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Where to put my pole when moving back in with parents?
Hey everyone….So today I found out I just got into my dream graduate school program!!! YAY!!! So I’ve been talking to my dad and he’s saying he’ll let me move back into his house for a while to save on money….This school is expensive and I won’t be able to work much, so this would be a great way to go to school without having like 50K in loans….HOWEVER….My dad is very very conservative and so having a pole in my room would be a definite no no…My only problem now is: I don’t want to be without my pole for so long https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_sad.gif
I’m trying to think of a place that I could have it so I could still practice, but can’t…My only other option would be to take classes at a studio (thats like 50 miles away), just so I can still practice…I don’t know anyone close to my dad’s house that would let me keep a pole up in their house…
Any suggestions?
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3 Replies
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Congrats on the grad school!
Is your pole removable or permanent??? Removable would make this a bit easier to solve…
Also does your dad know about you poling, or is it kinda a secret? If he already knows then maybe you could just ask him. If he doesn’t know, then you’ll have 2 issues to solve.
If he already knows, I’d say just flat-out ask him if he would mind. If you have a removable pole you could maybe tell him you’ll take it down when you’re not using it and that could be a compromise if he doesn’t like the idea. Maybe he has a garage or back room he never uses or something that you could put it in??
If he comes out with a definite "no", then I’m not sure what to tell you. I mean, grad school is definitely more important than poling; and I actually did rack up over 50K in student loans from 3 years of undergrad (and didn’t even finish), so I can tell you that the savings in money is a HUGE plus. You don’t want to be paying over $700 a month like I am in loans just so you can keep your pole… So in that case, I’d say you’d have to decide how important poling is to you: important enough to make the long drive every so often to practice or not?
I wish I had something more upbeat to say, so hopefully someone else can come up with a good idea for you…
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First of all, congrats on gettin in the grad school you wanted! Secondly, i agree with jacq 100% (and i’m sure you do too) that grad school is definately a huge priority. You can pole-dance forever, but grad school is temporary and of course it would be better off to do it now.
It sounds to me like your dad doesn’t know about you having a pole. I understand that he’s very conservative, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t tell him. And if he doesn’t accept it, well then you’ll just be back at point A, with one possible option eliminated, so you have nothing to lose.About telling him: it is EXTREMELY important the manner in which you bring it up. First impressions are the strongest and longest-lasting. If you seem nervous, or sound like it’s something naughty, or that you don’t think he’d approve, then chances are he’ll pick up on it and he’ll really think that there’s reason for him to not approve.
And whatever you do, don’t make it seem like a big deal (example " i have something that i need to talk with you about")- first reactions to that phrase are usually along the lines of "uh-oh, i’m gonna hear something baaad", and then this predisposition will actually cause the person to interpret the whole thing as something worse than if you hadn’t started off that way. Just be casual about it: say that you got a new exercise pole to work out on, and since you really like it, you’d like to put it up in your room, but you just want to make sure that he knows that it won’t mess up the ceiling in his house. This way, it sounds like you’re asking him for permission because the ceiling is an issue, and not his permission because it’s something provocative that he may not approve of. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif Take the attention away from the pole itself and what you do with it, and focus on the ceiling, the joist stuff, and how the equipment works on pressure. The more ‘normal’ you sound about it, the more normal he’ll perceive it to be. This may also be easier over the phone than in person. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cat.gif
If you don’t like this idea, you can always just straight out say how you feel.. that you’re worried he’s not going to allow it because he’s so conservative, but that really it makes you happy and keeps you in shape, or whatever else. I personally would just go with the first idea though, because it really isn’t something that should be a big deal. I’d tell you not to say anything, and to just casually put it up, but i assume you wouldn’t risk doing that. Bringing it up beforehand will be good for getting it off your chest sooner, and testing his reaction ahead of time. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_albino.gif
Don’t get me wrong- i don’t think we need to hide anything or be ashamed, need anyone’s approval, or even lie to people about pole-dancing, but sometimes it’s to our benefit in cases like these, to just say things in a different WAY, or to just focus on a certain feature.. especially to people who just won’t understand it in any other way, and super-especially if it will make the difference between being able to have a pole or not in someone else’s house. good luck and sorry this is soo long!!!
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Congrats on the grad school! During spring and summer I keep my pole in the garage (my dad won’t let me keep it in my room), I don’t know if that’s an option but its kinda nice to pole outside!
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