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I’m 15 and I want to pole so bad I can’t see straight but….
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Being a good parent means raising a child to be able to stand on her own two feet in the world, so you don't need to worry about hurting your mom's feelings by leaving. She has a husband for companionship, and you have a life to live.
I think your dad doesn't know what else to talk to you about..i mean, it's not like they can ask about friends of hobbies (because they don't allow you either).
I think you can set up a facebook account with a fake name. Add people who your brother can't 'steal' from you. It's like you have no visibility in the world and hardly any outside contacts, so meeting people online could help you a lot.
When they asked you why you didn't date…would your parents LET you date other guys? I think if they ask again, you can just tell them plainly how the situation is, what you told us about not being driven anywhere, not being allowed to get a license, etc. Your parents are essentially holding you prisioner and controling you to a very high degree. If I were a social worker, i'd be a lot more concerned about that than you sleeping with an older guy. In fact, to me, it would explain the whole story. You could tell them about the sex and marriage rule and how you hoped it would get you out of the house.
Of course righ now you have no place to go. you're only 15 and have no friends or teachers. That's why i think part time work and getting to know some people there can be a way of getting connections, asking around, so that when the time comes you have options.
xxxxx
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I would also like to echo NightFall in that starting to gain some skills to help you become independent & starting to save some money is the best thing you can do right now. I would caution you to do whatever you can to maintain control over as much of your money as possible. Based on what you are saying, I could see them trying to “keep” your money for you. Then, not allowing you to use it to go out on your own.
I can understand how you feel to an extent. Although not as severe of a situation, I faced my own parental troubles. At age 12 I had to ask my dad to take custody from my mom due to horrible home conditions, then ended up leaving his house at age 16 because life there was so overbearing that I couldn’t really stand it anymore.
I ended up working 60 hours a week (waiting tables, bar tending, retail, day care, whatever I could find) & taking full time classes in college to make my way in the world. I guess I’m just trying to tell you that life is full of tough choices, but if you are strong and have a decent brain in your head, you can make it through almost anything.
Although times are tough, this will pass. Once you make it through the other side, you can take great pride in everything you have managed to accomplish. Keep your head up, and focus on all of the wonderful things in your future. Hopefully, one day your parents will accept how you choose to live your life & even grow to be proud of you. Mine did.
Never, ever let your depression get the best of you. I lost my oldest sister to suicide when I was 17, and words cannot describe how difficult that has been for our family to cope with. All of the unanswered questions and lost opportunities haunt me with every passing holiday, birthday, anniversary of her death. If you ever feel things are hopeless, please reach out to someone, even if you have to call a hotline. People love you more than you could ever know.
Stay strong. You have it in you.
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This is very personal,but I am this girl;or was 4 years ago. I moved out in May,MY LIFE IS SOOOOO DIFFERENT.My bf set up my pole today….I wouldn’t be here without you girls encouraging me way back. Thank you . ps,I am permanently locked out of that old account
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