO YOU SISTAH!!
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I had no idea that this sort of thing happened!!!!! I am by far the most conservative pole studio in my area, and I absolutely have working entertainers come to my studio. They are welcomed with open arms by me. Everyone should be valued and supported regardless of their income source.
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I had no idea this sort of thing happened either! A pole studio not being accepting of exotic dancers? Acceptance is one of the things I love about the pole community. I understand trying to separate yourself from the stigma but the dancer is not the stigma. Society may put a scarlet letter on exotic dancers but one would think that a pole studio would be above that. That's a shame. I understand having guidelines for what is acceptable in a competition but forbidding current and former exotic dancers from competing makes them no better than any non poler who "slut shames." Bad form.
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I’ve never understood the concept of breaking through barriers by putting up more of them. Basically, by doing such things, they tell society that there is something wrong with pole dancing. Any idea how laughable and hypocritical it seems to non-polers when people make these ridiculous rules? Get OVER yourselves, snobby didn’t-quite-make-it-as-an-Olymic-gymnast-or-ballerina-supreme. Having a closed mind yourself is not going to open the door to changing popular opinion. Quit rejecting the talent and support pole ALREADY HAS in favor of winning over the people who hate it.
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*Olympic
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Ok, putting former gymnasts and ballerinas down is no better than preventing exotic dancers from competing. That just adds to the “us vs them” environment. I’ve heard a former exotic dancer say no one except strippers should teach pole…that’s not right (or nice).
I can see requiring an exotic dancer to compete in the professional level if and ONLY if she competed in a club’s pole-focused competition and was paid. Other than that, she’s should be able to compete–and in whatever category fits.
Seems like a lot more tolerance is needed in the pole world. Live and let live.
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