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I have had my fair share of breakups so I know how you feel, they can really be devastating but you should use this time to focus on yourself…in particular I liked to do things that my ex hated like wear love spell perfume! He hated it! Lol 🙂 definitely use the pole as an outlet and try to channel your feelings through your dancing. Also taking up a new hobby can be good as well especially if it’s an activity that’s mostly male, you can be the center of all their attention! I have had some breakups where I almost couldn’t drag myself out of bed, but you will get through this and I know it’s hard to see past this guy but your mr right IS out there. after the Last breakup I had from an on and off 2 year relationship I signed up for plentyoffish.com per my aunts suggestion because it’s free and that’s how she met her husband, and I ended up meeting the live of my life on it and I am much happier with him than the other idiots I dated!!! Not saying your ex is an idiot but I promise you someone else will come along and I feel you can only attract positive people in your life if you yourself give off positive energy. Keep your chin up, spend time with your family/friends you may have been busy to spend time with during the relationship. Or volunteer at an animal shelter so you can give love to the doggies and cats. Check out a book called “it’s called a breakup because it’s broken” it has a lot of good advice and by the end you will have a whole new outlook on things. it just takes time and the easiest way is no contact, it’s very hard to do this but if you can then after 2 weeks you will start feeling a little better, and as time goes on it will get easier. This part was very hard for me so I kept a list of people I could call at any time of night or day instead if I had the urge to call him. Hell, call a sex line if you’re really desperate just don’t call him! Good luck and stay strong, you can do this.

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Yikes!!! I am not married yet…but my boyfriend's family is from another town and we've been together for a year and a half and i still haven't met his family for that same reason…you saw him at the show so you can see from his appearance that we both are "out there" and his family doesnt care for that so i can only imagine how they'd feel about my pole, thank goodness everyone i am around is supportive, i am very lucky https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_wink.gif\

 

buuuuut in your case….i know you didnt really ask for advice but if you want to resolve the issue somewhat for reasons of your peace of mind then maybe you and your husband or SIL can sit down with her and tell her she doesn't have to love it but you would her to at least be RESPECTFUL to you…especially in your own house and in front of your child!!! She should want to set a good example for her granddaughter or at least I would think so and little kids sometimes can pick up on emotional tension etc. I don't think it's unreasonable of you to ask her to at least not talk about it with you since she doesnt seem to be open to understanding why you do it, that's probably the most you could get out of her, but considering you are both adults and have an impressionable little girl in the picture as well, she should realize that as her DIL and mother of her grandchild she does owe you at least basic politeness…and if she still won't budge just start bringing the pole to family functions https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif my dad was not too jazzed about me poling when i first started but now he understands what it's about, so hopefully your MIL can make at least enough of a change to not give you trouble about it…good luck!!

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Hey Lindsay you actually live about 20 minutes from me! I would check out Tease studio, my friend Jillian is an instructor there and she's fab. Let me know if you want to get together to play around sometime!

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I have never used it personally but remember different bc has different effects on everyone so you might not gain weight and it's a fairly non-committal bc so if you do you could just stop it and look for alternative methods…I have heard the shot is notorious for weight gain and mood swings but I have never tried either myself so I can't say for sure.

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i would kill for her abs!!! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif

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Oh honey you did amazing and you shouldn't feel bad at all!!!! My routine went pretty smoothly but I also forgot a few moves I wanted to include and I only did the "safe" moves that I know I could do in my sleep, I have more complicated tricks in my bag but I was too scared to do them for fear of something going horribly wrong so I feel you on that. I was more nervous about using a 50mm since i have a 45 and my hands sweating than I was about performing! It took a lot of courage just to get up there to begin with and the TG handspring you busted out was amaaaazing! I didn't even know you cut your routine a little short until you said something so I'm sure everyone just thought that was where the routine was supposed to end you played it off very well https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_wink.gif you can tell you have worked hard for that smokin hot body of yours, youve got 15 years on me and i look like i just gave birth to triplets hehe! everyone has slip ups even the pole pros…remember you are your own worst critic and 99% of the time people don't notice the things you think are really obvious, i guarantee everyone had respect for you for getting up there and doing your thing, keep rockin that pole girlfriend!

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Oh my goodness I had SUCH a great time! Charley was an amazing and extremely organized hostess everything ran so smoothly, all the performers did amazing, everyone was super nice and I got to meet so many people I didn’t know at all and people Ive been dying to meet! All the girls performers and their entourages were amazing, and I had such a fun time doing my routine I was nervous for no reason once I got up there I had a ball I hope anyone watching over chat liked it 🙂 and everyone was so nice for cheering for me so much, I don’t think my performance would have gone nearly as well without all the awesome positive energy the crowd and my fellow pile family were sending me

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Oook I have an update for you guys!!!! I emailed the owner (we will call her J) on Tuesday saying I wanted to cancel my audition because of where it was located and I also wanted to ask her why they were holding it there in the first place, I basically told her I was still interested in the job but uncomfortable dancing in a club for the audition.

My audition was scheduled for 4 pm yesterday, I have school from 9-12AM…I get out of class and check my phone and I had 2 missed calls, one voicemail and one text from the girl I spoke to to set up the audition (we will call her S)….but two days before I had emailed her partner J to tell her I wanted to cancel so either she never got my email or she read it and didn't communicate it to S…either way I was really annoyed these people were blowing up my phone while I was at school wtf?!?! And it was totally unnecessary because I made sure to tell them two days before the audition was supposed to be scheduled because I didn't want to cancel it at the last minute and be a jerk and inconvenience them so I wanted to give them plenty of notice, I guess that didn't work!

So I finally texted S back and re-explained everything I had already said in the email i sent to J, I told her I was in class so couldn't check my phone and said the same exact things I had said in my email J never told her about. She never responded and my audition time came and went so I know she got my text I just assumed they were offended and forgot about the whole thing.

Then around 7 pm I get a phone call from J (the main owner) saying "Hi I just got your email and I wanted to let you know I totally understand your concern about the location, but the time we had scheduled you for is before they are open. Our studio is under construction right now so that's why we had to schedule it at the club. You can come meet me at my office in downtown Chicago if you still want to meet, why don't you just call me back at this number so we can chat"

 

….???? Ok if that's the case why wasn't all of this explained to me at the very beginning?!? I feel kinda put off by the fact that J didn't pass along my email to S and if they would have explained to me why they had the audition in a club I would have been a little more open to the idea but they just told me a time and place to meet them which I think is strange.  The club is still in a not great neighborhood and they said the owner of the place would be there as well so obviously there would be a guy around, I'm sure he is professional but the whole situation just makes me uncomfortable. So now I'm wondering what I should do, my boyfriend said to just forget it and wait for the next opportunity plus I do makeup and wedding season is coming so I know that will keep me busy for sure. What do you guys think? I feel a little better about the situation but i still have no idea why they didn't tell me any of this information until I asked??? 

 

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I emailed her earlier today and she hasn't responded, she was very quick to get back to me before though so I'm assuming she's read it and is deciding how to/if she should respond sooo we'll see what happens i guess….the audition was for 4pm so i would think the club would be open during that time, its a bar/restaurant kinda place as well

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Thanks everyone for your responses! I emailed her and tried my best not to come off as a jerk but I basically said I was uncomfortable auditioning at that particular bar so I want to cancel my interview, and I also asked why they were holding the audition at that particular place. It's marketed as a bar but it's definitely a strip club but I didn't say anything about it being in a bad neighborhood or anything like that, I just wanted to focus on my being uncomfortable about the setting, I also made it a point to tell her I wasn't comfortable dancing in front of anyone except her and the other instructors…isn't that how it usually works?! Last week I applied for an instructor position and before the interview I came to find out they weren't looking for instructors they were looking for girls to dance on poles on stages and then "mingle with the crowd and sell drinks" umm that is not a pole instructor position lol. Last spring I spoke with a studio that wanted to hire me after just one phone conversation and didn't even ask to see me dance so i turned them down because I was sketched out that they would hire me without even auditioning me……then I had the debacle where that studio kept saying they wanted me to teach but then hired a girl that looked like a barbie doll stripper (aka total opposite of me) behind my back and had her start teaching the classes instead!!! There's some force that obviously doesn't want me to teach!!!!!!!!!!

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Thanks for the replies everyone! I'm most likely going to order a 3 and get a sample of 2 and 4. I have used level 2 from my friends' jar and I don't think I sweated it off my hands, but I also tried to plan out my routine for the show so I'm on/off the pole with enough time for my hands to dry in between. I've never performed and when I get nervous my hands get cold and tingly and don't sweat at all so I'm hoping that happens this time it would be a big help! I've stayed away from performing live partly because of my grip problems so I hope my sweaty palms stay under control for five minutes while I'm on stage…not so much to ask!!! hehe

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Wow Erin that was ridiculously rude….why are you even on this site if you have that kind of stuff to say about Veena? Also, you were the one that started picking the fights so in no way was anyone trying to start arguing with you. I think you should have reconsidered how you went about trying to "warn" everyone about this competition, you really just sound like a bitter sore loser, and you really shouldn't take it out on any of us.  

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Did anyone think of using Veena especially since this is her site you're using to ask for help? https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_wink.gif

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I actually have the opposite problem my bf doesn't really care to watch but I think it's because when we met I already had been doing it for quite some time and when I told him about it I really emphasised the fitness aspect of it so i think he never saw it as sexy to begin with. But maybe you can split up your practices like doing harder moves on your own for 2/3 of it and then he can come watch for a bit at the end while you just get your sexy on? Maybe this way you can both comprimise and you still get your alone time and he gets his sexy time? good luck 🙂

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It most likely has to do with the cut you have, you might want to ask your stylist to lighten up some of the bulk toward the middle/bottom of your hair which would help it lay better and probably help with tangles, try that and see if it works? good luck!