[Runemist34]

I’ve been poling for 6 years, nearly 7 now I think… and barely been able to do a basic invert in all that time!
My biggest thing was training off the pole (with weights and such) so that I didn’t push myself too hard with moves I couldn’t do yet… and also actually pushing myself enough that I end up sore the next day, or the day after that, so that I knew I worked hard, and that my muscles were getting stronger!
These days, the most gains I’ve made have been these techniques. I’ve made a list of “easier” moves to work on, like climbs (which I’ve been doing a long time), spins, and such… and just made a commitment to perfect them, add some finesse, and truly learn all I can from these moves! Even if I can already do them, I knew there was much more to learn.
So, take it from me: Patience! You don’t want to hurt yourself (which I have done!) because that sucks. But, you don’t want to be too gentle, either. Gotta learn your own body, and find out what’s best for you!

[Runemist34]

Sounds like you need to save your video as a different file type! Files that are too big, or ones that are specific to a program, won’t be able to go onto the website, or played by the player on here.

[Runemist34]

Catsanctuary177663, I’m feeling that communication has broken down, and I can no longer participate in this topic in good conscience with regards to my health.
I respectfully disagree with you, but cannot move further this discussion.

[Runemist34]

Casi, as I have said- twice before this- I don’t think that taking medication is a bad thing. I don’t think it’s shameful, and I don’t think that it’s a “bad option” or somehow that people should feel like they should avoid it if it’s the only thing that has helped them.
If I have sounded accusatory or shaming, then that was not in any way my intent, and will never be.
I suppose I am simply trying to offer an alternate route to health and well-being.

[Runemist34]

Poleisnewtome… that’s sort of what I meant. The “underlying problem” of WHY you are depressed, of learning to pull yourself out of it, on your own, in your own way. Learning what is perpetuating it, learning how to combat it, and learning the lessons needed to grow from the experience. Changing the way you live your life, and learning how to take care of your needs… so that depression need not return.
Like I said, there are people who truly believe in medication, and I understand. My method is not for everyone, and it is a very hard, and long road. As much as you may have conviction for your method, I have for my own.
And, I think that’s the point. We both feel very strongly about the methods we’ve chosen that have helped us… because they have helped us! And that’s all we really want or need. 🙂

[Runemist34]

I don’t want to bring more difficulties to this discussion… but I must warn against the use of medication in a “long-term or indefinite” sense.
Medication CAN be a great way to get you feeling motivated and back on your feet. Medication CAN help you feel happier, healthier, and somewhat normal.
However, it CANNOT fix the underlying problem.
I realize that very many people believe in medication, and very many people see depression as a nigh-permanent problem with the brain. I must respectfully disagree.
All things psychological are biological. This is true. If you have depression, it is both a psychological and biological problem- in so many ways, our own thinking changes the state and nature of our brains. Our common hobbies change how our brains work. The way we look at the world changes how our brains function… and also, how our brains function can change the way we look at the world.
All of this is true, but what is NOT true is that medication is infallible, or completely researched. Unfortunately, medical science is still unsure of how our brain chemicals act in a whole and complete way. We have not “mapped the brain” yet. Playing with our dopamine levels, our seretonin reuptake, our norepinephrine or endorphins, can have catastrophic effects… or, maybe they can have great effects.
I’m not intending to scare you, or tell you to end your time on medication. Medication can be extremely helpful, and in many cases, it is successful in helping people feel better.
But, playing with your brain chemicals is a very temporary and expensive solution to an issue you can permanently fix. You can carry that permanent fix over into other areas of life and continue to benefit from over and over again as you age.
I think that finding a good professional counsellor is very important, but it can be difficult. You need someone who is willing to go on YOUR journey, rather than someone who is taking you on a journey they think you’re on. Difficult, but… invaluable once you find it.
And… yes, remember that you aren’t alone in this struggle, you aren’t doing anything wrong. The struggle may be yours, and yours alone… but there are very many of us who have been there, felt similarly, and who are all here to support you.

And in the end, it is YOUR CHOICE to take advice, and drop advice. I know that not a single person here would be offended if you decided not to listen to them.

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
I am so sorry to hear that you’re struggling with this problem. I, also, have had a long history with depression. My mum says that I reached depression around the age of 8, and I know that I didn’t get out of it till I was around 22, so… that’s a really long time. And, a long time that I refused drugs, refused anything that didn’t currently exist in my body, and that I never exercised. Counselling was a lot of misses, for me, till I found one big hit… one wonderful woman who told me practically the opposite of everything I’d been taught, and that society teaches you.
The two most major things that helped me with depression were these:
First, you are allowed to be depressed. No, you may not “have anything to be depressed about,” but that doesn’t have anything to do with what you’re feeling. People’s judgements about your feelings aren’t relevant, because they aren’t going to change how you feel. Taking this slightly further, you aren’t going to be damaged by feeling depressed! Yes, it hurts (and boy do I know how much it hurts), and yes, it can prevent you from feeling like getting out of bed, or participating in your day… but it won’t cause you harm that you cannot fix. So, you are allowed to be depressed- you are even allowed to, as my counsellor said, “Have it over for tea.” Invite it in, let it have it’s time in your body, and then once it’s stayed long enough, you can gently have it leave.
This first step was revolutionary for me. I struggled and fought for years and years, but it was only this that helped. Feeling depressed is horrible, and I’m not meaning to diminish your experience of it- quite the contrary. You are allowed to feel a feeling, regardless as to whether it has a “place of origin,” and you are allowed to expand with that feeling, so that you can encompass life as well as depression.
It takes practice. I worked at it for a long time, but the practice of it is more rewarding than I can currently express.

Second, and this may just be something that helped ME (but I’ll tell you just in case it does help you), I started writing down all the things that made me happiER that happened in the day. Not happy, because that wasn’t possible for me at the time. Just slightly happier than I was before the thing happened… even if that “happier” is more like “somewhat less depressed.” Everything from discovering a can of rootbeer in the back of the fridge, to sweet gestures from my family or boyfriend, to the flowers blooming on the side of the road. ANYTHING. I started with like, three… and eventually made it up to ten a day. By that time depression had become a kind of “habit,” a way of thinking that I didn’t know how to get rid of. This is how I got rid of it.

Exercise has been absolutely vital to my mental health, and I suffer without it. Most people find that exercise can truly make the difference, and even if you don’t really feel up to a proper workout, even something small can help.

One of the more recent things I’ve also been exploring is meditation. I have a fairly pervasive anxiety disorder (which I covered with my depression, until the depression became a problem unto itself), and spending fifteen minutes before I go to sleep, but while I’m in bed, has been really helpful. Not only does it help me go to sleep, but it also teaches me to relax, to allow myself to detach from the thoughts that aren’t helpful to me (and even evaluate if some thoughts are helpful or not), and just… spend some time, breathing, quiet, awake but relaxed.

Please feel free to talk to me if you feel you need help. I don’t want to just throw everything I could suggest at you… it would be overwhelming to both of us!
I am one of the few people who believe that these ailments aren’t part of our being… they’re curable, they’re not permanent.
So… keep fighting. You can do it 🙂

[Runemist34]

I suspect that this thread may be of help: https://www.studioveena.com/forums/view/2989

And I would have to agree: Do it when your surgeon says it’s okay, and take things slowly!

[Runemist34]

Finding ceiling joists can be rather confusing, but trust me… they ARE there, and since they hold up your whole building, I’m sure they’ll be able to take the pressure of a pole. If not, there are much, much larger problems going on there!
Depending on your ceiling, finding them can be anywhere from super easy to crazy difficult. I have stucco ceilings (which I hate!) and they make the whole process much more difficult, because it can give false readings- in either positive or negative. I’ve also had ceilings made of thick wood board, which causes the stud finder to have a constant positive. I could basically have put my pole literally anywhere on that one, but I chose to get a longer screw and put my Lil Mynx under an actual joist, just to be certain.
There are some clues you can look for- if you take a step back and look along your ceiling, sometimes you can see “which way they run” by seeing how your ceiling might dip and undulate. You can also take some lights out of the ceiling and stick your hand in there and actually feel around for them, too.
Keep at it, though. Not all stud finders are equal, and sometimes it just takes a little extra testing to find a good one!

[Runemist34]

I actually am in the same boat: I never played sports, didn’t take any physical risks, didn’t roughhouse with anyone. No broken or sprained things. I certainly didn’t trust my body from a very early age!
I find that “trying to put it out of your head” can be a bit of a problem. I have an anxiety disorder, so the things I’m afraid of are large and come up often in my life. I’ve been to counselling a lot, and the advice I’ve gotten has changed over the years.
Specifically, I was taught “thought stopping” when I was young, which is basically just trying to tell your thoughts to stop, to end, and to try to “put it out of your head,” instead of running around with it and fretting.
For me, this didn’t work. I ran myself into such a tight circle, worrying about how I couldn’t stop my thoughts, and how I couldn’t stop thinking about how I couldn’t stop my thoughts (and so on) that I could barely function at all. One of my more insightful counsellors actually commented that I had stopped breathing properly, likely as a result of this. She told me not to do it anymore, it’s just winding me up.
Instead, the more common advice these days is to allow yourself to feel afraid, but not to get caught up in it. YES, you feel afraid- of course you do! Doing something outside of your comfort zone is scary. Sometimes we can run away with this fear, imagine all the bad things that come up out of it, and the fear increases.
So, instead, allow the feeling of fear, but practice mindfulness and self-watching, allowing your fear to be part of your experience, but not the ONLY part. Allowing those thoughts of being afraid to happen, but not getting caught by them. They’re natural, but you don’t have to entertain them as something serious and truthful.

But, whatever you decide to do, I hope that it works for you! Dealing with fears is really challenging, and obviously, there are a lot of schools around it that differ, or even contradict. It all has to do with what works for you!

[Runemist34]

I actually share this fear- I’ve been afraid of being upside down for a long time. It holds me back, and yes, I know that I am strong enough.
For example, I know that I’m strong enough to do a Cross ankle release, and I can do them from the ground with NO problem, lifting myself up into a sit from that position. But, can I do it after climbing? Nope. No way.
Doing basic inverts, and into things like the inverted crucifix, scares me even more. I can see the ground, and I don’t trust that my arms will be able to help me if I fall, or that my body will know how to keep me safe.
But, as I said, I KNOW that I am strong enough. I’ve had instances of falling out of moves like Cross ankle release, and came away uninjured. I’ve fallen in many other ways, too- things like going really fast on roller blades when I was trying to learn, and hitting a rock. I flipped around in the air, and landed, continuing the momentum with the roll. Again, came out uninjured, though my jeans took a bit of a beating!
My body knows what to do. I am stronger than I think I am. Heck, my MOM did a forearm stand twice during yoga a couple weeks ago, and I’m way stronger than she is! But, the fear holds me back from a move that I want so much: a handstand, or forearm stand, anything like that.

Knowing how much I do about fear, the only and best advice is this: You must face it. Fears like this are all about reward. You are rewarding your brain by feeling the fear by avoiding the thing you’re afraid of- you’re reinforcing your belief that it is dangerous and “impossible.” Those feelings will simply grow, as is the way of these things, as you avoid them more and more.
However, what I don’t recommend is just jumping in and going at it, full force, and hoping that you’ll figure it out!
Take it slow, allow yourself to get used to the feelings of being inverted. Breathe slowly and deeply (this indicates to your brain and body that you are safe and able to relax), feel your muscles work, think about where you are in that moment. Allow yourself to marvel at how you are doing something amazing, scary, and beautiful.
Work on your exits, too. This can really help the “logical” part of your brain from getting caught up in those emotions, and telling you about all the horrible things that can happen to you. If you’re able to do a handstand, try practicing going from a handstand into moves that are more difficult. This way, you’ll be able to perform this “backwards” and get out of more difficult moves in a safe and familiar way. Practice transitioning into and out of the move, and focus on that aspect of the work, rather than how you’re doing that move.
And seriously, breathe. Whether you’re thinking about the move, doing the move, practicing parts of the move, or just doing anything related to it… remember to breathe deeply. The positive association does wonders.

[Runemist34]

Part of the reason I find dance so fascinating, I think, is that I see it as a sort of language. People can use dance to express their feelings, tell a story.
Similar to how we can explain “writing” as sequencing words into sentences, those sentences into paragraphs, and thus into pages, books, and such, I think it similar to dancing. We can make even the smallest turn of the hand into an expression of emotion, which is the same as using a particular word to convey a feeling within writing.
So, while the basic definition is accurate, it’s sort of like a basic framework to use. Everyone has their style, their voice, within both writing and dance 🙂

[Runemist34]

I’ve had really tight hamstrings most of my life, so I know how you feel!
I found that stretching, slowly and carefully, with both a straightened back and a rounded back, as well as flexed and pointed feet, allows me to feel more comfortable in a pike position doing whatever I may be doing.
I would also stress, seriously, the importance of patience. I’ve pushed the pike stretch before, and thought “Oh, if I just go a little further, it’ll be okay,” and it really wasn’t! I managed to damage both my hamstrings, and had to lay off all stretching for them for months and months.
Stretch, slowly, until you feel some discomfort. Just the littlest pull, and then stay there. Stretch when really warm, too. Try stretches from standing, sitting, and one leg at a time.
You’ll get there! No matter where you’re starting from, you’ll get there! I can touch the ground from standing now 😉 If I can do it, I know you can too!

[Runemist34]

Looks like the pole in that video is a custom job done by a theatre company (who does aerial tricks such as trapeze, also) called Flight or Fight Entertainment. That’s the only information I could find, from the video’s description.
I’ve honestly never seen anything like this in production, so I think you have to dish out the big bucks for a custom job!

[Runemist34]

You should check out Finding your Freestyle! Some of their earlier videos on Youtube are great challenges for getting used to freestyling, and changing things up.

[Runemist34]

I was going to do it yesterday, and ended up getting roped into helping the boyfriend with his paperwork (I didn’t mind so much, he’s paying me), and then I was gonna do it today, and I’m sick again!
Rawr!
I’ll catch up, I promise!

[Runemist34]

Also, @Tesar, you’re gorgeous and don’t need to get rid of anything!
Besides, for many women, that belly fat (and often hip fat) is the one thing your body wants to hold on to, quite dearly, because it’s healthier for us. We need a little jiggle to stay happy!
And your normal weight is what’s normal for you! My normal weight, without working out or running or anything, is just a bit above yours… and anything below that, I end up starving!

[Runemist34]

Polekat, that’s not a daft question!
I’ve been measured with a bra on, by someone who is really really good, and she got my size correct, even though the bra was the wrong size. I’m not exactly sure how 😉
However, at home, generally I actually do measure myself (or get my boyfriend to measure me, hah!) while naked.
A “true gague” is sort of hard, because like jeans, every bra maker will have slightly different ideas about what an inch is, apparently. Some will fit loose, some tight, some will be better for certain shapes of boobs, and some fairly universal.
The measurement is meant to give you a better idea of where you should be looking- also like jeans 😉
Good example of this is that my band size never seems to move unless I develop more lats, but my cup size is slightly more transient. Depending on the shape and type of the bra, I can either be a J, or a K, though I measure right at a J.

[Runemist34]

lol, you guys are so tall! I’m 5′ 7″ and about 200 lbs right now- gained the weight when I started running 😉 I have a pretty hearty bone structure, so I look fairly well-proportioned in comparison to my long legs, big chest, and large hips 😉
When I put my pole heels on though, I’m super tall. Like, super tall.
I mostly have very small friends though. Not sure how that worked out! I feel like some kind of massive amazon woman compared to most of the people I know!

[Runemist34]

Lol, Veena, at least you don’t have to worry about them getting in your way! Also, you could wear proper plate armor and still move 😉 haha
Besides, boobs or no boobs, you always look gorgeous 😉

[Runemist34]

Hey there!
Personally, I use a cheapish webcam, and record, edit, and export using Windows Movie Maker. It’s pretty basic, but it does a good job, and is relatively easy to figure out (especially with the help of Google!).
Using a phone, I have an iPhone, so I don’t think the files are saved or recorded in very large or complex types, which allows me to e-mail them to myself. It’s unfortunate to hear that Android is a bit more complicated… at least for the technological newbies like us 😉
I do have a more expensive video camera to use, but I haven’t felt that I need it at this time. Due to the frustrating lack of size of my recording space (my bedroom), I just figured it would be easiest to work with the basic webcam, instead of a proper video camera… which I will use when I have a bit more space, and maybe want a bit more detail 😉

[Runemist34]

I totally agree with the other two: These things take time, and you will progress at your pace, and no one else’s!
I’ve been poling for 6 years, but due to a lack of social encouragement (particularly from my ex), a lack of confidence (as in, I didn’t think I could really make any progress) and just general laziness (I preferred the comfort of the couch or my bed to the discomfort of getting used to a pole sit), I haven’t made much progress at all. I did, however, learn a LOT about my mind and body!
My “resting weight,” when I’m not working out or running, is between 165 and 175 lbs, and I’m 5′ 7″. My current weight, since starting running last year and getting into pole properly about six months ago, is now 200lbs. I haven’t gained any size- in fact, I’d say I’m losing some! I am, however, a lot stronger and more “dense” than I used to be. I got muscle, and I’m super happy with that 😉
So, don’t worry about your weight, don’t worry about how fast or slow you progress! After six years and barely being able to do a basic invert by the end of that time, I know that some people just take time.
And, I bet you anything you’ll take a lot shorter time than that to achieve a lofty goal like a basic invert! Even if it takes you a year, you’ll be about six times quicker than me 😉 haha

[Runemist34]

If you had a great experience at VS, and you fit into their bras, then all the power to you! I love looking at their stuff- it’s sort of one of those forever-longing things, though. I’ll never fit into them!
I’m glad to hear you’re happy and comfortable in your new bras, though! That’s exciting 🙂 I’m glad my information helped, and that everyone here helped encourage you to check it out!

[Runemist34]

I think measuring for band size above the boobs is kind of weird… considering the band isn’t going to be going over your boobs ever! Well, maybe except for certain times, but… those are times when the bra isn’t doing anything for you 😛
And I agree with Veena, sternums can be sexy too! A friend of mine is really small, not just in the chest but just generally- one of those quick, compact people! And she was doing pole instruction for a while, and I couldn’t get over how defined her pecs are! It definitely looked sexy, regardless as to how little her chest was 😉

[Runemist34]

KrazyKitty, you’ve also been suggesting to LilyG3013 on her forum, in which she says she has an Ulnar Deviation, to get a compression sleeve and be done with it… and now it’s “I don’t know what that is but it sounds worse”? You’re giving medical advice to a problem you know nothing about? That seems really horrible to me!!
And yeah, some compression on an unhappy tendon can FEEL good, but it doesn’t make the problem go away! Rehabilitating the tendon and muscle is the only way to properly and permanently heal tendonitis, and that also requires a lot of rest! I’ve had more tendonitis in my body than anyone else I know. It’s terrible, but I think I’ve done more than enough research, and learned enough from doctors and physiotherapists to be able to say that with some authority!
And no, not everyone gets tendonitis when they first start… nor SHOULD they ever get it! Proper training would prevent it from happening, and simply laying down and saying that everyone has to deal with it is NOT helping the problem at all!