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I am so SICK of the negative stereotype surrounding pole!
It seriously pisses me off. Why cant people see that it doesn’t have to be trashy? I love poling! It makes me feel so much better about myself but people are constantly putting it down. I cant stand it. AAAAHHHHHH!!!!
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16 Replies
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Hi queenie…
I’m assuming someone said something to really upset you?? just remember that we are the enlightened ones, the strong ones and the ones who are loving living our lives https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif times are changing – it’s just going to take a long time for people to realise that it doesn’t have to be ‘trashy’ or ‘sleazy’ or automatically make you a bad person. If people close to you can’t accept that this is a part of your life then it’s time to reconsider why you have them in your life – there are more important things in this life to worry about than how someone keeps fit and boosts their self-esteem.
Now i’m getting annoyed too!! grr!! Big hugs!
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It is going to take some time before changes happen with attitude, and like other things there will always be someone out there no matter what that disapproves. I guess what I’ve learned is that we all have different likes, dislikes, and interests….and that because we are diverse as a people, that will always be the case. SOOO having said that, I choose to accept someone else’s viewpoint/thoughts for they are…opinions/beliefs owned by them, and that I don’t have to agree with them anymore then they have to agree with me. By continuing to be a good person, the strong woman I am….I don’t need to explain/try to convince anyone to "MY" way of seeing things. I just need to continue to be an example and treat them with courtesy…that is what is working for me now. It’s kind of like the old adage..you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar!! I also love what my "Grams" used to say…"Your opinion is of NO CASH value to me!" LOL I hope it gets better for you hun!! HUGZ
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I understand but unfortunately that will NEVER happen…just as stereotypes about people with tattoos/piercings, single mothers etc still linger around. I guess I just like being part of the "black sheep" lol Also, remember that people who believe the stereotypes are idiots! They don’t know better. My husband was still in the dark about pole until I made him go with me to the USPDF comp this weekend. NOW, after two years, he understands it a lot more!
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oh honey! a few weeks ago i had someone come into my home & tell me that i was an attention whore because i have a pole in my home https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gif seriously pissed me off, i’m sure you can imagine, lol! but you know what? we (pole people) know better! & we know how hard it is & how great it makes us feel && what a wonderful workout it is https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif the only thing any of us can do is just keep on poling & show our strength, if someone challenges your opinion on it you can show them some hard moves, or show them a tasteful pole video with a lot of hard tricks in it. i just sat there like an idiot because i was stunned https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif i didn’t even defend myself https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_confused.gif that was mainly because it was my boyfriends sister (now my ex boyfriend) & i didn’t want to fuss with someone who could have been my family at some point… looking back, i really wish i had asked her to go try a easy move, like a fireman spin or something easy like that because we all know its harder than it looks & i think it would have changed her tone.
i hope & pray pole gets into the olympics because i know that would change a lot of peoples minds about it & show that it doesn’t have to be seductive. -
Don’t worry about what others think. If it is negative it should motivate you to prove them wrong, either with education or by demonstration. Thats one reason why I love to pole dance, because I know its controversial and people will make a big deal of it and I can say oh well I’m having fun and your’re missing out. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif
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That’s why I love me some shay shay…" I’m having fun and you’re missing out!" Too cute but well said.
Don’t worry about what others think. If it is negative it should motivate you to prove them wrong, either with education or by demonstration. Thats one reason why I love to pole dance, because I know its controversial and people will make a big deal of it and I can say oh well I’m having fun and your’re missing out. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif
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I hear ya!
Last year the principal had a meeting with me because some parent complained that they found my facebook page and my profile pic was me hanging upside down on the pole. It was a very nice gymnast shot, not a slutty shot. And this parent said I was a stripper and didn’t want me teaching her kids. LOL! I didn’t get into trouble after explaining things to him. Thank god! LOL! So now I don’t use my real full name online anymore.
I think I have some real thick skin and I just don’t care what people think of me anymore. I wouldn’t worry because I really think Pole Dancing is going to be an exercise norm in the next couple of years. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif
I was on the news last year helping new pole dancing studio defend their studio. LOL! People wanted the studio out of the area because they think the studio was a strip club lol or they thought the logo made it look like a strip club. My avatar is a screen cap from the news with the title, Too Sexy?? LOL! Love it.
http://www.twitvid.com/B5F74" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
http://www.twitvid.com/776B2" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; -
I know it’s a real pain in the ass. Most of the time when people learn about me pole dancing it’s all a big laugh, yeah they think i’m doing stripper style pole dance. I had to show some video and explain…a lot.
We are doing a sport that is changing so quickly that they didn’t realise what it became. 10 year ago it was only for stripper (mostly) they 5 year ago they did get the pole out of the club but to teach how to be sexy. That’s a big step, now they just start to realise that it is atletic and beautiful.
I don’t take it as a insult anymore, i don’t even say i do pole fitness, don’t feel the need for it. But i did take it as a challenge, to prove all those people they are wrong. They don’t need to like it but they need to respect me and what i do.
I already say it but i want a T-shirt that say Pole dance: if you can’t do it, don’t judge it!
next step is the bumper sticker https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gif -
oh honey! a few weeks ago i had someone come into my home & tell me that i was an attention whore because i have a pole in my home https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gif seriously pissed me off, i’m sure you can imagine, lol! but you know what? we (pole people) know better! & we know how hard it is & how great it makes us feel && what a wonderful workout it is https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif the only thing any of us can do is just keep on poling & show our strength, if someone challenges your opinion on it you can show them some hard moves, or show them a tasteful pole video with a lot of hard tricks in it. i just sat there like an idiot because i was stunned https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_surprised.gif i didn’t even defend myself https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_confused.gif that was mainly because it was my boyfriends sister (now my ex boyfriend) & i didn’t want to fuss with someone who could have been my family at some point… looking back, i really wish i had asked her to go try a easy move, like a fireman spin or something easy like that because we all know its harder than it looks & i think it would have changed her tone.
Wow, that was not only rude to automatically assume something about you without even knowing it for a fact but it was rude to come into your home and say it. People should always respect someone in their own home because they would expect respect in theirs. She apparently doesn’t know you good at all, else she wouldn’t have thought that but it could possibly be a jealousy issue. All dancers are fit and people, especially guys notice that so it possibly urked her to see a pole there and called you a name to make herself feel better.
Maybe make a dedication just for her, with all your best moves in it https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_wink.gif En Vogue’s Free Your Mind seems to be a good song to dance to actually, especially if you’re dedicating the vid to people who are hating on you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i7iQbBbMAFE&ob=av2e
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I already say it but i want a T-shirt that say Pole dance: if you can’t do it, don’t judge it!
next step is the bumper sticker https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_twisted.gifOr a ‘You Tube is not a free strip club’.
I deal with the crap but I give them a big dose of WTFE (wtf ever!) and move on with my life. If you dont like it then dont watch me! I have no time to be spend with negitive energy!
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I can relate and get frustrated at times, but have learned to let it go. People judge what they do not understand. I use to dance at a stripclub and when I say danced, I actually danced, not just shake my butt. I worked my ass off doing pole tricks and was in the best shape of my life. I was also judged, lost people who I thought were friends, but it let it empower me. I knew who I was and what I was. Plus, I had a college education to pay for, and I graduated with no college debt! https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif I always found it funny when people said nasty things cause I see just as bad stuff on tv and movies. Plus half the girls that were so negative were the same girls at the nightclub dancing all sluty after a few drinks and going home with random men. But I was the whore, not them! I just recently started taking pole classes after three years of being off the pole and even though it is in a studio and my own home, I was told how brave I am for doing it and posting pictures of me doing pole tricks. Is it that bad? Since I started back I have lost 15 pounds, toned up and am happy (I love my pole!). In the end, who cares, if I am not affecting your life, does it matter. I just smile now knowing that out there somewhere is a person that I have irked. Part of me loves being defiant.
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Just wanted to share a positive story that pole dancing is making progress–
Today I was casually talking to an older co-worker (I’m 29 and I think she’s in her 50’s). She asked me about activities I enjoy. I just said that I work out at a dance studio. She asked me the name of it and where it was. I went ahead and told her because it’s not like it’s called ‘The Pole Dance Studio’ and you wouldn’t really know what it is unless you did a little research. Sure enough though, she said "Oh, the one that does that does pole dancing and other stuff." She acted sort of nonchalant about it, like it was no big deal. It felt pretty good that she already knew what it was and treated me the exact same as if I said I was into spinning, yoga, etc. https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_biggrin.gif The world needs more people like this lady. To her credit, she does seem pretty hip and open-minded. One time in the past, I invited my husband, who had huge dreadlocks, to my work Christmas party, and this co-worker told me that she thought he was handsome.
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the girl who said all of this has known me for 14 years https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif & i had been with her brother for almost 6 years. she knows me pretty good & just thinks i "put up a front" for his family. thats not true at all. i am myself always https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif sometimes i tone it down a little (like at work) but everyone i know knows about my pole dancing, even my grandma & my 77year old great aunt who watches my videos on facebook https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif
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the girl who said all of this has known me for 14 years https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_eek.gif & i had been with her brother for almost 6 years. she knows me pretty good & just thinks i "put up a front" for his family. thats not true at all. i am myself always https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_cheers.gif sometimes i tone it down a little (like at work) but everyone i know knows about my pole dancing, even my grandma & my 77year old great aunt who watches my videos on facebook https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif
Then I feel sorry for her for apparently being miserable enough to feel the need to insult you in your home. For someone who’s known you practically all your life, she doesn’t know jack dittle about you which brings me to the most ovbious reason why a girl would call another girl a name without knowing the facts, because of jealousy. You are after all the hawtness (snuck a peek at your profile pic https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif ) and that combined with something completely smexy, such as pole dancing is urking to her.
I always found it funny when people said nasty things cause I see just as bad stuff on tv and movies. Plus half the girls that were so negative were the same girls at the nightclub dancing all sluty after a few drinks and going home with random men. But I was the whore, not them!
Another jealousy issue there and possibly low self esteem too. If girls have to be so friggin’ nasty to another girl and call her names without knowing if what they even say is true, then turn around and get drunk then sleep with strangers then I certainly do think it’s low self esteem whether they’ll ever admit it or not and if thats the case, it would tick them off even more when confronted which would result in them tossing more nasty names at you. I’ve known enough girls in my life that were like that, I would watch them give other attractive girls dirty looks then talk ignorant stuff about them even if they didn’t even KNOW who they were. Another reason I know is because I used to say nasty stuff about other girls occasionally and thats because I was jealous and it made me feel better about myself. I grew up though and stopped judging people I didn’t even know, I don’t even talk down about prostitutes because there’s always the possibility someone is forcing them into working as one.
I also notice that all you gals that get called whores and sluts is attractive and I pitty those who have to focus on hating on others rather than going out and getting their hair permed or straightened, their nails done or whatever to help them feel better about themselves.
I had the wrong impression about pole dancing at one time too and thought women were just being attention whores since there’s other jobs they could be doing rather than getting naked for strangers on a daily basis and I looked up some pole dancing on Youtube when I found a free strip club pass in the boyfriend’s pants pocket (I wash his clothes, so I gotta root in his pockets so I don’t end up washing change or some crap https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_lol.gif ). I was so burned up about it, but forgot about the card even existing when I found some interesting videos. It was either Karol’s or Veena’s that I found first and I was like "omg" and watched a pile more then signed up for this forum that same night. My opinion about pole dancing changed pretty quick, thats for sure. The Reverse Grab that Veena does in that "Ninja Spy!" video sent chills down my back, I LOVE that move. I also notice that pole dancers seem to have the best personality too, I was a bit against being friends with other females because of how nasty a lot of the ones I know are but this place seems to have a magnet that attracts people with good personalities because all the best peeps from around the world seem to be right here <3
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aww! thank you @DragonPhoenix
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aww! thank you @DragonPhoenix
You’re quite welcome https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_e_smile.gif
Being a dancer = being in shape, even for plus size girls and right now I’m not as toned as I’d like to be and I have a pudgy little belly. I see buns of steel and toned abs in profile pics which only gets me looking forward to pouncing onto a pole more and more.
A dancer’s body is one that you should admire, not hate just because you’re insecure about yourself. Either step up to them and ask for advice so you can not only enjoy the healthy benefits from it but feel better and sexier or walk away miserable and keep the snide remarks away because it only makes you look like an ass, judging someone that you haven’t even taken the time to get to know.
(I swear I’ll have to keep the second paragraph as a quote somewhere so I can say it to someone in the future, that seems rather closed-minded) https://www.studioveena.com/img/smilies/icon_exclaim.gif
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